How do you deal with the loneliness?

[MaryN]

I have such a hard time with being lonely, no matter how many people are around me. I feel so out of place. People tell me to "get over it". When I see something of my Moms, they say, "it is only things". And that makes it harder for me to want to be around people. I don't want pity. I just want people to understand that I am grieving. But I also am very lonely. It is hard for me to pick up the phone and call someone. Does anyone else find it hard to do the initial reaching out? Is that normal or am I the only one that experiences that? I sit at home and sometimes just sit in the dark with the TV on. I was always on the go before Mom got sick. When she got sick, I stayed with her night and day and my social life came to a standstill. And I would do the same thing over again. But my friends got mad at me because I wasn't there for them. Since Mom died, I don't hear from anyone. But then, if I do go out to do something, all I think about is Mom because we did everything together. I know I am rambling. But thanks for listening.

 

[joosiej]

I have felt very lonely since I lost my twin brother, and I understand where you're coming from. When you lose a special companion like a sibling or a parent (and I've lost both my parents as well) you feel lonely because you don't have their company. When I feel like that, sometimes I lie in the dark in my room and cry, but sometimes I sit and talk to John as if he was still with me. Which he is, and always will be, as I know he is watching me and keeping an eye out for me. Your mother will always be there with you even if you can't see or hear her. Talk to her and talk to God. Remember that no matter how lonely you feel, you are never truly alone because He is ALWAYS there with you, and always will be. When you feel lonely ask Him to be with you and He will come to you for as long as you need Him there.
I, too, looked after my brother when he was dying of cancer, and had problems with my friends afterwards. People were there for me, but because I didn't know how to talk to them, they didn't know how to talk to me. I asked God for help and He answered. Telling my best friend how I really felt helped because, naturally, she told other people and they soon came to an understanding about how I was feeling. My advice to you is to
And what you said about "things"... those "things" are part of your mother's life and you should not allow people to make you feel like they aren't important. I have kept many of my brother's things and find great comfort in looking at them, touching them, holding them close to me. View each and every item of hers as if it is as precious as your Bible - because it is.
Just remember that God is always watching over you and listening to you, and if you need anything that your friends don't seem able to provide for you, ask Him to help you out. I have struggled with my faith since I lost my brother but there is always comfort to be found in prayer. And as I said, talk to your mother. She will love you forever and remember you will be reunited one day.
Feel free to send me a private message. God bless.

 

[Norman Seifert]

Deleted

 

[seangoh]

Yup, start going to church regularly and being part of a cell group. Use this situation to improve on your dependence on God too. Don't leave this situation gaining nothing useful.

 

[TheThirdLink]