Masturbation as a sin

[Lots of Questions]

I'm an adult in my mid 20's, I know I'm not the most mature person in the world but I've been struggling with this a lot lately. I'm not addicted to masturbation but I feel like I can't avoid doing it every once in a while, and I think the reason it bothers me so much is because I can't be 100% sure whether it's a sin or not.
If I don't touch like once a week I get too overwhelmed by stress from my everyday life. But if I do touch, I fear that I may be going against God. I know the second is more important but even so it's not easy to control it.
The thing is, I've researched as much as I could but I can't find any scripture that I think is absolutely about this. I've seen Christians quote that part where Jesus talks about "looking at a woman with lust". Or the Onan story. Or some quotes from Paul about how the body is the temple of Christ and self control.
I asked a priest and he told me masturbation IS a sin. But I've also seen Christians on the Internet saying masturbation is the lesser of two evils if it means it can be a release that stops you from commiting a worse sin (like fornication?). Doctors regardless of religion seem to say it's healthy and that it's okay as long as it's not addictive.

So I have a bunch of questions about this subject:

• What scriptures are the most clear about masturbation being a sin (if it is)?
• What did Jesus mean when he said that about looking at a woman with lust? I mean it's quite impossible to never absolutely ever get turned on by someone (unwillingly).
• What is the healthiest alternative to masturbation? I mean I try to distract myself, pray, read the scriptures. But I still get stressed out and weak eventually.
• If it's a sin, why is it a sin? I've been told at some point that a sin is something that means you are not loving someone else (and that you love or unlove God by your actions towards other people). Who isn't loved when you touch? I'm currently single but I would obviously put my partner in the first place if I were with one. If it's offensive to God then why exactly would He pick something as arbitrary and specific as this? I know pornography can come into play but do porn performers feel unloved if someone masturbates to them?
  
• If it's a sin, how bad as a sin is it? Or are all sins equal? I've learned at some point that some sins are mortal, others aren't.
• Do average Christians touch? Or are they being honest when many of them imply or claim they don't?

I think a reason this bothers me so much was that even though I hardly ever masturbated before becoming a Christian, I wasn't worried back then about whether it was a sin or not, it was just a mundane action. But now I can't help bringing God into the equation and only thinking about how MAYBE I lose His love or friendship, but only after doing it.
I'm also worried that this may be something many people must struggle with. But I get the impression that most Christians on the Internet that speak against it sound like they never touch and I feel more alienated from them that way since it just seems unnatural to be able to avoid it unless they are asexual.
I live surrounded by Christians but I'm sure most of them at least have premarital sex. I currently don't and I know I can't judge others but I struggle with accepting that every Christian has their own idea of what's right and wrong. I know that common sense could help understanding if something is a sin, and that knowing if you can "do it in the name of God" or "for the Grace of God" can also help, but neither of these apply directly to masturbation. Common sense tells me masturbation is at least healthy (doctors say it) and the other part is just too vague. I know people as friends don't mind if their friends touch in private and Jesus refers to Himself as a friend who just asks us to love each other.

Thanks a lot in advance for any answers!!
God bless.

 

[JackRT]

We must realize, that in Biblical times, it was believed that the father, and the father only, contributed what we would today call the genetic make up of the child. What they called the male seed was regarded as containing an entire nascent human being. As a consequence, they regarded any wastage of the seed as tantamount to murder. This explains why masturbation, coitus interuptus and even wet dreams were considered to be serious sins.

 

[Danielwright2311]

I'm an adult in my mid 20's, I know I'm not the most mature person in the world but I've been struggling with this a lot lately. I'm not addicted to masturbation but I feel like I can't avoid doing it every once in a while, and I think the reason it bothers me so much is because I can't be 100% sure whether it's a sin or not.
If I don't touch like once a week I get too overwhelmed by stress from my everyday life. But if I do touch, I fear that I may be going against God. I know the second is more important but even so it's not easy to control it.
The thing is, I've researched as much as I could but I can't find any scripture that I think is absolutely about this. I've seen Christians quote that part where Jesus talks about "looking at a woman with lust". Or the Onan story. Or some quotes from Paul about how the body is the temple of Christ and self control.
I asked a priest and he told me masturbation IS a sin. But I've also seen Christians on the Internet saying masturbation is the lesser of two evils if it means it can be a release that stops you from commiting a worse sin (like fornication?). Doctors regardless of religion seem to say it's healthy and that it's okay as long as it's not addictive.

So I have a bunch of questions about this subject:

• What scriptures are the most clear about masturbation being a sin (if it is)?
• What did Jesus mean when he said that about looking at a woman with lust? I mean it's quite impossible to never absolutely ever get turned on by someone (unwillingly).
• What is the healthiest alternative to masturbation? I mean I try to distract myself, pray, read the scriptures. But I still get stressed out and weak eventually.
• If it's a sin, why is it a sin? I've been told at some point that a sin is something that means you are not loving someone else (and that you love or unlove God by your actions towards other people). Who isn't loved when you touch? I'm currently single but I would obviously put my partner in the first place if I were with one. If it's offensive to God then why exactly would He pick something as arbitrary and specific as this? I know pornography can come into play but do porn performers feel unloved if someone masturbates to them?
  
• If it's a sin, how bad as a sin is it? Or are all sins equal? I've learned at some point that some sins are mortal, others aren't.
• Do average Christians touch? Or are they being honest when many of them imply or claim they don't?

I think a reason this bothers me so much was that even though I hardly ever masturbated before becoming a Christian, I wasn't worried back then about whether it was a sin or not, it was just a mundane action. But now I can't help bringing God into the equation and only thinking about how MAYBE I lose His love or friendship, but only after doing it.
I'm also worried that this may be something many people must struggle with. But I get the impression that most Christians on the Internet that speak against it sound like they never touch and I feel more alienated from them that way since it just seems unnatural to be able to avoid it unless they are asexual.
I live surrounded by Christians but I'm sure most of them at least have premarital sex. I currently don't and I know I can't judge others but I struggle with accepting that every Christian has their own idea of what's right and wrong. I know that common sense could help understanding if something is a sin, and that knowing if you can "do it in the name of God" or "for the Grace of God" can also help, but neither of these apply directly to masturbation. Common sense tells me masturbation is at least healthy (doctors say it) and the other part is just too vague. I know people as friends don't mind if their friends touch in private and Jesus refers to Himself as a friend who just asks us to love each other.

Thanks a lot in advance for any answers!!
God bless.

Its not about the masturbation that is bad, its the lust filled thoughts that go with it that might convict you on judgment day.

If you can find a way to relieve your self with out the lust filled thoughts then you will do just fine in life.

We are to clean our hearts and minds from lust.

My advice? Find a woman then Get married ........

 

[joshua 1 9]

The issue has to do with our imagination, our thoughts and what we look at.

 

[joshua 1 9]

My advice? Find a woman then Get married

I waited 17 years for a wife.

 

[1 John 4:1]

"However, there is one common question that I don't like to answer. It involves the "M" word—masturbation.

One of the reasons I dread this question is because there is no clear answer. I could take the easy road and just say, "If in doubt, don't do it." The fact is that many Christian women touch and feel horribly guilty about it. I've met women who feel more shame about masturbation than they do about having an adulterous affair."
Masturbation: Is It Wrong?

Given this and that a higher percentage of men touch than women (see graphic below) I am pretty confident that a lot of Christian men touch as well.

source: Dear Mona, I touch More Than Once a Day. Am I Normal?

 

[salt-n-light]

I think the first thing you have to face is that you are addicted.

How do I know? Because the anxiety I feel from reading your post is pretty significant. I'm sure there are plenty of scriptures I can quote, and plenty of accounts that proves both that masturbation is ok and masturbation is not ok, I can give all the alternatives in the worlds and all the apps to block it, but the true problem isn't the act itself. The true problem is your anxiety and self-guilt about thoughts that is driving you to that point to act it out.

So in case you've been wondering if you are actually addicted to masturbation, then here is it : you are.

You're not the only one that does this, plenty of other christians have before you, and plenty will after.

So first things first is to not dwell so hard on it, accept what is happening, and then proceed to give it to God and put plans to move forward. Your desire of intimacy and love are not bad desires, it's just that the means of going about it is not pleasing to God. So then its just a matter of addressing why you're gravitating to this mean to get your desires.

The more important question is for you to flush out is why is masturbation a go-to for your stress? What have you been dealing with lately? And what about masturbation is serving as a resolution about it? I think asking those questions and resolving how to move forward is what is going to help you actually heal your heart. But only addressing how to stop masturbating is only scratching the surface for you, as you can easily fall back.

 

[dqhall]

I'm an adult in my mid 20's, I know I'm not the most mature person in the world but I've been struggling with this a lot lately. I'm not addicted to masturbation but I feel like I can't avoid doing it every once in a while, and I think the reason it bothers me so much is because I can't be 100% sure whether it's a sin or not.
If I don't touch like once a week I get too overwhelmed by stress from my everyday life. But if I do touch, I fear that I may be going against God. I know the second is more important but even so it's not easy to control it.
The thing is, I've researched as much as I could but I can't find any scripture that I think is absolutely about this. I've seen Christians quote that part where Jesus talks about "looking at a woman with lust". Or the Onan story. Or some quotes from Paul about how the body is the temple of Christ and self control.
I asked a priest and he told me masturbation IS a sin. But I've also seen Christians on the Internet saying masturbation is the lesser of two evils if it means it can be a release that stops you from commiting a worse sin (like fornication?). Doctors regardless of religion seem to say it's healthy and that it's okay as long as it's not addictive.

So I have a bunch of questions about this subject:

• What scriptures are the most clear about masturbation being a sin (if it is)?
• What did Jesus mean when he said that about looking at a woman with lust? I mean it's quite impossible to never absolutely ever get turned on by someone (unwillingly).
• What is the healthiest alternative to masturbation? I mean I try to distract myself, pray, read the scriptures. But I still get stressed out and weak eventually.
• If it's a sin, why is it a sin? I've been told at some point that a sin is something that means you are not loving someone else (and that you love or unlove God by your actions towards other people). Who isn't loved when you touch? I'm currently single but I would obviously put my partner in the first place if I were with one. If it's offensive to God then why exactly would He pick something as arbitrary and specific as this? I know pornography can come into play but do porn performers feel unloved if someone masturbates to them?
  
• If it's a sin, how bad as a sin is it? Or are all sins equal? I've learned at some point that some sins are mortal, others aren't.
• Do average Christians touch? Or are they being honest when many of them imply or claim they don't?

I think a reason this bothers me so much was that even though I hardly ever masturbated before becoming a Christian, I wasn't worried back then about whether it was a sin or not, it was just a mundane action. But now I can't help bringing God into the equation and only thinking about how MAYBE I lose His love or friendship, but only after doing it.
I'm also worried that this may be something many people must struggle with. But I get the impression that most Christians on the Internet that speak against it sound like they never touch and I feel more alienated from them that way since it just seems unnatural to be able to avoid it unless they are asexual.
I live surrounded by Christians but I'm sure most of them at least have premarital sex. I currently don't and I know I can't judge others but I struggle with accepting that every Christian has their own idea of what's right and wrong. I know that common sense could help understanding if something is a sin, and that knowing if you can "do it in the name of God" or "for the Grace of God" can also help, but neither of these apply directly to masturbation. Common sense tells me masturbation is at least healthy (doctors say it) and the other part is just too vague. I know people as friends don't mind if their friends touch in private and Jesus refers to Himself as a friend who just asks us to love each other.

Thanks a lot in advance for any answers!!
God bless.

Some people fantasized about having sex while masturbating. Thinking about doing sexually immoral acts without the consent of a married partner is a cause of fornication. I think you might feel better about yourself if you do not touch. You might also avoid non-disclosure payments to porn stars, sexually transmitted disease, paternity suits, palimony etc.

Not everyone who thinks about robbing a bank actually robs a bank. It is better to not think about robbing a bank all the time.

People in CF have confessed giving up masturbation, as if it is a bad habit.

Matthew 5:27-28 (World English Bible)
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery;’28 but I tell you that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart."

 

[Anguspure]

The issue has to do with our imagination, our thoughts and what we look at.

Not entirely. Sexually active males have a natural build up of hormone that requires release every few days or it causes stress in the mind and body. This is why Paul instruct married couples not to deny one another.

The key to preventing this build up is to not start in the first place because (notwithstanding a miracle of God or some other medical factor) once that switch is flicked we are designed to be in a healthy sexual marriage with a woman.

If we are not, we are faced with an endless cycle of ups and downs that need to be dealt with for the rest of our lives (again notwithstanding a miracle or some other medical factor).

 

[Phil 1:21]

I asked a priest and he told me masturbation IS a sin.

Ask him to substantiate his belief with scripture. Watch him be unable to do so.

 

[Anguspure]

Ask him to substantiate his belief with scripture. Watch him be unable to do so.

Is it the intent of God that we have solo sex, that we pleasure ourselves and not another?

 

[Phil 1:21]

Is it the intent of God that we have solo sex, that we pleasure ourselves and not another?

That doesn't address my post. Do you have scriptural support for it being sinful?

 

[Anguspure]

That doesn't address my post. Do you have scriptural support for it being sinful?

As for you, be fruitful and increase in number; multiply on the earth and increase upon it.

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.

But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

If masturbation is not a reaction to burning with passion for a relationship thatone cannot attain then I don't know what it is.

Clearly God created sex as a relational and procreative expression between man and woman.

Every sexual act that does not meet this design intent misses the mark of what God created sex for.

 

[Phil 1:21]

As for you, be fruitful and increase in number; multiply on the earth and increase upon it.

People who have children still touch.

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.

But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Married people still touch.

Are you able to find any scriptures claiming that masturbation is a sin?

 

[Anguspure]

People who have children still touch.

Married people still touch.

Nevertheless the design intent is clearly for union in relationship. Those who touch alone in marriage are expressing a damaged marriage relationship.

Are you able to find any scriptures claiming that masturbation is a sin?

No.

But because God has chosen not to condemn something openly does not mean that it meets with His intentions. It is manifestly clear in scripture that the intention of sex is for relationship and procreation between a man and a woman as an expression.

 

[Phil 1:21]

Are you able to find any scriptures claiming that masturbation is a sin?

No.

Thank you. Scripture -- not personal opinion -- is the word of God.

 

[Lots of Questions]

But how are we failing to love our neighbour by masturbating? It's an act that doesn't affect our neighbour since it's done in private (unless it isn't, of course).
Or do you mean we have to love our neighbour through every single act we do? Because that sounds impossible.

 

[Mountainmanbob]

Don't deceive yourself masturbation is a sin.

Remember, God sees what you are doing with that thing.

M-Bob

 

[Lots of Questions]

Don't deceive yourself masturbation is a sin.
Remember, God sees what you are doing with that thing.
M-Bob

But what makes it a sin exactly? Or what specific proof is there that it IS a sin? God sees people have sex too.

 

[Mountainmanbob]

But what makes it a sin exactly? Or what specific proof is there that it IS a sin? God sees people have sex too.

It's a tough one for us old sinners but, after reading through the Bible a few times from what I can see it only says that any type of sex is okay with our wives.

Her playing with that thing versus you playing with that thing are (two different things.)

M-Bob