TheRealAriel

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I could see it being a good fit for some people, but I don’t think it would work for me. I never liked online/app dating either because I didn’t like the way it felt like an interview. Without building any trust or intimacy you dive into these big, personal questions. For some this is comforting and removes the “games” part of getting to know eachother. For me it is hard to be vulnerable, especially towards people who have no concern for my wellbeing, so it would feel awful to pour myself out quickly only to have him walk away immediately.
 
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Citanul

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Speed dating wouldn't work for me because I'm not a great conversationalist in person. I'm not good at coming up with things to say when put on the spot, so it takes time for me to develop any sort of rapport with somebody, time which I would have in speed dating. Also, as someone who is very much an introvert, the thought of having to engage with multiple people in quick succession just doesn't appeal to me.
 
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bèlla

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I've never done it but it was covered in depth on something I saw on television. You have to be quick on your feet and prepared. You don't get a lot of time to talk. Give that some thought before jumping in. You may end up disappointed.

~bella
 
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christiansoccerplayer

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I've never done it but it was covered in depth on something I saw on television. You have to be quick on your feet and prepared. You don't get a lot of time to talk. Give that some thought before jumping in. You may end up disappointed.

~bella
Thanks. I might go in with low or no expectations of actually getting a date or having a chance of getting a date, and just anticipate learning how to talk to women and have a meaningful/interesting conversation.
 
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bèlla

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Thanks. I might go in with low or no expectations of actually getting a date or having a chance of getting a date, and just anticipate learning how to talk to women and have a meaningful/interesting conversation.

See if you can find videos on YT on the subject. They give a lot of tips. You don't have a lot of time. It's over faster than you expect and you're on to the next. Less than five minutes for each person and I'm probably being generous. I think it was closer to three.

A bachelor style scenario would be more appropriate for most and I'm not cosigning their approach but you need time with people. Quick connections can occur. I've done it. But we spent hours talking over a period of time afterward to confirm our reaction.

Putting yourself in environments where people are more likely to converse with strangers is helpful. I used to recommend the theater, galleries and golf courses as easy entries. No one gets offended when you ask about a painting or performance or the game. It's expected. Think outside the box. Food is another. Cooking classes are good.

~bella
 
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sampa

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Thanks. I might go in with low or no expectations of actually getting a date or having a chance of getting a date, and just anticipate learning how to talk to women and have a meaningful/interesting conversation.
Keep us updated because I might try it out when I go back to online dating.
See if you can find videos on YT on the subject. They give a lot of tips. You don't have a lot of time. It's over faster than you expect and you're on to the next. Less than five minutes for each person and I'm probably being generous. I think it was closer to three.
This is good advice. I'll have to look into this when the time comes. There was a happy hour special time that one site offered, but someone that tried it said very few showed up, so one time she was facing no one and the next barely showed himself in the camera.
 
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bèlla

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This is good advice. I'll have to look into this when the time comes. There was a happy hour special time that one site offered, but someone that tried it said very few showed up, so one time she was facing no one and the next barely showed himself in the camera.

Do you think I give advice that isn't tested? I know it works and used it myself before I shared it with the women I mentored. I know where to find them.

~bella
 
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christiansoccerplayer

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Keep us updated because I might try it out when I go back to online dating.

This is good advice. I'll have to look into this when the time comes. There was a happy hour special time that one site offered, but someone that tried it said very few showed up, so one time she was facing no one and the next barely showed himself in the camera.
Will do. And it will be in person.
 
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