- Jun 16, 2016
- 332
- 387
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Others
Hello everyone,
Last night my fiancee texted me that he was anxious so I called him. He then proceeded to tell me that he was feeling really anxious about our engagement and feeling like where doing things too soon such as the engagement party and photos. Another reason why he is feeling anxious is because, he's about to start a new job in a neighboring city. I'm just feeling very frustrated because, I feel he is hitting the brakes on what we're currently doing and what we've been talking about for a while now with him and I and also our family and friends. So we are getting married next year and I am currently in school and I'm wanting to take it slow but, also break some of this up into pieces. I was hoping that this year we would do our engagement stuff and that we would do it in the spring. I let him pick when we're gonna have the wedding and what season and so, I thought maybe this was fair for me to pick when we are doing the engagement stuff. I usually let him make the decisions on things that we do but I feel like there's times where I would like to make a decision but, that does not always happen because of his anxiety. We both experience anxiety due to our disabilities. So, I'm frustrated also because, he's going off of what my dad is saying when it comes to my dad allowing me to continue to stay in my apartment that he's paying for while I'm in school. My problem with this is that I have abusive and controlling parents and I'm just letting them pay for my place until I'm out of school. Which I am graduating in a year and our wedding isn't about a year and a half to two years. I'm just frustrated because, my fiance also just does not understand that I no longer want to have my dad paying for my place. I want my fiancee and I to move into an affordable house or rent one so, that my dad no longer has to pay. I have tried explaining this to my fiancee multiple times and he is just so trusting of people because, he comes from a family that is not like mine. It is also very hard to explain things to him when he is feeling so anxious. He also expressed to me last night that he is very forgetful and they he forgets simple tasks and even forgets certain things about me. Which I understand that's like and also I can be a very forgetful person especially when I'm very busy. I remember that I started noticing him getting anxious last night when I mentioned that I had found a dress and some boots for us to take engagement photos. Which I have to order soon because, I have to order them before spring so, that they get here on time. But I'm questioning should I even buy the outfit right now? Part of me is afraid that he's going try to move the dates of the engagement photos when I really wanted them in the spring this year. I was really wanting to do the engagement stuff this year and then do more of the wedding stuff and finding a place to live even more so next year. I wanted to do the easier stuff while I'm in school and do some of the tougher stuff after I graduated which also involves going on a vacation with my sisters next year. There is just so much going on with planning so many different things and me going to school and having to deal with my abusive parents and my fiancee is mostly out of that stuff when it comes to planning and also when it comes to not actually having to deal with my parents the way I have to because, they're abusing me and not him. He knows that they abuse me and he knows that my dad's very controlling. I really try not to set my dad off and I actually really don't want to talk to my family even though they are paying for my Room and board while I'm going to school. They are sadly not safe people. I am puzzled on what I should do next. It's like should I continue to go forward with my plans for engagement photos and party? Or should we stop altogether until next year where we will probably have only 9 months to prepare everything from the engagement photos all the way up to the wedding? My fiance is saying that for the next couple weeks he does not want talk about anything to do with our engagement or the wedding. And I think a part of this has to do with him transitioning to his new job in the neighboring city. In times like these it really does make me feel like he is hitting the brakes on the plans that we're doing and also makes me wonder if he wants to be engaged or married especially when he is the one who proposed to me.
Please pray for us and any Christian counsel and advice is appreciated.
Last night my fiancee texted me that he was anxious so I called him. He then proceeded to tell me that he was feeling really anxious about our engagement and feeling like where doing things too soon such as the engagement party and photos. Another reason why he is feeling anxious is because, he's about to start a new job in a neighboring city. I'm just feeling very frustrated because, I feel he is hitting the brakes on what we're currently doing and what we've been talking about for a while now with him and I and also our family and friends. So we are getting married next year and I am currently in school and I'm wanting to take it slow but, also break some of this up into pieces. I was hoping that this year we would do our engagement stuff and that we would do it in the spring. I let him pick when we're gonna have the wedding and what season and so, I thought maybe this was fair for me to pick when we are doing the engagement stuff. I usually let him make the decisions on things that we do but I feel like there's times where I would like to make a decision but, that does not always happen because of his anxiety. We both experience anxiety due to our disabilities. So, I'm frustrated also because, he's going off of what my dad is saying when it comes to my dad allowing me to continue to stay in my apartment that he's paying for while I'm in school. My problem with this is that I have abusive and controlling parents and I'm just letting them pay for my place until I'm out of school. Which I am graduating in a year and our wedding isn't about a year and a half to two years. I'm just frustrated because, my fiance also just does not understand that I no longer want to have my dad paying for my place. I want my fiancee and I to move into an affordable house or rent one so, that my dad no longer has to pay. I have tried explaining this to my fiancee multiple times and he is just so trusting of people because, he comes from a family that is not like mine. It is also very hard to explain things to him when he is feeling so anxious. He also expressed to me last night that he is very forgetful and they he forgets simple tasks and even forgets certain things about me. Which I understand that's like and also I can be a very forgetful person especially when I'm very busy. I remember that I started noticing him getting anxious last night when I mentioned that I had found a dress and some boots for us to take engagement photos. Which I have to order soon because, I have to order them before spring so, that they get here on time. But I'm questioning should I even buy the outfit right now? Part of me is afraid that he's going try to move the dates of the engagement photos when I really wanted them in the spring this year. I was really wanting to do the engagement stuff this year and then do more of the wedding stuff and finding a place to live even more so next year. I wanted to do the easier stuff while I'm in school and do some of the tougher stuff after I graduated which also involves going on a vacation with my sisters next year. There is just so much going on with planning so many different things and me going to school and having to deal with my abusive parents and my fiancee is mostly out of that stuff when it comes to planning and also when it comes to not actually having to deal with my parents the way I have to because, they're abusing me and not him. He knows that they abuse me and he knows that my dad's very controlling. I really try not to set my dad off and I actually really don't want to talk to my family even though they are paying for my Room and board while I'm going to school. They are sadly not safe people. I am puzzled on what I should do next. It's like should I continue to go forward with my plans for engagement photos and party? Or should we stop altogether until next year where we will probably have only 9 months to prepare everything from the engagement photos all the way up to the wedding? My fiance is saying that for the next couple weeks he does not want talk about anything to do with our engagement or the wedding. And I think a part of this has to do with him transitioning to his new job in the neighboring city. In times like these it really does make me feel like he is hitting the brakes on the plans that we're doing and also makes me wonder if he wants to be engaged or married especially when he is the one who proposed to me.
Please pray for us and any Christian counsel and advice is appreciated.