God has brought me a mighty mighty long way from being abused ( Phyiscally, Mentally, Emotionally, Sexually, and Verbally). From the time I was 6 up until now and yes I am 21 years old and still getting abused ( Emotionally, and Verbally). I was didn't have many friends as a young a young the only friends I did have are the friends I am able to call my truest best friends and they always have been. I went through a stage of turning to self-inflection ( such as cutting, scratching, and even being bulemia). Many nights I would cry myself to sleep because I didn't feel loved, wanted, ugly, not smart, useless, or understood. Not growing up with family all the time moving fro place to place and even living in foster care. Having your own mother tell you, " When I was 21 your age now Brittany, I would have been in college but I had you instead." But God always made his presence known to me from when I was a baby, a little girl, and now an adult.I still am able to give a great praise to God all day and everyday. From being in Elementary bullied to the point that I got jumped and was almost killed and I was only in the fifth grade and being bullied in Elementary, Middle, and High school all the way to my senior year in high school and even got called out of my name plenty of times on notes in class being passed around. I even had a break down moment when I started given up on school(which was the most important thing in my family and to me as well). But running home everyday telling your family this girl keeps picking on me or kicking me or this boy pushes me down on the ground. I had to learn how to fight( The type of person I am... I am definitely NOT a fighter but if you step to my family then we have a problem). So I learn the technique of talking my way out of fights...Which actually helped through out in all of my years in school pertaining to fighting wise. Now don't get me wrong I still had some young ladies that would try me but then I have to put them in their place but my way was talking positively to them...Making them look at the bigger picture rather than I want to beat her up because she looked at me wrong or what not. I had one incident my first year in middle school where It was a different race(White) young lady tried to get me arrested by lying on me saying I had threat her all because she didn't like me because I was a different race than her. But God was always on my side and still is to this day. But the most things I went through God has always made me aware of certain talents that I have that would be soothing to me...I would Sing, Write, or even just listen music(Gospel music) all day long from a very young age 2 years old I started singing and Listening to music(Gospel music), and the age of 8 I started writing stories/ books (wrote my first book at 10 years old Title of the book: A Girl Trapped in her Own Life). But to say all of this is to say I am no longer getting abused and no longer doing anything to be harmful to myself; I stopped all of that when I was a teen. There are things that goes on in a person's life that you don't entirely know about until you take to the time to truly listen to them and not judge them by there appearance and actions all the time...Because they can give you exactly what you want but when you truly look to try understand the person look from the inside out instead of the outside looking in.So I give God the Praise and Glory for bring me this far. I am no longer getting abused and or doing anything to harmful to myself; I stopped all of that when I was a teen. I thank God for giving me the healing and closure I needed...I thank God for sending people in my life to show what Love is and how to display it upon others correctly, I never once looked for a pitty-party and people to feel sorry for me at all. God just wants me tell my story because HE has placed me in the position to do so now...I love to give YOUTH TEEN GIRLS spiritual encouragement and inspirational messages when God tells me to. God has sent youth Teen Girls my way whether it's on the city bus, walking to class, in class, walking to the library etc to mentor or instill something into them because either they can't talk to their parents all the time or friends all the time about everything...I have a GREAT LOVE FOR PEOPLE in general no matter what you did to me or what you are about to do for me( My walls have come down but not far enough to where I will let people take advantage of me and even though I went through all of that I am still going to love you and give you the same love the way God/ Jesus Loves me and everyone else...God Gets the Glory out of all of this and everyday. I understand my Position now in God...That's to be used by GOD in every way and whatever way He wants to use me...
