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Masturbation and Fantasy

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Gamer

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I've come across many different views on masturbation and I find myself once again confused concerning whether or not it is morally wrong.

There are no clear definite references in the bible concerning masturbation, so as such it's difficult to take a clear scriptural stance on the subject. One piece of scripture many people use to qualify it as sinful is Jesus' reference to lusting. In that if you lust after a woman you commit adultery in your heart. I can see how this might be true, if you are married, since lusting after someone who is not your wife is unhealthy. However, I am not married, as such I can't be cheating on my spouse by entertaining such thoughts in my mind. This also leads me to the subject of fantasy, for if I touch about someone who isn't real then how can I be commiting adultery? because all of my energies are aimed at a figment of the imagination.

Could someone please offer me guidance as to whether masturbation is sinful? And whether or not lusting after fictional characters is sinful?
 

Deamiter

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I've never been able to touch without lusting and in talking to Christian friends (in my university) I've never known anybody else to do it either.

If it were possible to touch without the fantasy, it would certainly be quite controversial to me. However, with the data I've got (personal, from friends and professional) I have to conclude that it's not possible and therefore is sinful outside of marriage (I'm not going to go in there).

I truly believe that Jesus meant that lusting is adultary whether you are married or not. This isn't because of some technical/literal argument that you are cheating on your future wife. It's simply because lust builds up habits that are sinful.

People who touch often see women more and more with a connection to pleasure, not worth as a human or even as a woman (a large Church I'm connected with has quite a few support groups for sexual addiction so I'm not speaking blindly). Your fantasies spill over into how you think in everyday life! This is something that's very normal. We're wired (as humans) to relate our fantasies and imagination to real life. That's why we have art and highways and spaceships!

Along with this, though, comes an inability to totally separate fantasy and reality. When or if you get married, your fantasy won't simply turn into love for your wife. You'll retain the fantasy which can seriously end up hurting your wife much later on as you've trained yourself to have sex with your fantasy rather than with your wife. I'm not free of sexual sin by a long shot, but I've also talked with people who HAVE been deeply hurt by it (both men and their wives) and I can come to no other conclusion than that Jesus wants me to fight sexual addiction and sin just as I fight my other issues in His name.

I also believe that the ACT of having sex (not simply intercourse) is sinful outside of marriage. I've sinned here too and I think it's pretty clear that sex does not simply equal intercourse. The sexual act (and release) in masturbation is the essence of sex -- exactly what God wants you to save (as much as possible in my case) for marriage.
 
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Mr.Cheese

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It happens. Looking back I don't think you guys (gender inclusive) should exhaust all of your energies on this. I don't think it's a big deal. But, like anything else, it's not good to let something control you to the point that all you can think about is the next chance you will ahve to do it. That's not healthy.
 
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Colossians3

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I strongly recommend Joshua Harris' book about lust, Not Even a Hint. It covers all the topics of lust, including masturbation - both in marriage and alone. If you'd rather not read it (though I assure you, you're really missing out), I could sum up the bit that may help you. Just let me know. Feel free to PM me, too.

My opinion - masturbation is always wrong, no matter the situation.
 
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cwr89

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well, I in fact have wondered the exact same thing actually,

as far as fanasy, yes I have had them before too, I feel that it must be triggered by a memory of something you have seen or done.
also, I am not married, I have though how could it be a sin, you know I am not even thinking of girls or anything when I am masturbating. (well thats just a few times) I don't know for me, I guess I do it because, the devil has me gripped and is feeding me a lie, the lie that I will never have a girl to hold for my own. I am 15 and I have been rejected by every girl I have ever asked out. so thats a bummer.

I think you have rasied a good question. I don't have an answer and I don't think anyone else does eather.

~Casey
 
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Sam Gamgee

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I'm not convinced that masturbation is a sin, even when people like Cherub8 state it so emphatically.

Our minds are a tricky thing. Nobody understands how our thoughts and desires work. Nobody understand why a sexual fantasy for you may be repulsive to me, and vice-versa.

It's all up to what you are comfortable with and how your relationship with Jesus is. Fact is, we all have a different relationship with God. And for some of us, masturbation is a sin, and for others, masturbation is not a sin.

In the end, we all have to make our own choices, based on the best information we have available.
 
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HomeChicklet

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Well I too have wondered this. I have also done some research on it and come to find out it is pretty proven that you cant touch without fantasizing. I know from personal experince that when i am partaking in masturbation I often think of the guys that I have allowed to go to a certian point with me. I think on that and its a memory.

My opion on weither its a sin or not goes like this. In masturbating it causes you to lust, correct? Well in that case it causes you to stumble in your Christian walk and stops you from being fully devouted to God. Therefore that makes it the sin. Maybe not the act of masturbation is the sin but its all the other stuff that comes with it. I mean look at it... once masturbation isn't as satisfing you start to look for more. So you add in more lust and fantasy then you did to start with. Eventually I think it will cause you to go further with a boyfriend/girlfriend. I think you just really have to think about six questions These are 7 questions I apply to my life a lot and they have really helped me wok through this and a lot of other things. They have also helped me become more of a disciple for Christ.

These 7 questions I am going to list and answer them to the best of my ability to apply to this situation.

1) Can I witness while doing this?
Well obviously we can't. Jesus wants our number one priorty to be Him. He wants us to go out into the world and make disciples in His name. That was His very las commandment to us. We need to remember that partaking in masturbation doesn't allow us to do this simply because after a while it will begin to control your body mind and heart.
2) Is it forbiden?
The Bible doesn't clearly answer this question but some of the things that comes with masturbation (lust, fantasizing, dirty thoughts,ect) that is forbiden to the child of God. I think that is something we have to remember
3) Will it lead to temptation?
I think as we all know that when we try to stop this act we are just tempted over and over again to do it. I think that clearly states that this is a temptaion and well the devil will use it to tempt us to go further the next time we are alone with our bf or gf. I speak from experince.
4) Will it harm my body?
It doesn't harm our physical body depending on the way you go about it. What it does harm is our mind and the way we see things. It allows in some unpure thoughts and unpure actions. It also harms the body of Christ.
5) Will it hinder my christian growth?
It will. It stops you from being able to keep your mind fully focused on being all God wants you to be. It causes us to sin and it causes us harm. I think that this really does hinder our growth. It limits us and keeps us from being able to fully offer up all of us to God.
6) Will it hurt others?
It potentially could if you tell them about it and they begin to do it. Then they are limited in who they can be in God and they are partaking in sin. It will definetly stop them from being able to be all that they can be as a person.
7) Will it please and glorify Christ?
No it doesn't. Christ wants us to dedicate ourselves to him in our fullness. We are talking about sexual purity in youth on wednesdays and in there our youth pastor challenged us to dedicate our temples which is our mind body and soul because now that we are saved the Holy Spirit lives within us. Therefore when we partake in the act of masturbation we are doing that with what is like Jesus standing right beside us.

That is as well answered as I could get them. I think that one other thing you could remind yourself of to get past masturbation is "Would I want to be caught doing this when Jesus comes back for His people" That question alone has help me get through a lot and work past a lot more. I think its really important for us to remember these things. I hope this helps.

Feel free to PM me if you have any questions.

In Christ,
Mandy
 
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janny108

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Hi, has anyone here ever fantasized about certain stars? Not always leading to sexual thoughts. My husband is a good provider now, but he does not take intiative for a lot of things, and plus he smells since he uses beer and cigarettes although he has been advised by the doctor not to smoke.
I'm not getting the affection I'd like. I consider myself a strong person, but within the last year or so I QUIT masturbation! I no longer read romance novels or look at romance movies, so I'm making progress. But I STILL romanticize I guess about some stars though, and sometimes those are lustful thoughts.

Like if you've done this, what do you put in your mind to think about esp at night??

thanks
Jan
 
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TheMainException

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HomeChicklet said:
1) Can I witness while doing this?
Well obviously we can't. Jesus wants our number one priorty to be Him. He wants us to go out into the world and make disciples in His name. That was His very las commandment to us. We need to remember that partaking in masturbation doesn't allow us to do this simply because after a while it will begin to control your body mind and heart.

Can you witness while having sex with your spouse either?

2) Is it forbiden?
The Bible doesn't clearly answer this question but some of the things that comes with masturbation (lust, fantasizing, dirty thoughts,ect) that is forbiden to the child of God. I think that is something we have to remember
3) Will it lead to temptation?
I think as we all know that when we try to stop this act we are just tempted over and over again to do it. I think that clearly states that this is a temptaion and well the devil will use it to tempt us to go further the next time we are alone with our bf or gf. I speak from experince.
But will sex with your spouse lead you to tempation? Where is the difference???
4) Will it harm my body?
It doesn't harm our physical body depending on the way you go about it. What it does harm is our mind and the way we see things. It allows in some unpure thoughts and unpure actions. It also harms the body of Christ.
What about people who don't exist that you have fantasies about? And what if you never masterbated in your life (theoretically speaking), and you think this way about your spouse? Is that wrong???
5) Will it hinder my christian growth?
It will. It stops you from being able to keep your mind fully focused on being all God wants you to be. It causes us to sin and it causes us harm. I think that this really does hinder our growth. It limits us and keeps us from being able to fully offer up all of us to God.
Is touching yourself a sin? And what about fantasies of people who don't exist???


((((Yes, I did leave out a section, I did not have a comment or find it necessary for what I am saying))))

7) Will it please and glorify Christ?
No it doesn't. Christ wants us to dedicate ourselves to him in our fullness. We are talking about sexual purity in youth on wednesdays and in there our youth pastor challenged us to dedicate our temples which is our mind body and soul because now that we are saved the Holy Spirit lives within us. Therefore when we partake in the act of masturbation we are doing that with what is like Jesus standing right beside us.
Does sex please and glorify God? What is so wrong with touching yourself if it does and if not, why not???

........."Would I want to be caught doing this when Jesus comes back for His people" ......[/QUOTE] Would you want to be caught having sex with your spouse when he comes back???



Not necessarily questions you need to answer....just something to think about.
 
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HomeChicklet

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LAWise520 said:
[/color]
Can you witness while having sex with your spouse either?

But will sex with your spouse lead you to tempation? Where is the difference???
What about people who don't exist that you have fantasies about? And what if you never masterbated in your life (theoretically speaking), and you think this way about your spouse? Is that wrong???
Is touching yourself a sin? And what about fantasies of people who don't exist???


((((Yes, I did leave out a section, I did not have a comment or find it necessary for what I am saying))))

Does sex please and glorify God? What is so wrong with touching yourself if it does and if not, why not???

........."Would I want to be caught doing this when Jesus comes back for His people" ......
Would you want to be caught having sex with your spouse when he comes back???



Not necessarily questions you need to answer....just something to think about.[/QUOTE]

Think of this... God created sex for MAN and WIFE. Therefore sex with your spouse is not a sin. I believe masturbation causes you to be sexually immoral. Its juist my personal belief and I don't want this to become a debating issue. Yes you can witness by having sex with your spouse as long as they are the only one you are having sex with. Maybe not currently in the action that question means while i am partaking in this when no one is looking can i witness Everyone is tempted... when you have that spouse that its okay to have sex with you won't be as tempted to act on the temptations to be untrue. Will fantasizing about someone who doesn't exist cause you to become disappointed when you get married and see that your fantasy isn't all it seemed? God gave the gift of sex for man and wife to share. He wants us to reproduce. He also gave us that for it to be something we shared specifically between us and our spouse alone. That is why purity is so important. I believe masturbation is a sin when it causes you to slip in your walk with Christ. It isn't a sin if it doesn't harm your walk. I believe that firmly. When masturbation becomes a constant thought and you get to the point you cant wait for your next chance for it I believe then it becomes a sin. This is because you are putting something before you chance you have right in front of you to be a witness to someone. Just some thoughts back to you... and as far as having sex with my spouse when Jesus comes back.. I wouldn't be ashamed because my spouse is the person I am too share that gift with and sharing it with our spouse isn't something to be ashamed of.

In Christ
Mandy
 
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lionman

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I'm not sold on masturbating alone being a sin. Obviously, if you're fantasizing about someone while you're doing it, then it is a sin. But doing it just to relieve stress, or letting out sexual tension I believe is not a sin. We live in a society where we are constantly bombarded by a bunch of junk. I am a 23-year old virgin who hopes to stay that way until my wedding night, but I also think that God gave me a strong sex drive and if I didn't touch I think I would go crazy. I hope you all understand where I'm coming from?
 
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chilibowl

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Regardless if it's a sin or not, you are unsure in your heart. Any advise given here will be just that advise. not a reason to cut loose. Paul told the Romans if your full of the faith then you may eat all things, but to the one who doubts then he's to only eat veggies.. I know that has no direct application to "waxing your car" or masturbation, but the principal applies. In the letter to the romans paul was saying it's lawful to eat or partake in what once was a forbidden food.. unless you were unsure then it was a sin.. The actually act of eating "meat" was lawful so by what was written whether you knew it or not you were ok by the scriptures!..unless you take in account what paul says in 14:2 of his letter, by just not knowing made the "Act" of eating certain meat a sin. I guess the principal is even if you do something lawful or written by god and do it "Without knowledge/faith" that makes a sin... So even if Romans had an extra chapter devoted to liberating the act of masturbation, gave rules and laws about what you can or can't view or fantasize about and you didn't know of it...Well, It would be just as sinful as what your doing now! Like I said in the beginning of this post "all of these post are just merely reflections of the faith of others "Advise" And you will be continuing in sin "Per: paul romans 14" until you can in faith defend or deny your acts...

Good luck and God bless!
 
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Niels

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Fantasizing about someone who's not real, and/or just a figment of your imagination.

This is something that's always perplexed me. I'm creative, and can visualize a woman who I've never seen or met, without much difficulty. For a long time I thought this was evil, and really struggled with feelings of guilt. However, it's saved me from much of the heartache I see around me. And if I find a spouse who's also creative, I doubt she'll mind. After all, I can't accurately fantasize about her, sice we may have never met. In the worst case senerio, I may never meet her... however, I'm very energized when it comes to sexual things, so if I didn't have some sort of release, I'd probably be even more depressed.

So far, I've taken the view that it's fine to fantasize about an otherwise godly relationship, so long as the lust isn't after an actual woman. If the fantasy's about something that would be pleasing to God if within the bounds of what you and your wife might do, I say it's probably OK.
 
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Intrepid99

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To those who think masturbatio is not a sin.


"Uh.... not again."

Even if that is your reaction, you have to read this.

I know that this topic is being floating around for a long time. There must be an end to it. I will paste two articles on this subject from two matured Christians.



There is an untruth floating around Christian circles that masturbation is not a sin and that it is acceptable under certain circumstances. Some believe that masturbation is acceptable:



1—For single people



2—For married people who have to endure prolonged absences from their spouse



3—As a preventative to the commitment of sexual crimes



One of the course members from The Freedom Course recently sent us an article written by a pastor on the subject of masturbation. In his article, this pastor unhesitatingly recommended masturbation for people of all ages to "release stress for singles”, to “relieve pressure when away from a spouse”, and to "prevent sex crimes." He also gave instructions on how to teach masturbation to young children and blatantly stated that God gave masturbation to us as a way "to enjoy sex before marriage."



I wish this pastor could see some of the enrollments we receive from people who have become enslaved to gratifying their flesh by the act of masturbation--many without pornography! They are slaves to their own lusts; unable to break free from this debilitating habit that has crippled their walk with the Lord. Because they are unable to stop this behavior, they are guilty and some feel ashamed and frustrated. They have "low self-esteem" and have difficulty interacting in social situations because they know they have a secret—a dark secret that they are slaves to fondling themselves, caressing themselves, and to [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. Moreover, I wish this pastor could watch as God sets these captives free from masturbation and read their emails stating how depression, paranoia, stress...etc. disappeared when God set them free from masturbation and sexual impurity of all kinds.



Some Christians believe that because masturbation is not specifically mentioned in the Bible that God does not consider the presence or the absence of the activity important. But is this really accurate? Is God truly silent about masturbation? Is the absence of the word “masturbation” in Scripture God’s way of giving His approval to men and women gratifying their flesh in masturbation? Remember, the word "pornography" itself is not in the Bible (though the root word is), but there are biblical principles dealing with both pornography and masturbation.



Though it is true that the Bible does not use the word "masturbation”, I do not believe that Scripture has left us in the dark about whether masturbation is right or wrong. Masturbation is not a "gift of God" for single people and it is not a "preventative for sexual crimes." It is indulging the flesh, which leads to sin-slavery (John 8:34). Masturbation makes us begin to live according to the dictates of the flesh and to become slaves to the "misdeeds of the body." Scripture warns us about this kind of activity, "For if you live according to the flesh (by giving in to it's desires), you will die" and tells us how to stop, "but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live" (Romans 8:13). In reality, masturbation is a high expression of loving self and of sexual self-idolatry. It is deceiving and enslaving. Let us see these truths from Scripture:



"Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness. 20 When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness" (Romans 6:19-20).

This verse teaches, "offering leads to slavery." When we "offer the parts of our body" to sin we become a slave to sin. Masturbation only "relieves the pressure" temporarily. The pressure will soon be back and masturbation will need to occur again and again, and again. But if we offer the parts of our body for righteousness, we will become slaves of righteousness. So, present your body a living sacrifice; offer the parts of your body to God and your slavery to Christ will produce complete freedom from masturbation.



Another argument that some make in favor of masturbation is to say that it is much like eating food: if we indulge ourselves we can become slaves, but what we need to do is learn to control our appetite, not stop eating. So, in the same way, we need to control masturbation and not become slaves to it, but it is not sin to touch anymore than it is sin to eat. But there is a major problem with this argument: eating is a biological necessity. If we don't eat, we die. Sex is a biological desire, not a necessity. Many people live their whole lives without ever having sex.



"Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires" (Romans 8:5).

Masturbation fixes the mind on the desires of the flesh, and burns the image of nudity and sex into the mind. With each occurrence of masturbation, that image becomes clearer and more intense, and can become a tool of the devil to set up a thought-stronghold (2 Corinthians 10:3-5).



"So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God" (Romans 8:8)

Here is the real problem of masturbation, and let me say this clearly: If you are masturbating, you are pleasing only yourself. Your actions are displeasing to God because you are "in the flesh" and a slave to lust. You are offering the members of your body in slavery to impurity and your mind is set on what the flesh desires.



· "So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want"(Galatians 5:16-17).



Why is masturbation a sin? It is a sin because when we touch we "gratify the desires of the flesh," which we would not do if we were walking in and living by the Spirit. Let us make this point clear. If we are walking in the Spirit and living by faith, we will not touch.



"So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. 23 But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin" (Romans 14:23).

Masturbation is a sin because it does not come from faith. I cannot believe the promises of God to supply my every need (Phil. 4:19), to make a way out of every temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13), to keep me from falling (Jude 24), and touch at the same time. Masturbation is not of faith therefore it is sin.



About Jesus Christ, God the Father says, "This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased." And why? Because He lived a life of obedience unto death, even death on a cross. And we are unworthy to be called His disciples unless we daily take up the cross and follow Him. Taking up our cross means sacrificing our flesh, not gratifying it. It means dying to self, not living to please the flesh. Oh, how we need the teaching of the cross of Jesus Christ in these instances. The cross shows us One Whose flesh was crucified, not controlled. The cross shows us that we are not to "relieve the pressure" but endure to the point of shedding blood. Stating that masturbation is acceptable "under certain circumstances" is a denial of the cross of Jesus Christ. And the truth of the matter is that it is so much easier to totally crucify than to attempt to control.



Right here let me quote from an excellent book from Pure Life Ministries on the subject of masturbation called Tearing Down The Walls Of Sexual Idolatry by Steve Gallagher. This book is highly recommended for its commitment to the truth of Scripture, rather than to worldly principles. In fact, Pure Life Ministries considers their ministry to be "an alternative to psychology." They say, "Some of the leading Christian psychologists in the nation have said that masturbation is a normal function and unless carried on into marriage, usually proves to be harmless. I believe the reason that they have said this is to alleviate some of the guilt and condemnation associated with it. But you cannot condone something because it makes people feel guilty. It may be normal for fallen man, but that does not make it acceptable in the eyes of a holy God. Although masturbation is not specifically addressed in Scripture, the Bible gives us principles for leading a pure and holy life that clearly tells us that it is wrong.



Proper Sex--The first and most obvious reason that masturbation is wrong is because it goes against God's purpose for sex. Although our society has perverted sex to the extent that it has become a self-centered act, God created it to be a function of marriage. There is no room for sex outside of marriage! Worldly-minded teachers tell us though, that we have pent-up desires that must be 'relieved.' They say that God created us to need sex and would not expect us to go without it. What they do not realize is that sex is a desire that God gave us; not a need. People that have learned to walk in the Spirit have been overcoming these desires for thousands of years.

Feeding The Flesh--Another reason why masturbation is wrong is because it is another form of self-gratification. Throughout Scripture, self-gratification is denounced.

Lustful Fantasy--It is virtually impossible to touch without fantasizing. What would a person think about who is trying to achieve [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] if not sex with some person? Paul admonishes us about our thinking when he says, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things" (Philippians 4:8).

Doorway To Other Sin--The last reason that masturbation is wrong is that it opens the door for the enemy to lead the person deeper into sin. As will be discussed later in the book, sin is never satisfied. It always demands more and more of the person. As God told Cain, 'Sin is crouching at the door, and its desire is for you, but you must master it' (Genesis 4:7).”

So, let us get practical on this subject. Many of us have children coming into puberty and we know they will touch. How do we converse with them on this topic? First, let us instruct them about the cross. I tell my son that Jesus Christ laid down His life for us, and He requires us to lay down our lives also. He presented His body as an offering to the Father and we can, by the power of the Holy Spirit, offer our bodies a living sacrifice. We talk about Jesus refusing to gratify His flesh when tempted by the devil, and that His flesh was nailed to a cross. In the same way we should count ourselves dead to sin. I talk plainly with him about the enslavement that masturbation will bring, if he were to offer the members of his body for sin. I tell him that the desires he has are given by God to experience pleasure in marriage, and to procreate, not for selfish reasons. He understands that to follow Christ masturbation is not an option. It makes it so much easier on him, when the temptation comes, to not even consider it as a possibility, rather than try to decide if this is a time it must be "controlled" or if can he give in to the desire.



Finally, let me finish with a testimony we received awhile back. It is from a gentleman in his last week of The Freedom Course and he is now set free from slavery to masturbation. He writes this testimony:



"My problems began when our youth pastor told me that the Bible does not mention masturbation, therefore God must not condemn it. He told us that as long as we were masturbating with thoughts of our future spouse then we were not sinning. My masturbation began slowly---only using it once a week or so. I felt guilty, like I was giving in to sin rather than denying the flesh, but my pastor said it was a helpful tool, and that it even prevented sex crimes when used correctly. Gullible as I was I believed him. I soon began discovering that offering the parts of my body to masturbation did not permanently decrease desire or relieve pressure--quite the opposite--the more I masturbated the more I enjoyed it and the more I engaged in it. I honestly do not know what happened--one day I had just finished masturbating along side a farm road, for the 3rd time that day, when it dawned on me that I was a slave to masturbation. What started innocently, and with the full approval of a religious authority, trapped me into a vice that completely choked out all spiritual life in me.



Oh how I wish that pastor had preached the Word correctly, even if it would have made him less popular. I wish he had explained to me that unless I denied myself (not indulged myself) and took up my cross daily I would not be worthy to be His disciple. I wish he had told me about the principle of slavery--that we are slaves to whatever we offer ourselves to. I wish he had told me, plain and simple, that it is so much easier to totally and completely refuse masturbation--that it is not even an option for a Christian--than to attempt to "control it" and "only use it under certain circumstances." If only he had not used that worn-out phrase "the Bible doesn't mention it" and instead taught the principles of Scripture. I am not blaming him; my own deceptive heart loved hearing what he preached, and I am responsible for my own actions. I just wish I would have had a man of God who could have helped me learn to deny and crucify rather than rationalize and justify."



Another enrollment in The Freedom Course came in right as we were finishing this article. This 17-year-old young man writes:



"Every time I get the urge I can't resist masturbation...I have tried to fight it for many years, and, although I have had a few temporary victories, I never completely defeated it. I desire to live all of my life for Christ, and this can't be done until I defeat this fiend. I also want to remain pure for my future wife, and if I continue down this path I know that wish will not become true."



Masturbation is a doorway to slavery! May God grant this young man freedom in Christ.



May God give us all grace to choose to please the Lord by offering our bodies a living sacrifice rather than pleasing ourselves through masturbation.



grace,

Mike Cleveland
settingcaptivesfree.com
 
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Intrepid99

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Whats Wrong with Masturbation?





WHAT'S WRONG WITH MASTURBATION?

BY STEVE GALLAGHER

Some of the leading Christian psychologists in the nation have said
that masturbation is a normal function and unless carried on into
marriage, usually proves to be harmless. I believe the reason they
have said this is to alleviate some of the guilt and condemnation
associated with it. But you cannot condone something because it
makes people feel guilty. God gave us guilt feelings for much the
same reason He gave us the sense of pain: it lets us know when we
are doing something wrong that is going to hurt us.

You also cannot condone masturbation because everybody does it. We
are sinners by nature and it is natural for us to sin. But just
because masturbation is normal for fallen man, that does not make it
acceptable in the eyes of a holy God.

Although masturbation isn't specifically addressed in Scripture, the
Bible gives us principles for leading a pure and holy life that
clearly point to the wrongness of it.

Proper Sex
The first and most obvious reason that masturbation is wrong is
because it goes against God's purpose for sex. Although our society
has perverted sex to the extent that it has become a self-centered
act, God created it to be a function of marriage. There is no room
for sex outside of marriage.

Worldly minded teachers tell us though, that we have pent-up desires
that must be "relieved." They say that God created us to need sex
and wouldn't expect us to go without it. What they don't realize is
that sex is a desire that God gave us; not a need. People who have
learned to walk in the Spirit, have been overcoming these desires for
thousands of years.

Also, Paul gave the answer to this problem when he said "if they
cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to
marry than to burn with passion." It is clear by his words here that
Scripture gives only two alternatives to this problem. The person
must either exercise self control or they must marry. God doesn't
allow sin as a third alternative.

Feeding The Flesh
Another reason we know that masturbation is wrong is because it is
another form of self-gratification. Throughout Scripture self-
gratification is denounced. Over and over again we are told how
important it is that we don't allow the flesh to dominate our
thinking or our actions. The following verses are but two that deal
with this:

For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the
Spirit is life and peace, because the mind set on the flesh is
hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of
God, for it is not even able to do so; and those who are in the
flesh cannot please God. (Romans 8:6-8)

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire
of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and
the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one
another, so that you may not do the things that you please . . . .
Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality,
impurity, sensuality, idolatry . . . . (Galatians 5:16-20)

Lustful Fantasy
It is virtually impossible to touch without fantasizing. What
would a person think about who is trying to achieve [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] if not sex
with some person? Not meaning to be flippant -- but could you
imagine thinking about fixing the refrigerator while masturbating?
Of course not! People who touch must lust over another person
to be able to achieve an [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. Jesus said,

You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I
tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already
committed adultery with her in his heart.

Doorway To Other Sin
One of the consequences to a habit of masturbation is that it opens
the door for the enemy to lead the person deeper into sin. Sin is
never satisfied; it always demands more and more of the person. As
God told Cain, "sin is crouching at the door, and its desire is for
you, but you must master it."

The habit of masturbation sets in motion a mentality of giving in to
the demands of the flesh that is often carried on into other sins.
The person literally gets "in the habit" of caving in to every carnal
temptation and desire. As the person fills his mind with fantasies
of having sex with other people, he is deepening the carnal thought
that the worth of women is to be found in their sexuality. This
thinking process leads the person deeper and deeper into sin.

Being Controlled By Sin
Another biblical reason why masturbation is wrong is the way that it
masters people. It is a habit that controls people. Christians
should not be controlled by anything, except a love for Christ. Paul
said that we should not be mastered by anything. Masturbation is a
dominating habit that tends to control the person.

But more than just that, it is also a matter of aligning ourselves
with the sinful domain of the enemy. Paul spoke of the choice we
have about who we will serve:

Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body that you should
obey its lusts, and do not go on presenting the members of your body
to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; . . . . Do you not know
that when you present yourselves to someone as slaves for obedience,
you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin resulting in
death, or of obedience resulting in righteousness? (Romans 6:12-13;
16)

Masturbation is nothing short of lust-filled self-gratification. It
is the epitome of self-centeredness and is wrong for the Christian.
If you are struggling with a habit of masturbation, please understand
that even though it is wrong, that doesn't mean that God doesn't love
you or won't help you change.

Those feeling intense condemnation should know that the Lord never
condemns those He loves. Satan is the accuser of the brethren and
the one who tries to make people feel condemned. Those who have done
things like cutting off their hands or other body parts can attest to
the harshness of Satan's condemnation.

The Holy Spirit, on the other hand, is always a "Gentleman." He
quietly and lovingly convicts us of our sin and nudges us toward
heart-felt repentance.

The Adolescent
When a parent finds out that his child or teenager has become
involved with masturbation, he should be careful as to how to deal
with it.

Most children have a natural curiosity about their own sexuality.
Exploring oneself is a normal part of growing up. The best thing a
parent can do about this is to patiently watch to see if it develops
into a real problem. If it is just curiosity, it should run it
course before long.

If a young person seems to be developing a habit of masturbation, it
would be best to have a talk with them about it. It's important that
you don't condemn them for their behavior. This is actually a great
opportunity to show him your friendship. Have a friend to friend
talk with him about it. Address it in as non-threatening manner as
possible. After your talk, spend time in prayer together -- seeking
God for His strength and help to overcome this habit. You can't
expect a child to react to a problem with sin in the same way as a
mature Christian adult.

An important thing to note at this point also is that you teach your
children values in life through your own life. If your life revolves
around pleasure-seeking activities -- even if they have nothing to do
with sex -- your child is going to learn that this is what life is
all about.

On the other hand, if your life revolves around the things of God,
your child is going to see spiritual things as the important things
to pursue in life. The best thing you can do to prepare your
children for a godly life in a wicked world is to live a godly
lifestyle yourself.
 
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DawnTillery

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I have to agree here. Masturbation alone, I dont think is a sin either. What about couples that use masturbation as their only way. There are people out here that go through things where they are not having sexual relations with their spouse because of reasons beyond their control. I cant see how masturbation as a release would be wrong. What if they are thinking about their SPOUSE when they are masturbating? Masturbating is NOT sex.
The actual THOUGHT of Lust is not a sin, its the dwelling upon it that makes it a sin.. NOONE here can tell me they never thought or looked..
Isnt it like a man has so many thoughts every minute? I dont know what the statistics are for women.

If the act of masturbation makes u feel guilty then possibly for you it is wrong, BUT Remember what ROMANS 14 says.
Let every man be fully persuaded in his OWN mind.




lionman said:
I'm not sold on masturbating alone being a sin. Obviously, if you're fantasizing about someone while you're doing it, then it is a sin. But doing it just to relieve stress, or letting out sexual tension I believe is not a sin. We live in a society where we are constantly bombarded by a bunch of junk. I am a 23-year old virgin who hopes to stay that way until my wedding night, but I also think that God gave me a strong sex drive and if I didn't touch I think I would go crazy. I hope you all understand where I'm coming from?
 
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