I was married for almost ten years. Lived with her for a 1 1/2 before getting married. We had our ups and downs. Lost a baby to SIDS, two miscarriages, dealt with a psycho mother-in-law, oppressive living conditions, instability. Lived below poverty with next to nothing. We had our happy moments when we got along, or when we went on trips, or went out by ourselves, carnivals, etc. Got married young and had two kids. We held together threw it all. We were a team when faced with oppression from the outside. We always stood together and we always held our ground.
It was rocky, though, because I had an illness I didn't know about but we both were fighting our way through it. My moods ranged from hyper and angry to depressed and sullen. I wasn't able to keep a job as a result. She left 4 times before I ended up in the hospital due to attempted suicide. There they found out I had a bipolar illness.
She came back several months later, miraculously (that's a story in itself). While the doctors and other professionals tried to stabilize me, we fought through our issues of marriage. Confrontations. Control. Money. Headship. Anger. Laziness. Insecurity. Jealousy. Abandonment. Things I won't even repeat. I was often gone from early in the morning until late at night with business, drinking, or going over to see friends so she got lonely. Eventually she became unfaithful and had affairs in my house and on the internet.
Finally, she'd had enough and disappeared with the children. After discovering her plans to move to Michigan to some man from the internet, I had a court order issued to stop her. It was only then that I found out where they were. A lengthy court battle followed, which is where I picked up a fair bit of Family Law knowledge. I eventually ended up with the children. One year later I got sole custody, primary residence.
We have been separated for 2 years now, and I blocked her phone number out of the phone as she was becoming a nightmare to deal with. We aren't divorced yet.
I freely admit that I contributed my share to the problem. I've walked the path and I learned from it. I've come a long way since then. If I can use what I learned to help just one person, then it was all worth it.
