Should I Consider Marriage Under These Conditions?

[Antari Zephyr]

I know that being married doesn't revolve around sexual things. I'm 29 right now, and my health has declined to the point where I have memory problems, never damage, and back injuries. The reason I mentioned sexual desire is that once my mind was affected by the nerve damage, I completely lost all desire for that. I feel it would not be fair to the woman. I do desire to be close, but not something more. In the event that I am met with the decision whether to marry or not (since I'm kind of stuck in the house right now), would it be right (after informing her) to marry a woman? I get very lonely, I want a wife, but you see the predicament here.

 

[Bluerose31]

I know that being married doesn't revolve around sexual things. I'm 29 right now, and my health has declined to the point where I have memory problems, never damage, and back injuries. The reason I mentioned sexual desire is that once my mind was affected by the nerve damage, I completely lost all desire for that. I feel it would not be fair to the woman. I do desire to be close, but not something more. In the event that I am met with the decision whether to marry or not (since I'm kind of stuck in the house right now), would it be right (after informing her) to marry a woman? I get very lonely, I want a wife, but you see the predicament here.

Hi Antari I feel you can still get married. Maybe you can read about asexuality. That may be a subject that interest you. It is people that don't have sexual desires. You can tell the woman that you are asexual due to health issues. But as you heal that may change and you may have desires once more. I will pray that Jesus brings a loving woman into your life that will understand your health struggles and will be compassionate toward you.

 

[Antari Zephyr]

Thank you. I feel that would be best. I've healed from worse things that doctors couldn't figure out, so I suppose if it is His Will that I marry, and I do, I could pray for healing. I do know of women who don't mind men being unable to walk. I can walk, just not far. Now that I think about it, I recall a marriage like that which worked out. I guess it's possible no matter what.

 

[Kenny'sID]

Do you need companionship enough to be willing to do whatever it takes? I get that the answer to that may be a "no" but point being, it may well be up to you, desire or no desire. That is of course if you cannot find that asexual. I've never known anyone like that so you may have to advertise or make the best of things the best you can.

 

[Bluerose31]

Thank you. I feel that would be best. I've healed from worse things that doctors couldn't figure out, so I suppose if it is His Will that I marry, and I do, I could pray for healing. I do know of women who don't mind men being unable to walk. I can walk, just not far. Now that I think about it, I recall a marriage like that which worked out. I guess it's possible no matter what.

It is possible with God! I have chronic pain and am on disability. My fiance knows that there is a chance that I will not be able to work in my life. He still accepts me. I will pray that you find a loving woman who will accept your disability and that you will have a Godly marriage.

 

[rockytopva]

If E = mc2 then we can divide and conclude that...

Mass (m) = Energy (E/c2)

And there are three varieties...

Natural E/c2 - All mass is basically cooled plasma
Mental E/c2 - Mentally, A mathematical formula, but this has chemical and spiritual properties as well.
Spiritual E/c2 - E (motivation, warmth, love) / c2 (faith, hope, charity, joy)

"My hopes are not always realized... But I always hope!" - Ovid

Neither let the son of the stranger, that hath joined himself to the Lord, speak, saying, The Lord hath utterly separated me from his people: neither let the eunuch say, Behold, I am a dry tree. - Isaiah 56:3

I would keep the hopes alive. Even if they are not realized in this lifetime, who knows if the Lord will bring you back in the millennial reign and honor those hopes?

 

[Celticroots]

It is possible with God! I have chronic pain and am on disability. My fiance knows that there is a chance that I will not be able to work in my life. He still accepts me. I will pray that you find a loving woman who will accept your disability and that you will have a Godly marriage.

I have a disability which makes it so I can't work a full time job. I am on SSI. I hope I find a man who accepts that I'll never be able to work full time, that I'll always have chronic fatigue due to a disability, and may not be able to do things like care for a house or cook without outside support. And if I were to marry I could lose my SSI since I would be on my husband's insurance, and I would need my SSI to get in home support needed to help me cooking/shopping for groceries, cleaning, etc.

I couldn't handle having children physically or emotionally, so I'd hope the man would also not want kids.

I am high-functioning, and my disability isn't visible so it was hard enough trying to convince the state I needed support. Sigh.

 

[Bluerose31]

I have a disability which makes it so I can't work a full time job. I am on SSI. I hope I find a man who accepts that I'll never be able to work full time, that I'll always have chronic fatigue due to a disability, and may not be able to do things like care for a house or cook without outside support. And if I were to marry I could lose my SSI since I would be on my husband's insurance, and I would need my SSI to get in home support needed to help me cooking/shopping for groceries, cleaning, etc.

I couldn't handle having children physically or emotionally, so I'd hope the man would also not want kids.

I am high-functioning, and my disability isn't visible so it was hard enough trying to convince the state I needed support. Sigh.

I will pray for you Celticroots that Jesus protects you and helps you find the right husband for you who will love you and accept you for your disability. God bless you.

 

[Celticroots]

Thank you.

 

[zellestial]

I know that being married doesn't revolve around sexual things. I'm 29 right now, and my health has declined to the point where I have memory problems, never damage, and back injuries. The reason I mentioned sexual desire is that once my mind was affected by the nerve damage, I completely lost all desire for that. I feel it would not be fair to the woman. I do desire to be close, but not something more. In the event that I am met with the decision whether to marry or not (since I'm kind of stuck in the house right now), would it be right (after informing her) to marry a woman? I get very lonely, I want a wife, but you see the predicament here.

Let her make the decision, because by pulling away (if you are already in a relationship) you are taking that option from her and thus she would feel less empowered. Do not be trapped to the victim mentality, and obviously do not make her feel victimised as well because of your condition. It is going to be hard for each of you individually and also as a couple, but sabotaging of what could be a happiness in the future is faithless.

 

[Ronit]

I have a disability which makes it so I can't work a full time job. I am on SSI. I hope I find a man who accepts that I'll never be able to work full time, that I'll always have chronic fatigue due to a disability, and may not be able to do things like care for a house or cook without outside support. And if I were to marry I could lose my SSI since I would be on my husband's insurance, and I would need my SSI to get in home support needed to help me cooking/shopping for groceries, cleaning, etc.

I couldn't handle having children physically or emotionally, so I'd hope the man would also not want kids.

I am high-functioning, and my disability isn't visible so it was hard enough trying to convince the state I needed support. Sigh.

I have CP so I truly understand. It is physical and semi mild. But now that I'm reaching 40 the CP changes are letting me know. So I do understand. God Bless you

 

[bèlla]

I think its important to lay our burdens on the altar. Carrying them grows wearisome over time. It is my responsibility to communicate the desires of my heart and work within my capacity to attain them. It is God’s domain to handle the difference and fulfill the desire according to His will.

I once suffered from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia. It was really bad. But I dated the whole time. My partners pitied my pain and hated seeing me suffer. Looking after me was their primary aim.

I never viewed myself as sick or disabled. I had a disease but I wasn’t diseased. The difference is important. I didn’t stop living or learning during that period. I focused on the things I could do comfortably instead.

I wasn’t the sort to accept a provider. I was very independent. The illness taught me how to lean. I helped many who were hurting with encouraging words and emotional support. I started mentoring women relationally too.

Its pretty funny when I consider it in hindsight. God used me and I wasn’t a believer. But I had a servant’s heart. I recall feeling sad a few years ago about the things I hadn’t accomplished.

My aunt told me something I never forgot. She reminded me the end mattered most. Not to cry any further. I didn’t know my calling then. But God restored all the locusts had eaten. He redeemed the time.

No one knows what tomorrow holds. Keep going. After a while you’ll look back and see how far you’ve come.

~Bella

 

[Ronit]

Thank you. I feel that would be best. I've healed from worse things that doctors couldn't figure out, so I suppose if it is His Will that I marry, and I do, I could pray for healing. I do know of women who don't mind men being unable to walk. I can walk, just not far. Now that I think about it, I recall a marriage like that which worked out. I guess it's possible no matter what.

Hey I have a physical Disability myself. My legs are crippled by Cerebral Palsy

 

[Ronit]

Hey I have a physical Disability myself. My legs are crippled by Cerebral Palsy

Plus single. I've had to learn to love myself and be open to love
Best Wishes
Ronit

 

[Ronit]

I have a disability which makes it so I can't work a full time job. I am on SSI. I hope I find a man who accepts that I'll never be able to work full time, that I'll always have chronic fatigue due to a disability, and may not be able to do things like care for a house or cook without outside support. And if I were to marry I could lose my SSI since I would be on my husband's insurance, and I would need my SSI to get in home support needed to help me cooking/shopping for groceries, cleaning, etc.

I couldn't handle having children physically or emotionally, so I'd hope the man would also not want kids.

I am high-functioning, and my disability isn't visible so it was hard enough trying to convince the state I needed support. Sigh.

I understand you have my best wishes
Ronit

 

[Tokyo]

There is nothing wrong with wanting to marry with or without disability you're human! Marrying with those conditions can be a challenge but don't let that discourage you from living your life your future wife will see past those imperfections and you should as well! God bless you! Stay Positive Always!