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Here are your questions and my reply's to your questions.
Question #1: IF one can know when the coming is near based on seeing the events of the olivet discourse play out, Did the authors of the NT live through the events of the olivet discourse when they said it was the last hour, the parousia was near, the coming was in a little while without delay, it was the end of all things, etc...????
No they did not live through the coming of Jesus
Concerning the word
parousia
You should study the Olivet Discourse Matthew 24, it is explained there. Here is just a little explanation on Jesus second advent.
Start at verse 36 it is stated no one knows and this advent is described as sudden and unexpected as the flood was in Noah's day. Jesus plainly states His coming (parousia) is sudden and unexpected
“But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, but My Father only. But as the days of Noah were, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. For as in the days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, and did not know until the flood came and took them all away, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. Then two men will be in the field: one will be taken and the other left. Two women will be grinding at the mill: one will be taken and the other left. Watch therefore, for you do not know what hour your Lord is coming. But know this, that if the master of the house had known what hour the thief would come, he would have watched and not allowed his house to be broken into. Therefore you also be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect.
But this would not be true if Jesus' coming was at the conclusion of the Great Tribulation. Many mistakenly placed Jesus' second coming at
Matthew 24: 29-30.
Matthew 24: 29-31 does not use Jesus' special word (parousia).
Matthew 24: 29-31 dos say the tribulation is immediately followed by unparalleled heavenly events involving the sun, moon and stars. These heavenly events are followed by the sign of The Son of Man. But the word parousia is not used.
But to see Jesus coming like this is not the same as describing His descent from the presence of God (The Father). In fact it can not precisely that.
At the time that the world sees Jesus this way (sign of The Son of Man) He is already the clouds that are found in the heaven (sky). But when did His coming from God's presence begin? When in fact does the parousia really began.
The parousia begins at the time God's judgments begin. The coming will be like the flood suddenly. Therefore the coming will occur at a time when uninterrupted human life is going on as usual. Just as it was before the flood. So this means the coming of Jesus can not actually be at
Matthew 24: 29-31, as this is a most sever time on earth, that is these days were not cut short no flesh would have survived.
So the parousia begins without a sign, it is only after the tribulation of thoses days is the sign of The Son of Man is seen in heaven (the sky). The term parousia also does not simply refer to an arrival, it clearly covers a span of time, the time of the tribulation.
Question #2: IF the NT authors did not live through the events of the olivet discourse, why did they say the coming was near? in other words, Why wouldn't they just respond like Paul, that the coming was not near because certain things hadn't happened yet (2 thessalonians 2:2-3)????
Because Jesus' second coming could have happened at any time with out notice.
The day of Christ, is the bema seat judgment of The Messiah and not the tribulation.
“The Day” Is the Judgment Seat of Christ – Grace Evangelical Society
Question #3: IF the NT authors cannot declare it is near, who gets to decide or who has the authority to declare what events of the olivet discourse indicate its near like a fig tree sprouting leaves, especially considering all of failed predictions
God has declared in The Bible how the events will play out.