*UPDATE* The power of confession.

[Elliemare]

A few months ago I came here very conflicted about finances and my past involvement in the sex industry. I felt at times resented by my husband because I don't bring in enough income. During those times, I tend to panic and immediately have thoughts of returning to some sex related source of income because in the past it was the only thing that I could depend upon to "save" me out of a financial bind.

Since then I have confessed my past to my husband and told him my feelings of financial insecurity. I've told him how I panic and all I can think of is the quick money of a sex type of job.

Since I made this confession, not only did my husband handle it very well, but I have had no more incidences of panic, no more worry about money, and quick-money jobs have completely left my mind! I no longer have that nagging sense of guilt and the devil whispering in my ear "You can't depend on anyone, you have to take care of yourself, you can always go get a job at a massage parlor." That stuff is all GONE!

I'm convinced that confession, repentance and praying that God will provide, I don't have to be in charge has kicked the devil to the curb! He knows he can't win with me anymore!

I'm amazed. I just realized that it had been months since I was plagued by these negative thoughts. It literally is no longer a part of my life. PRAISE GOD!

 

[hope4today]

Wow, that is awesome Elliemare!! I'm so happy for you. Praise God!!

 

[Elliemare]

I have to add, that when it comes to finances, we have been blessed and God continues to provide for us. The more I just give it over to Him, the more He takes charge and sees to it that our needs are met.

We have not only refinanced on our home and lowered our interest rate, but we've paid off several bills and freed up even more cash flow each month. Soon we will only have a mortgage and student loans as our only debt!

I have felt no financial strain since my confession, repentance and prayer that God will provide.... because He does!

 

[Elliemare]

I also have to add one more thing. I don't always think that its necessary to confess and air all of our dirty laundry from our past to everyone, or even our SO. I felt the need to confess my secret to my husband because it was impacting our relationship.

I had this nagging feeling every time I felt that sense of panic that "if he only knew"... Keeping that secret from him was taking its toll on us and impacting our marriage today, so it had to come out.

I think prayer is necessary to discern who, when and where to confess our sins too. Some times an impartial third party is good enough. Or a pastor or counselor. Sometimes its a person close to us that needs to know so that they can understand us better. That was my situation. I had confessed to counselors, yet I still wrestled with the issues. Through prayer, I knew that I had to tell my husband. I did and God has been blessing us ever since!

 

[hope4today]

I also have to add one more thing. I don't always think that its necessary to confess and air all of our dirty laundry from our past to everyone, or even our SO. I felt the need to confess my secret to my husband because it was impacting our relationship.

I had this nagging feeling every time I felt that sense of panic that "if he only knew"... Keeping that secret from him was taking its toll on us and impacting our marriage today, so it had to come out.

I think prayer is necessary to discern who, when and where to confess our sins too. Some times an impartial third party is good enough. Or a pastor or counselor. Sometimes its a person close to us that needs to know so that they can understand us better. That was my situation. I had confessed to counselors, yet I still wrestled with the issues. Through prayer, I knew that I had to tell my husband. I did and God has been blessing us ever since!

Yes very true Elliemare. You are showing incredible wisdom and I am so happy for you to see the freedom revelaing your secret has brought you and your husband.

I pray you will both continue to grow in him and continue to see his amazing blessings in your life.

Big hugs coming your way through cyberspace

 

[angel jazz]

Hugs u r So strong wish I was as strong as u r but all I can do is pray