I appreciate all men are not like this, but many are, and I cannot and will not indiscriminately agree to uphold men's leadership/authority without question and standards
We don’t have to uphold a man’s authority we are not married to, however, we do have to uphold our husband’s authority based on God’s design. It took me a long time to see that a husband’s position is recognized by God even if that husband is abusive. We don’t have to stay in the abuse; we are allowed to separate ourselves. Sometimes this is not possibly, however, God recognizes the abuse, and when the wife humbles herself to God and ask for help, God removes that man - sometimes to the detriment of the man to break the authority - God takes the man from this life.
But if the woman is not humble, she cannot have the peace she seeks, because God’s law dictates a woman is subject to the man - only a humble and meek heart brings down swift help from God. That’s just how it is.
Jude gives an example of positions and how they are to be honored and respected even if the individual is wicked,
Jude 1:9 KJV
Yet Michael the archangel, when contending with the devil he disputed about the body of Moses,
durst not bring against him a railing accusation, but said, The Lord rebuke thee.
God originally gave Satan a position of honor that the other angels recognized - they would not disrespect Satan because he’s evil, because of the position and honor God gave to him, although he will be punished in the end.
I also appreciate that some may view this as unbiblical but, as I stated, if Jesus came down and sat in front of me, I'd explain my position with an open heart and I believe He would understand my point of view comes from a pure place rather than a challenge to His authority and word
No He will not. He requires obedience and honor and respect and a humble spirit. We should not condemn ourselves believing we can ignore what He has put in place because how we feel. Of course He understands how we feel, but God says I change not. So in order for God to remove the authority the man has over the woman, the woman must recognize the authority and humble herself and ask God for help. Then God will help swiftly. But if we ask out of pride and out of our selfishness, our feelings, we will not be helped.
That’s the lesson to learn - humility is the answer!