Support Needed from Fellow Lutherans

[Protoevangel]

Update

Just thought I'd let all of you know that since opening up to you wonderful folks here, the open arms in my home church have been non-stop. The welcome has been overwhelming and full of genuine love.
I had a nice visit with our Pastor today and it couldn't have gone much better. Another Prodigal child returns and the joy is evident and breathtaking.
I start Bible study tomorrow night and I will be attending confirmation classes with my daughter for a while to help her catch up with the other kids her age.
We are truly blessed and without the community here and your loving support I know things might have gone more slowly because of my closed mind.
Thank you all so much.

Welcome home!

 

[ctay]

Sounds wonderful!!!! Great news!!!

 

[Jim47]

All the saints and angels rejoice over your coming back.

 

[porterross]

Thanks everyone. I have so much joy in my heart and calm in my soul right now that it's difficult to not want to share it with those who might understand.
You're all wonderful.

 

[ctay]

I went through the same thing last year during the Lent season!!!

 

[porterross]

I went through the same thing last year during the Lent season!!!

Good for you, ctay.

Did your DH attend church yesterday?

 

[ctay]

No he didn't. I help with sunday school and he won't come up to church and meet me up there unless I ask him if he wants to go and stay home until its time to leave for church

 

[Jim47]

No he didn't. I help with sunday school and he won't come up to church and meet me up there unless I ask him if he wants to go and stay home until its time to leave for church

It sounds like maybe he is a little afraid of church? Try to think of ways that you can use that to draw him closer and lessen his fears.

 

[ctay]

I know he's cynical.. Its hard talking to him about church, he starts getting a little huffy about it. I don't want to make him mad, I just got to figure out something and I just don't know what.

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

Update

Just thought I'd let all of you know that since opening up to you wonderful folks here, the open arms in my home church have been non-stop. The welcome has been overwhelming and full of genuine love.
I had a nice visit with our Pastor today and it couldn't have gone much better. Another Prodigal child returns and the joy is evident and breathtaking.
I start Bible study tomorrow night and I will be attending confirmation classes with my daughter for a while to help her catch up with the other kids her age.
We are truly blessed and without the community here and your loving support I know things might have gone more slowly because of my closed mind.
Thank you all so much.

Must be old age but it brought a tear to my eye.

 

[porterross]

Sounds more like he's afraid of Sunday School or Bible Study.
Was he good in school or is the idea of a classroom type setting stressful for him?

The intimacy and examination type setting of Sunday School may be frightening for him. To be honest, it's never been my favorite thing either because you never know how to disagree with someone's theories without casing problems. For instance, the Earth age debate. Some of us believe it is older and that the 6 days of Genesis were a period of time that cannot be adequately quantitated as less than 10,000 years old. This matter alone is not worth beating one another over the head in my opinion, but some people are insistent on bringing others to their way of thinking.

Also, maybe because he isn't as knowledgeable as you and others who've attended Church most of their lives, he feels he'll look foolish trying to converse with them.

These are valid fears and your quiet patience is probably affecting him more than you realize.

 

[RedneckAnglican]

Update

Just thought I'd let all of you know that since opening up to you wonderful folks here, the open arms in my home church have been non-stop. The welcome has been overwhelming and full of genuine love.
I had a nice visit with our Pastor today and it couldn't have gone much better. Another Prodigal child returns and the joy is evident and breathtaking.
I start Bible study tomorrow night and I will be attending confirmation classes with my daughter for a while to help her catch up with the other kids her age.
We are truly blessed and without the community here and your loving support I know things might have gone more slowly because of my closed mind.
Thank you all so much.

praise GOD from whom all blessings flow!...

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

I know he's cynical.. Its hard talking to him about church, he starts getting a little huffy about it. I don't want to make him mad, I just got to figure out something and I just don't know what.

Let it lay. The best example is a Godly example. When I was sooooo way out in left field with my life no one could tell me what to do. All that can be done is prayers for him from a Godly wife and/or friends.

I had to reach the lowest spiritual point in my life before I started the road back into the light. Nobody could help me because I didn't want help. I was in control of my life------yea sure Finally found out that only God can control my life and that I had made a total mess of it. Unfortunately some people have to find that low before they have a "turn around".

Not very reassuring for you ctay but for me it was a life saver.

 

[Protoevangel]

I echo what Radidio says.

Even if one dosen't hit a proverbal rock bottom before turning around, patience and prayer is much more helpful than poking and prodding. Take it from someone who required a LOT of patience and prayer.

 

[porterross]

I echo what Radidio says.

Even if one dosen't hit a proverbal rock bottom before turning around, patience and prayer is much more helpful than poking and prodding. Take it from someone who required a LOT of patience and prayer.

DO you know how many times I have run into my Pastor around our small town over the past 5 years? Dozens, but he NEVER asked me when or if I might be in church or even if I would call him, etc. and this is a man who knows my lifelong history in the Church and had to know my absence was not healthy for me.

He said he knew that I already knew where I belonged and that pushing me might be counter-productive. Wow!

It worked. You have no idea how many times I've thought about why he never pushed me....that was the Holy Spirit doing a number on me. Amazing to look back on.

The worst thing my Pastor could have done was pushed me or even asked me if I might attend the church I grew up in any time soon. It has to have been the devil just sitting inside my head, posturing for that to use it against me. The lack of pressure defused the devil's plan.

Patience, ctay. Provide the example of a Christian manner and let him know how much you love and respect him. You might be surprised.

God is great.

 

[ctay]

Thanks for all the advice, I hadn't really pushed all year. I told him this morning he had an invitation to come with me this evening to the Lenten service that's all I said, its up to him whether he comes or not.

 

[porterross]

So now he has all day to think about it....I hope you asked him after a sweet kiss or sumfin' lovin' like it. He is a man, after all.

 

[SPALATIN]

The worst thing my Pastor could have done was pushed me or even asked me if I might attend the church I grew up in any time soon. It has to have been the devil just sitting inside my head, posturing for that to use it against me. The lack of pressure defused the devil's plan.


God is great.

Porterross

The Devil basically got bored waiting for the Pastor to ask you that question that he didn't realize the Holy Spirit was ready to evict him from the premises by softly encouraging you to get back to the word and sacrament ministry you grew up with. As long as you knew that the door was always open for you to walk ink, the Pastor really didn't need to bring the matter up.

Ctay,

You might want to follow Porteross advice. Just let your husband know that the invitation is there and that while you would like him to join you you won't hold it against him if he does not.

If he does not join you, start sending up prayers again that the Holy Spirit will soften his heart so that one day he will want to go. If he does go, kindly thank him afterward and then be silent about the situation unless he brings it up.

 

[ctay]

He didn't go last night. I didn't pressure him either. Maybe one of these days something may happen and he'll go..

 

[Flatscan82]

Fellow Lutherans.
I am new to these forums and very much relieved to have found this site and especially this area specifically for conservative Lutherans.
I was raised in the LCMS and after many years of making mistakes and experiencing what the corporeal world has to offer, I know in my heart that I took being raised in such a wonderful religion for granted and turned my back on my devotion for a great many years.
Marrying a non-believer was a mistake and I have paid dearly for that mistake. Except for the beautiful child that this union produced, it was disastrous and I struggled for years to overcome the damage I allowed myself to be subjected to.

My point to this post is a quest for opinions and perspectives from those of you who perhaps made better choices and never allowed your life within the Church to fade from importance in your life AND from those who's circumstances may be similar to mine.

My child and I are beginning to attend church now and I want so much to have a conversation with our pastor (whom I've know most of my life) and express my regrets and desire to be a devout Lutheran again, but I am so afraid of being judged harshly by those in the congregation who have not made the same kind of personal mistakes. This concerns me because as a child I remember the conversations of the adults in the church about members who had been divorced and it they were judged very harshly.

My mistakes are my own, but I wish to commit myself to embracing my religion and changing my life for the better on the spiritual level for both myself and my child without having to answer too many uncomfortable questions regarding my absence form the Church.

Your opinions and guidance are heartily welcome.

You are a better person for your mistakes; they have given you special insight into the world that not many Lutherans and I dare say not many Christians has or ever will have. If any one looks down on you for the things you screwed up one, then they are merely not following the teachings of Christ. It was Christ who first said you should worry about the log in your own eye before you pick out the speck in your neighbors