I'm curious about how other people have handled forgiving others. It took me a long time to realize that forgiveness is not a 'feeling' but an act of obedience (Matthew 6:14-15). I started wondering about this after I was raped/held 'hostage' for 6 hours, escaped, and the police shot the guy in my bedroom. I had to testify at the trial, and deal with the aftermath of what had happened. I wanted to forgive this man. I knew it was what God wanted me to do, but it didn't FEEL like something I could do. And it wasn't something I could do without God showing me that forgiveness is about Him being in control of things, and me not playing the ultimate judge; if God was willing to forgive this man (if he would ever come to God seeking salvation), who was I to have higher standards than God....I began to understand that it's about obedience, and not having unforgiveness in my heart, and leaving revenge/consequences to Him. It was a process, then an act, and has been incredibly freeing. I was sort of stuck in the trauma until I was able to let go of the idea that I had to 'feel' forgiveness.... it was almost a 'just do it' realization..... anyway, just interested in hearing how others have handled situations where forgiveness is difficult, both by the situation and the understanding of what forgiveness is.