I have hodgkins lymphoma

[ChristianNewbie123]

I agree with brinny. Hang in there. It'll be okay. I promise.

 

[anjelica]

Thankyou all. I am very concerned about posting because things have gone from bad to worse, and I cannot measure up to all your faith. LittlH thankyou so much for what you have said - and yes,, the ONE THING ABOVE ALL that I wanted was to have people come and pray with me. NO-ONE WILL COME. Bob, my husband, has contacted the priest this evening to tell him how bad things were, but he would not come. We have tried all around the town ( a small town really) and no-one will come. I do not really want to say this but I am seriously suicidal and I am sorry if that offends anyone. I am scared stiff of this. The priest was told of this but he still would not come.

I cannot hold on any more - I have lost all of my strength. It needs a miracle to save me, and I do not have a lot of faith. I know that no human being can save me - only God can. I am having very real problems with faith. I am sorry.

I believe that if a priest or someone else could have come to pray with me, I may well have gottten over this to some extent. It was not to be.

We did go to my brother's this afternoon but it was disastrous. I came away in tears.

I am sorry to all of you that I cannot be good. I am sorry that I cannot measure up. There are so many thoughts going though my head - all about death and dying. The specialist told me that I could die and I cannot get that out of my head. He told me it more than once.

I am so sorry everyone. Please forgive me.

 

[Miser]

Im praying for you dear sister. We may not physically be with you, but we are in spirit

 

[brinny]

Thankyou all. I am very concerned about posting because things have gone from bad to worse, and I cannot measure up to all your faith. LittlH thankyou so much for what you have said - and yes,, the ONE THING ABOVE ALL that I wanted was to have people come and pray with me. NO-ONE WILL COME. Bob, my husband, has contacted the priest this evening to tell him how bad things were, but he would not come. We have tried all around the town ( a small town really) and no-one will come. I do not really want to say this but I am seriously suicidal and I am sorry if that offends anyone. I am scared stiff of this. The priest was told of this but he still would not come.

I cannot hold on any more - I have lost all of my strength. It needs a miracle to save me, and I do not have a lot of faith. I know that no human being can save me - only God can. I am having very real problems with faith. I am sorry.

I believe that if a priest or someone else could have come to pray with me, I may well have gottten over this to some extent. It was not to be.

We did go to my brother's this afternoon but it was disastrous. I came away in tears.

I am sorry to all of you that I cannot be good. I am sorry that I cannot measure up. There are so many thoughts going though my head - all about death and dying. The specialist told me that I could die and I cannot get that out of my head. He told me it more than once.

I am so sorry everyone. Please forgive me.

Bless yer heart precious, we LOVE you. God loves you even MORE. Praying as i type. KNOW that in these dark dark moments, even if God seems absent and we cannot be there with you, God is closer than He may appear. Praying that moment by moment He ministers, strengthens, heals, and guides your heart, mind, spirit through this chapter of uncertainty. Father intervene, minister, comfort, and heal as only You can, in the name of Jesus, amen. (((hug)))

 

[brinny]

THat'll teach'im to try to live up to hiz new years resolutions

 

[brinny]

[pong]((((((((((hugs)))))))))))[/pong]

 

[brinny]

[pong]

[/pong]



Happy with lyrics - YouTube

 

[Jimmy P]

Anjelica, relax hon, it'll be ok...just take it easy ok?

God is there for you right now...don't worry about your faith at the moment, just accept as fact that He is with you right now...so don't you give up...this WILL pass...*hugs*

 

[brinny]

Anjelica, i was sitting at my computer with the window open once and i stumbled onto a bird singing video on Youtube and i played it....pretty soon, a bird was on a branch on the tree outside and started responding to the bird singing in the video, and then more birds, and more.....all responding to the video.....

it was delightful and hilarious.....just remembered you love birds....had to share it

 

[Criada]

You don't need to measure up to anything, sweetie. God doesn't depend on your faith
You are loved, sweetie, and we are praying - we may not be there in person, but we are with you in spirit.
Hang in there, please - God won't let you go, and you can get past this

 

[Jimmy P]

A cute moment, my son Eric:

 

[LittleH]

Thankyou all. I am very concerned about posting because things have gone from bad to worse, and I cannot measure up to all your faith. LittlH thankyou so much for what you have said - and yes,, the ONE THING ABOVE ALL that I wanted was to have people come and pray with me. NO-ONE WILL COME. Bob, my husband, has contacted the priest this evening to tell him how bad things were, but he would not come. We have tried all around the town ( a small town really) and no-one will come. I do not really want to say this but I am seriously suicidal and I am sorry if that offends anyone. I am scared stiff of this. The priest was told of this but he still would not come.

I cannot hold on any more - I have lost all of my strength. It needs a miracle to save me, and I do not have a lot of faith. I know that no human being can save me - only God can. I am having very real problems with faith. I am sorry.

I believe that if a priest or someone else could have come to pray with me, I may well have gottten over this to some extent. It was not to be.

We did go to my brother's this afternoon but it was disastrous. I came away in tears.

I am sorry to all of you that I cannot be good. I am sorry that I cannot measure up. There are so many thoughts going though my head - all about death and dying. The specialist told me that I could die and I cannot get that out of my head. He told me it more than once.

I am so sorry everyone. Please forgive me.

My wonderful friend, please please don't compare yourself to anyone. That only causes pain. Also, you never have to apologise for how you are feeling, even if you are feeling suicidal. I have told you before but I will say it again. I will never judge you. You are a beautiful, unique, precious child of God, who is gifted and talented in the exact way God wants you to be. We may be different but none of us are better than you. I know what it is like to feel suicidal - I have been there and it is not somewhere I want to be again. God is with us in our darkest moments, when all we feel is despair and hopelessness. Don't forget that Jesus was in anguish in the garden of Gethsemane. God does understand our pain. It isn't always easy to remember this; I struggle to remember it too sometimes. I just think that it is important to cling to.

I am so, so sorry that the priest wouldn't come to see you and that you feel so very alone. Please know that we are all here for you and that won't change. One of the most amazing things about being a Christian is that we are all a part of one family; a family who looks out for each other no matter what. My heart breaks for you, for all the pain that you are in. I am praying that you will feel God gently holding you, wiping away all of your tears.

Love and hugs xx

 

[Jimmy P]

Anjelica, Bob, how you folks doing?

 

[anjelica]

Feeling that there is a lot I want to say but can't say it. We NEED PEOPLE. People to come and help us - we are done in after eight months of me being bedfast and husband in a wheelchair who keeps on falling trying to look after me. We also need ministering to by Christ's people. That was why we called the priest but he would not come. I am facing possible death according to the hospital, and thus facing my Maker. I need to be ministered to for this. We have taken too much alone. Bob and I cannot manage alone any more. I cannot explain it or it would make too long a post.

Mother Theresa of Calcutta said the we are the hands a feet of God. I don't know if that make any sense or not, but if it does not, then ignore it. God needs people to minister to people. I could quote Scripture but maybe not right now.

 

[Jimmy P]

It's such a shame that the Priest wouldn't visit you folks, I really do not understand that...
Do know that God ALWAYS has the time for you even when His kids don't...oh if we lived closer to one another, you'd have a visitor for sure...

 

[anjelica]

I know Jimmy. I know you would come.

 

[anjelica]

We didn't only try one priest - we tried a few and anyway, I won't go into it but it seems this is a godforsaken town

 

[Jimmy P]

Wow...so sorry they don't wanna come by...I just don't get that...be nice to find their superiors and tell them about it...that just isn't right...

 

[ChristianNewbie123]

I'm still praying for you! God bless you! Sorry I'm not on that much

 

[anjelica]

You are right Jimmy. There was one day when we did not have any bread. What we had had gone mouldy. We didn't know what to do - we rang Social Services and everything and no-one would help us. So in the end we rang the priest and asked if there was anyone in the congregation who could get us a loaf of bread. He said there was no-one. We tried other Christian Churches. The same response was given by all.

This is how it has been right the way through. It has been a terrible, terrible time.

I simply needed to TALK as well, these past few days - about death and dying. This is because I am actually so ill and scared and needing Christiah people around me. Sorru y tuping is going now