Is It Sinful to Use Sex Toys? Are Vibrators & [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] a Sin?

[RoseRedd]

This question has been bothering me for quiet sometime and I am a bit embarrassed to discuss this, but I don't know who to talk to about this issue. I will be 18 soon, and I know starting at that age, it's legal to buy intimate toys. My teen years have been rough abstaining from sexual activity. I want to save myself for my husband. However, my libido is still quiet high after all these years (even while pleasing myself) and the only solution I can think of to help my urges would to be buying a vibrator.

I've been praying about this for a long time, and that's the only thing that keeps coming back to me. I do not want to give in to pornography (we obviously know that porn is a sin) but I cannot find anything about masturbation and use of sex toys in the Bible.

If I use a vibrator, I will stop using it once I am married. Sex is completely fulfilling so I hear, especially when it is between a husband and wife. I know using a toy/porn/etc instead of making love your spouse is a sin in God's eyes. But what about single people who are using it as a way to keep themselves pure? Would love some advice. :o

 

[BL2KTN]

Rock on.

 

[Shane R]

I don't know, but my wife and I do and did before we married. I feel like it is a concession to human weakness. We could go into a long, drawn out discussion of intention and motive but then some hypocrisy might come to light.

Here's the thing, a toy is not necessarily bad after marriage either. It can enhance the experience or make up for what is lacking as the new couple learn each others wants and pleasures.

 

[Inkfingers]

Popular (and dishonest) answer? No.

Simple (and honest) answer? Yes.

Focusing too much on the senses takes us closer to animals. Keep it simple, honest, and don't seek to attach an...amplifier...to the experience. Pleasure should follow, not lead. Using toys is pleasure leading rather than following.

 

[PrayerandPeace]

I'm going to say yes because u get aroused from lust? But I do think God would rather you do that, than to do it with someone else.

 

[Paulos23]

You will be supprised how useful some toys are after marrage. Some are ment for both partners, and can be fun for both.

As for sinful? Depends on your religion, but it tends to get lumped into the sex clasification.

 

[Inkachu]

Owning an object isn't necessarily in and of itself sinful. Sin occurs in the mind and heart of the person purchasing, owning, and using the object.

OP, you're still a minor. Your sexuality isn't even fully developed yet, and you're already manipulating it. You use the phrase "after all these years" as if you're 40 or 50 years old. You're only 17! I would encourage you to hold off on buying any "toys" and focus on becoming a young woman of God. The Bible may not use the word "touch" but it has plenty to say about purity, sexuality, virtue, self control, and godliness. Becoming dependent on sexual "toys" at such a young age is going to set you up for a lifetime of dependency on them. It's one thing to experiment down the road, once you're married and you and your husband decide you want to spice things up a little (which should be a mutual decision); it's another to steer your sexuality in this direction at such a young age, where you have no other sexual outlets (like a husband, an actual human male, which is what your body is actually designed to respond to, not a toy).

Owning a vibrator may not be a sin across the board, but I think it's a very bad idea right now.

 

[Paradoxum]

Why would it be wrong? Are you hitting anyone else with it? You aren't hurting anyone else?

Is it wrong to use a fork to eat nice food with?

Popular (and dishonest) answer? No.

Simple (and honest) answer? Yes.

Focusing too much on the senses takes us closer to animals. Keep it simple, honest, and don't seek to attach an...amplifier...to the experience. Pleasure should follow, not lead. Using toys is pleasure leading rather than following.

The senses are no more animal than human. It is immoral to wear glasses and look right and left while crossing the road? Is it wrong to wear glasses and to look at beautiful art work? How about using modern kitchen equipment to make something nice to eat?

Using tools to do something you like it's bad. To deny the sensuous nature of humans would be an insult to God, if he made us this way. Whether animals are sensuous too is irrelevant (and humans are a type of animal anyway; it is one of our biological categories).

Do you buy tasty food or do things that you enjoy? Does that make you animal like?

 

[Inkfingers]

Why would it be wrong? You hitting anyone else with it are you? You aren't hurting anyone else.

Is it wrong to use a fork to eat nice food with?

Would a fork qualify as indulging in carnal sensuality as compared to eating with a spoon or fingers?

The senses are no more animal than human.

Being lead by the senses is animalistic. In humans the senses should serve and follow reason, not lead it.

Do you buy tasty food or do things that you enjoy? Does that make you animal like?

Buying food that you enjoy is not bad.

Buying food simply because you enjoy it is.

All strong appetite, desire and emotion (whether fear, joy, anger, despair, contrition or whatever), and whether expressed or suppressed, is a sign of narcissism and arrogance, of an Idolatry of Self, where we believe that right and wrong answer to, and are defined by, our feelings, desires and appetites. It is the enshrining of the subjective over the objective, and if taken far enough is the route to madness.

 

[KitKatMatt]

I don't think it's sinful at all.

This is also an issue I've prayed about for many years, being brought up in a church where every sexual expression (save one position with your spouse) was considered a sin. I've never gotten a negative answer to this question from prayer.

And there are lots of married couples who use sex toys, by the way Some people use them just to add more spice, and sometimes one (or both) people in the relationship need some "help" and use them for that, too. The important thing is that both people in the relationship are comfortable with them.

 

[PsychoSarah]

I'd say the biggest negative would be when people find out you have them. Sinful, well, maybe it depends on how one views sin, and maybe the nature of the sex toy (I would imagine ones designed for more than two people to use would probably be a bit questionable). But I don't honestly recall any biblical verse which states that only 1 sex position can be acceptable or that inanimate objects can't get in on it.

 

[KitKatMatt]

Buying food that you enjoy is not bad.

Buying food simply because you enjoy it is.

What's the difference between "buying food that you enjoy" and "buying food simply because you enjoy it"? Because I simply enjoy all the food I eat, that's why I buy and eat it.

If I didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't buy or eat it.

 

[PsychoSarah]

What's the difference between "buying food that you enjoy" and "buying food simply because you enjoy it"? Because I simply enjoy all the food I eat, that's why I buy and eat it.

If I didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't buy or eat it.

Sin of gluttony has a lot of issues in history. In some cases, people ended up convincing themselves that eating in and of itself was sinful, and starved themselves to death.

 

[Inkachu]

What's the difference between "buying food that you enjoy" and "buying food simply because you enjoy it"? Because I simply enjoy all the food I eat, that's why I buy and eat it.

If I didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't buy or eat it.

I think he was leaning towards the whole "eat to live, don't live to eat" type of thinking. Food should be viewed as a means to survive and be healthy, and if you enjoy it in the meantime, great. But to eat food simply because it tastes good, and not because it's healthy or needed, is where you can venture into gluttony.

I'm not saying that's what "I" think, I'm just venturing an interpretation of what he meant.

 

[Gadarene]

This question has been bothering me for quiet sometime and I am a bit embarrassed to discuss this, but I don't know who to talk to about this issue.

With the greatest of respect, perhaps not an internet forum.

But I'll do m'best

I will be 18 soon, and I know starting at that age, it's legal to buy intimate toys. My teen years have been rough abstaining from sexual activity. I want to save myself for my husband. However, my libido is still quiet high after all these years (even while pleasing myself) and the only solution I can think of to help my urges would to be buying a vibrator.

I've been praying about this for a long time, and that's the only thing that keeps coming back to me. I do not want to give in to pornography (we obviously know that porn is a sin) but I cannot find anything about masturbation and use of sex toys in the Bible.

There are a few verses that people claim to be prohibitive of masturbation.

As someone who's still overcoming a lot of church-inspired guilt with regard to his sexuality though, I'm not going to refer you to them. I expect people will along to tell you what they are in short order anyway

If I use a vibrator, I will stop using it once I am married. Sex is completely fulfilling so I hear, especially when it is between a husband and wife.

Not necessarily. Sometimes you still need some self-maintenance.

I wouldn't see it as a problem though. Some spouses enjoy watching

I know using a toy/porn/etc instead of making love your spouse is a sin in God's eyes.

Based on what?

 

[Paradoxum]

Would a fork qualify as indulging in carnal sensuality as compared to eating with a spoon or fingers?

If you don't want dirty hands it could make the experience more enjoyable.

Being lead by the senses is animalistic. In humans the senses should serve and follow reason, not lead it.

The senses are human senses. If you have an issue with that then complain to God about him designing us badly, too similar to dirty dirty animals. Personally I have nothing against animals. If we are like them... well, it doesn't matter, as long as we don't hurt anyone.

You're denial of the sense is anti-human. Being a whole human means being reasonable and feeling.

Buying food that you enjoy is not bad.

Buying food simply because you enjoy it is.

Why? No one is hurt.

All strong appetite, desire and emotion (whether fear, joy, anger, despair, contrition or whatever), and whether expressed or suppressed, is a sign of narcissism and arrogance, of an Idolatry of Self, where we believe that right and wrong answer to, and are defined by, our feelings, desires and appetites. It is the enshrining of the subjective over the objective, and if taken far enough is the route to madness.

Is it wrong to play a sport because it is fun (not for health reasons)? To watch a film because it's funny? Watch a sunset for it's beauty? Sing a song because it makes you happy? To love someone just because you love them?

Desires are what motivate us, without which we wouldn't move. Reason can't make you eat food to stay alive. All things we do are ultimately because we care about something.

I'm not putting the subjective above the objective... I'm just saying that both reason and feeling are good and human, and can be meaningful in their own ways. You don't have to choose between them, you can have both.

 

[Gadarene]

Why would it be wrong? You hitting anyone else with it are you?

*flashes back to GTA San Andreas*

The senses are no more animal than human. It is immoral to wear glasses and look right and left while crossing the road? Is it wrong to wear glasses and to look at beautiful art work? How about using modern kitchen equipment to make something nice to eat?

Most condemnations against "hedonism" are only condemnations against a specific set of pleasures snootily categorised as "lower" because REASONS.

 

[Joykins]

Sex is completely fulfilling so I hear, especially when it is between a husband and wife.

this is the first of many jokes life and older people are willing to play on young people in hopes of keeping them "pure." It isn't necessarily true. My advice is to use that toy to learn what you like in hopes of teaching your husband how to please you. And if intercourse by itself just doesn't "completely fulfill" you (as it doesn't for many women), you can integrate it into your marital sex life.

 

[Inkfingers]

You're denial of the sense is anti-human. Being a whole human means being reasonable and feeling.

I'm not denying the senses.

I say their role is to serve reason, not lead it.

Why? No one is hurt.

Why do you ask when I already pointed it out to you in the last paragraph of my previous post?

Is it wrong to play a sport because it is fun (not for health reasons)? To watch a film because it's funny? Watch a sunset for it's beauty? Sing a song because it makes you happy? To love someone just because you love them?

Desires are what motivate us, without which we wouldn't move. Reason can't make you eat food to stay alive. All things we do are ultimately because we care about something.

I'm not putting the subjective above the objective... I'm just saying that both reason and feeling are good and human, and can be meaningful in their own ways. You don't have to choose between them, you can have both.

As I said, All strong appetite, desire and emotion is a sign of narcissism and arrogance, of an Idolatry of Self; which is putting the subjective before the objective.

It is where we believe that right and wrong answer to, and are defined by, our feelings, desires and appetites.

Seeking / taking excessive pleasure in sex, such as using an artificially stimulating toy, is part of that.

Whether you recognise that is irrelevant.

 

[PersephonesTear]

Because, you know... I can barely leave the house without tripping over some stray cat straddling her vibrator.