My neighbor

[JadeStarr]

So last week I heard my neighbor talking to my other neighbors about me.He said,"You see that girl sitting right there (i was smoking in my smoking chair)..she's crazy..no man I mean real crazy..she does drugs..she does all kinds of drugs..she even asked me if i knew where i could get some weed from one time (not true)..i hear her talk about....(couldn't hear airplane) all the time with her knowing im (curse word) sitting out here the whole time." Then, last night he was talking to my next door neighbors brother talking about how i cussed someone out on the phone one time..then he was telling him, "Man she wants me..she reallly wants me..im telling you she wants me." My next door neighbor's brother says, " Go for it man she's within walking distance."

I was furious about him talking about me.I wanted to go punch him in the face.Then, I figured out why he was talking crap about me.He wants me.He's obsessed with me.It's like when your'e in the 5th grade and a boy picks on you and is mean to you but he secretly likes you except he's a 30 something year old man.

The crazy thing is I do want him.I've wanted him for 5 years. Except there's a couple of problems with that #1 he's married #2 he has a kid #3 he lives on the other side of the street from me in the neighborhood. #4 he's a drunk #5 I have a bf

Now, after I told my mom about him talking crap about me and him wanting me and stuff..she says he's "psycho"..told me to smoke in the backyard..so I did..I listen to Pandora Radio on my iPhone..I like to dance to my music while sitting there..I walk in the house.She asks me,"Do you dance like that out front?" I lied and sayed "no" I said "why, how do I dance." She says "You dance like a stripper."

so I think he say me out front dancing and thought i was doing it for him..which i wasn't weird enough..i was just enjoying my music..

but he must have liked it evidently..he's literally crazy for me..so much he can't stand it..I had an idea before all this that he wanted me..He'd walk over and "Can I have a cigerette." then he'd get nervous and walk away..next day "Can I get a light." walks away nervous can't even look me in the eye.I thought it was funny.

Now the fact that I know he wants me.I'm so like woah.Mesmerized..and the fact that he's so nervous to ask me is driving me crazy..i have never had such a strong urge to have sex with a particular person before...I don't know why..I don't even know why I'm attracted to him...just looks i guess.But then there's something about him that just drives me crazy inside.I don't know if I can handle myself.

I have a boyfriend whom I love so much...and its like he dont even matter when i think about this other man.I feel horrible about it.I feel like I can't change.I don't know how to be a good girl.

 

[Forealzchola]

Think about his wife. Don't be a stumbling block to their marriage. Cheating (physical) puts people's lives in jeopardy. Dont tempt if you think he is getting aroused, by you dancing. Stop dancing inn the front yard. Safe guard your boyfriend, safe guard his wife.

 

[dayhiker]

Hi Jade,
I think your list of 5 negatives shows you why you should stay away.
I'd recommend you come up with a way to not think and be around him in any way for 30 days. Usually ones emotions will back down if you can seperate from the desire for 30 days.

 

[JadeStarr]

I didn't know what I looked like dancing until my mom said something about it.I was oblivious.That's the only reason why I can think of why he's lusting for me.I just felt bad for being lusty back after the fact. It made me feel dirty to lust for someone so deeply

 

[debutaunte]

Please excuse me for being so forward but since you knew how to lie to your mother about how you dance out front, then you know how to correct your behavior and you gave a grovery list of reasons for not approaching your 30-year-old "alcoholic" neighbor so you know the difference between "right" behavior and "wrong" behavior.

So all you have to do is behave in a ways that other people accept from you and they will more than likely behave the same way toward you. There are exceptions of course but we know when we meet people who do whatever they want regardless of it is "right" or "wrong".

We just have to make sure we do whatever is in our power to not make excuses or justify when we commit misdeeds since we know what htey are when they happen to us. Just saying. May God Bless you sister.

So last week I heard my neighbor talking to my other neighbors about me.He said,"You see that girl sitting right there (i was smoking in my smoking chair)..she's crazy..no man I mean real crazy..she does drugs..she does all kinds of drugs..she even asked me if i knew where i could get some weed from one time (not true)..i hear her talk about....(couldn't hear airplane) all the time with her knowing im (curse word) sitting out here the whole time." Then, last night he was talking to my next door neighbors brother talking about how i cussed someone out on the phone one time..then he was telling him, "Man she wants me..she reallly wants me..im telling you she wants me." My next door neighbor's brother says, " Go for it man she's within walking distance."

I was furious about him talking about me.I wanted to go punch him in the face.Then, I figured out why he was talking crap about me.He wants me.He's obsessed with me.It's like when your'e in the 5th grade and a boy picks on you and is mean to you but he secretly likes you except he's a 30 something year old man.

The crazy thing is I do want him.I've wanted him for 5 years. Except there's a couple of problems with that #1 he's married #2 he has a kid #3 he lives on the other side of the street from me in the neighborhood. #4 he's a drunk #5 I have a bf

Now, after I told my mom about him talking crap about me and him wanting me and stuff..she says he's "psycho"..told me to smoke in the backyard..so I did..I listen to Pandora Radio on my iPhone..I like to dance to my music while sitting there..I walk in the house.She asks me,"Do you dance like that out front?" I lied and sayed "no" I said "why, how do I dance." She says "You dance like a stripper."

so I think he say me out front dancing and thought i was doing it for him..which i wasn't weird enough..i was just enjoying my music..

but he must have liked it evidently..he's literally crazy for me..so much he can't stand it..I had an idea before all this that he wanted me..He'd walk over and "Can I have a cigerette." then he'd get nervous and walk away..next day "Can I get a light." walks away nervous can't even look me in the eye.I thought it was funny.

Now the fact that I know he wants me.I'm so like woah.Mesmerized..and the fact that he's so nervous to ask me is driving me crazy..i have never had such a strong urge to have sex with a particular person before...I don't know why..I don't even know why I'm attracted to him...just looks i guess.But then there's something about him that just drives me crazy inside.I don't know if I can handle myself.

I have a boyfriend whom I love so much...and its like he dont even matter when i think about this other man.I feel horrible about it.I feel like I can't change.I don't know how to be a good girl.

 

[Timahani]

Jadestarr,

Thanks for sharing your story. I think it is human nature to have crushes on others or to want things that are off limits to us...thats normal...however, we have to be careful how much time and energy is put into focusing on things that are ungodly (or will bring damage to us or hurt others). Yes, I am sure he probably has some sort of crush on you, but maybe he is also saying "bad things" about you, because his wife is aware of his awkward behavior and it has caused some tension. It seems like he is "venting" his frustration to the others. I would protect my name if I were you and back off for a while...for the sake of your own "SELF-RESPECT" and that of his wife. .....I know its crazy and hard being young sometimes (LOL)...but I think there are some deeper issues here: 1) If you have a boyfriend and you love him so why are you in need of attention from another married man .....2) Is there emptiness in your life? Just ask yourself some questions and do some soul searching ....and I hope and pray that God helps you get through this.