Fighting in Marriage? That's Normal.

Michie

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It's how you handle it that counts.

Last year, when we celebrated our 40th anniversary, each of our sons asked to have a few minutes to speak. I envisioned a lovely tribute to our marriage. I should have known better.

They were witnesses to our lives. They were there and saw it all. The good, the bad, the magic, and the tragic.

Cameron, our oldest, stepped up to the microphone: “Twenty years under their roof proved to me that my parents are not normal—at all. Not in an Adams Family kind of way. More like an America’s Funniest Home Videos kind of way.”

I admit, I got a little nervous in that moment.

Cameron continued, “I lived in a house of honest conversation—not necessarily always quietconversation, but honest. You knew where you stood with Mom and Dad and you knew where Mom and Dad stood with each other. I lived in a house where ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘Will you forgive me?’ were modeled daily. That’s not natural, not normal.”

I took a deep breath. He got it right. Well, half right, anyway.

Fighting Isn’t Always Bad

Continued below.