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My Christian boyfriend cheated on me.
- Thread starter sincerelyW
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Psalm3704
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
i agree, the task now is to run the race that is set before you.
The temptation to quit at this stage is a very common one, and there is a reason behind it as well
that you may not have thought of.
what you are in now is a marathon race to graduation. this is the time when things change in your learning.
before this you were taking in information like a sponge,
but now is the time when you begin to put all that info to work.
Everything steps up a gear, but you also have new opportunities that were not there before.
it will be a challenge, but you have been training for years now, and are well prepared for it.
as with any race there are distractions as well as challenges along the way, and never more so than on
the last leg of the race.
there will be the distractions that tell you you can't make it, that you're tired, confused,
doubting why you are running, and just putting one step in front of the other is getting harder and harder to do.
Sound familiar? It should, because every single person who is just within reach of achieving their dream
has had to deal with these same exact feelings.
What these feelings should be telling you is that you have achieved a great deal indeed, and that you are
far more capable that you ever thought you were.
yes, there will be distractions along that last mile of the race that are designed to throw you off course.
but think about it;
did you ever see someone crossing the finish line toting a BBQ grille, or a cooler of cold drinks, or a lawn chair?
NOPE!
and the reason they passed those temptations by is because they kept their eyes on that finish line ahead of them,
knowing that reaching that goal was much more important than the things that could turn them aside from the race,
or give them ease from the temporary discomfort that they were feeling.
so instead of listening to the pain they listened instead to the crowd of well-wishers cheering them on, as they came ever closer to that
victory at the finish line of triumph. They broke through their doubts and they gained the crown!
you can do the same thing.
This is good information from pdudgeon for everyone.
So many Christians don't realize they must to run this race till the end. It's mandatory for salvation as this race is a Christian's training for spiritual growth and conversion.
People can't go to heaven with a sinful nature. The race Paul spoke of is a constant battle of the mind between Christians and satan. True Christians will often fight temptation (satan), professing Christians are usually following temptation. The battle is hardest in the beginning but gradually gets easier and easier with each step as you're constantly changing, becoming more and more spiritual minded and develop a greater immunity to carnality with Christ guiding you.
And as long as satan is still on the loose, he'll try to deceive every Christians to fall away up until the day they die.
Matthew 24:13 But the one who remains faithful to the end will be saved.
2 Timothy 4:7-8
7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 8 Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.
Romans 12:2 Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God - what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.
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Thank you for providing scripture - you're right, satan is a deceiver. And a masker of light. I found something interesting as I was reading in Proverbs this morning:
Proverbs 9:13-18
"The woman Folly (or foolishness) is loud, she is seductive and knows nothing.
She sits at the door of her house, she takes a seat on the highest places of the town, calling to those who pass by,
who are going straight on their way. "'Are you confused about life - don't know what's going on? Steal off with me, I'll show you a good time! No one will ever know - I'll give you the time of your life.'" And to him who lacks sense she then says, "Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant." But he does not know that the dead are there and the skeletons are in her closet, and her guests are in the depths of hell."
When all is finished, I want to be able to say "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me--the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing." 2 Timothy 4:7-8 and like Moses, "choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the fleeting and passing pleasures of sin." Hebrews 11:25
Thank you, Jesus - you set me free.
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Sketcher
Born Imperishable
Are you transferring to another school back home?
Also, now is a great time for you to get involved with a campus ministry or young adult group. Christian community is essential, and since you recognize that Satan is ultimately responsible for this whole ordeal, it makes that much more sense to get involved with other Christians.
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MichelleNaomi22
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- Jun 18, 2016
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So my story is a little different. I went to a party with my boyfriend last yearnand got wayy too drunk. It got to the point where I was almost blackout drunk. Im so used to him being by my side at parites that I didnt realize the guy next to me wasn't him. They were even wearing the same color shirt! So this guy makes a move on me and starts kissing me but im so drunk that I don't realize its not my boyfriend until he stops kissing me and I see his face. My bf's friend saw me and told him. I didn't even realize that this had happened until I saw the guys face a couple weeks later and it all came back to me. This really hurt our relationship and I felt so bad. He is my first love and I would never do anything purposeful to hurt him. Flash forward about 8 months and he starts lying about going out with his friends. I've been doing everything I can to try and mend our relationsip and he has be so withdrawn. We made some progress and I thought our relationship was finally getting better when I found out he lyed about going to a strip club with his friends including this girl he use to be friends with. He promised me nothing happened and told me at least he didnt cheat because he can control himself. 2 months later(last night) i found out he cheated on me with her on purpose and was drunk but knew what he was doing. I'm so hurt and shocked but since I love him so much my mind is clouded and I can't decide if I should leave him.
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QuietBeauty
Active Member
I'm sorry that this has happened to you - If he was the only real reason you were there, You should go back home to be with your family. You need to be surrounded by people who truly love and care for you right now. You need people in your corner who can lift you up.
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I'm sorry about your bf cheating on you, and I'm also sorry about your pastor being such a coward by giving you such generic advice. Wait on God and see what He says, ha ha give me a break. That will only cause more torment by making you passive and expecting a reply that never comes. Be proactive. Confront your bf, and see if he apologizes, and make sure he is sincere about it. If not, then leave him and start seeing other guys. Don't make relationships such a big deal, because otherwise they are idols. Other guys will come along, better ones.
One of the biggest lies of the enemy is that you won't find anybody better or that you won't be in love as much as with anybody else. Find other guys, there are better ones. I'm a guy writing this so no homo lol.
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NothingIsImpossible
Well-Known Member
This is just my advice but I would say forgive him and continue the relationship. Why do I say that? Well one time is a mistake, TWICE is a choice. If he does it again then there is no excuse and its over. Now does this mean you can trust him? No. Tell him you he will need to rebuild your trust again and it could take awhile. Actually if you want a faster answer ask to see his phone or his facebook...etc. If that is the only thing he is guilty of then he should have nothing to hide from you aside from some possibly illicit message with his exgf.
If he doesn't want you see his phone, web history...etc then I'd say call it off with him. Yes I did say give it another chance. But he has to understand your trust level is reset now. The first step in trust is if he let you see his phone and stuff. After all your doing this all for him. He has to sacrifice privacy in this case to show he can be trusted. After all what if you find out hes also been looking at porn or chatting to other girls throughout the two years? What if he has nude pics of other girls? Not trying to sound paranoid but technology allows for EASY cheating in todays world.
If he says he doesn't want to show you anything or if he says "Tommorow" then ditch him. That will just give him an chance to delete any evidence. After all hes just BF, so its nothing to serious yet.
If he doesn't want you see his phone, web history...etc then I'd say call it off with him. Yes I did say give it another chance. But he has to understand your trust level is reset now. The first step in trust is if he let you see his phone and stuff. After all your doing this all for him. He has to sacrifice privacy in this case to show he can be trusted. After all what if you find out hes also been looking at porn or chatting to other girls throughout the two years? What if he has nude pics of other girls? Not trying to sound paranoid but technology allows for EASY cheating in todays world.
If he says he doesn't want to show you anything or if he says "Tommorow" then ditch him. That will just give him an chance to delete any evidence. After all hes just BF, so its nothing to serious yet.
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Cernunnos
Well. . .
- May 28, 2014
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Better to see the dudes true colors and toss him now, than after a wedding or kids. Toss him. Sex is a "no backsies" issue, cheating is a one way door. Personally, I think cheaters should be unable to be victims (legally) . . . their exes should be able to cut on 'em to whatever extent, with legal immunity.
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Obviously, you have dedicated yourself to the Lord, but he hasn't. Let him go, move forward with Jesus. And next time you find a potential mate, court and make sure he's a solid Christian with convictions that mean something in his life.
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