What are young adults looking for?

[ecatherine]

I am a young adult who works in the Lutheran Church. I have watched a lot of my peers who I grew up with at the churhc,not come back to church except for at Christmas.

At my church we are trying to develop a new worship service geared towards young adults. We are thinking of having this service be more towards contemporary worship service styles but we want to give young adults what they are looking for when it comes to a worship service.

So I would love to hear what your ideas are, if you are a young adult what would you like to see? What would make you come back to the church week after week? What would make you feel that connection to God and to the community? What influences your decision not to come each week?

I would love to hear any feedback, ideas, concerns, anything!

 

[Arcangl86]

What do you want to see? Why do you keep coming to church? That's a serious question. One of the biggest issues I have with many mainline churches in general is there obsession with "young adults." Yes the church needs more young people. But the special treatment of "young adults" especially with worship bothers me. You have those who love the informal contemporary style with CCM. On the other hands you have the very smell and bell types like me. You can't generalize. Maybe you should talk to your peers and ask what they are looking for in a church? You can have the high liturgy, but other events that appeal to young adults. You never know. Many of the high liturgy churches I've been to are also fairly young congregation wise.

 

[LukinNE]

Honestly, there are no particular guarantees, everyone's got their own reasons for going to church. Just using myself as an example, I go to a Lutheran church because I like the liturgical tradition, the choir-based music, the middle of the road, largely apolitical theology, and the specific mission projects of that congregation.

But for every person like me, there are others who prefer the low church, or even big box church environment, there will be fundamentalists who will never think pastor talks enough about hell and there will be liberal universalists that are insulted by the idea that hell could even exist. Some young people like traditional choirs, others prefer praise bands, some find politics from the pulpit to be necessary, and it's an anathema to others. On top of all of this, surveys indicate that among the unchurched, only 10% or so have any interest in joining a place of worship.

There really isn't a magic bullet, the suggestions I have would be:

1. Emphasize welcome and hospitality in church. All people want to feel welcomed and loved.

2. Have have an identity as a church. What is your church's purpose here? People generally and young people particularly like to be a part of things that they feel are improving the world. It's really valuable as a church to be able to say "we are called to XXXX and we are doing this by XXXX"

3. Don't fundamentally change your church in an effort to pander to young people. If a young person sets foot inside your doors and sees a joyful, God-honoring congregation that's passionate about doing God's work, the rest will sort itself out.

 

[AngelusSax]

I think the biggest thing young adults, and anyone really, is looking for is honesty within the congregation. If I visit a church and things seem phony (because the chatter after the service can tell you a lot), I am less likely to go back.

One thing I would love to see (speaking solely for myself here), is a church that has an open forum at some point (it can be before service or after, or even a special day), that is all about doubt and the discussion of doubts. Doubts written down, anonymously, and then someone just reads the doubt and then as a group, or even pastor-led, discuss the doubt and answer it to try to reassure in the faith. Everyone has doubts sometimes, after all, and I don't think the churches do a good enough job of allowing people to feel they are allowed to have those doubts, so we keep them bottled inside and eventually may feel like it's just not worth going through the charade anymore and leave the church.
Not sure all young adults want to see that, but I think it would be a welcome change in churches. (And no, I am not about to leave the church, lest anyone worry about that with me. I just know there are people who do quit going to church because they are tired to acting like they're more solidly doubtless than they truly are).

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

Honesty is good. Especially instead of hypocrisy. I grew up in a mostly fake community, so when I went to a Lutheran church youth group 1000 miles from home after college, where they were real and really alive, and they talked with Jesus every day, and about Jesus every day, and about what Jesus did and had done and wanted to do, (always in accord with Scripture),
I was enthralled, drawn, kept going back for more, until finally I was HIS (the greatest most important time in my life !! (or anyones life for that matter, eh?!)).

 

[Shane R]

I want to encourage the OP to look at some of the recent studies on Religion in America, and specifically on the religious preferences and practices of those under 35. The common findings are that most people in that age group go through a period where they drop out of church. Their return is typically due to a life changing catalyst, such as beginning a family or settling into true adult-hood. When they return they tend to explore and a majority are settling into liturgical churches, and usually High-Church liturgy.