Feeling failure as a special needs parent - anyone else?

[KimandtheKids]

Hi there,

Well, first...just know that God is on your side and that there is a reason that you and your son are going through this. He's obviously a smart child, so maybe that will work in his favor. My son had some pretty severe behavior problems, too. I had tried most everything available, from books, to programs, to counseling (at church at school, and privately).

A lady that I know from church saw me having trouble getting him to get in the car at a restaurant, one afternoon, and told me about something that helped her son with her grandson. So, I'll let you be the judge, but this helped my son (and me), tremendously and I would recommend it to any parent...whether their kids have trouble, or not. <staff edit>If you would like information about this please send me a pm.
I wish I had a specific answer for you, because I know you're frustrated, but maybe that will help.

Take Care and God Bless,

Kim

 

[Mayzoo]

Just posting again to remove the blot that was placed here then removed----but I still see that name as the last poster, and it bugs me. So now I am the last poster!!

One step further--Laurie any update on your little trooper?

Mayzoo

 

[peace2usall]

You'll always have your good days & your bad no one is perfect........dont be so hard on yourself. Having a special needs child make you a special person.

 

[LaurieMomof3]

Just an update on Seth. The school system did a forced mainstream on all special needs students that were able to do the academic work...and it was the BEST thing that ever happened to him! He is now considered a full time regular student - not because of the school system's decree, but because of his own growth and adaptation to his class. He still gets some services, like speech therapy and some small group time...but 80% of his day is in with his peers. Seth is a beautiful child and never ceases to amaze me. God is so good!

 

[etmama]

That's awesome Laurie! I forgot to update on here...I took my daughter to get tested for Autism and she tested as not being autistic, but being delayed. An answer to prayer! Although...we are still having difficulties with school. She's 5 and in preschool...the kindergarden was too much sitting for her attention span and she wasn't quite ready for what was being taught. Now our hurdle is that she is too physical with the other kids (she doesn't know how to interact verbally so does so physically) and doesn't listen to the teacher. The teacher doesn't necessarily demand respect, so my daughter jumps all over that. I want her to stay there for the interaction with the kids, but the teacher says she's only good when I assist in the class. Any ideas on how to teach her to respect the teacher and to play nicely with the kids? We've tried reinforcement, but it only works well if I'm right there to reinforce right away. She is a very loving girl, just has a hard time paying attention and following direction sometimes.

 

[LaurieMomof3]

Well, I guess I won't be a help. So much has happened in the year that I posted this! But in April of 08, just after his 6th birthday, Seth was also dxed with ADD. It was a very long diagnoses time from what the teachers told me about his attention difficulties to my fears and suspiscions of the actual ADD diagnoses...trust me I did not want my child to be another statistic to be ridiculed. But he is now on Ritalin and it does help him very much. It took me several months to be OK with this medicine.

OUt next hurdle is the ongoing social skills one. He still covers his ears and runs away from his friends when they approach him outside of school. I have no idea how to help with that. He has to have another evaluation at age 7 and I am expecting to hear that he has Aspergers or mild Autism. And I am finally OK with it! I am such a different woman than I was 5 years ago!

 

[LindyLouWho]

Not allowing myself to feel failure or get down on myself. Surround yourself with friendly people/parents with special needs kids. I see things alot more openly online and offline the more input I have into what it takes to parent these children. We are not alone.You are one of us. What support do you have?