I am depressed about my struggles with finding a job, moving out, and starting my life.

[Sara50840]

I recently graduated college and am ready for a full-time job. I want to move out of my parents' house and start living my life. I have been searching for jobs for months, I have interviewed with some, but ultimately get rejected again and again. I knew my field (film/media/design) would be competitive, but I am losing hope. I can feel myself becoming depressed. Here are some things I am depressed about:

1) Finding a good job in my field that will actually hire me. I have come so close on multiple occasions but always end up losing to another candidate. I have applied to over 250 jobs this year. Now anytime I look at a job listing, they become less and less appealing to me. Are the good jobs all gone now, or do I have a "perfect" job in my mind that I keep searching for and cannot find? I don't want to settle for something that will make me miserable, but am I deluding myself?

2) Finding a good job in my field that actually pays me enough. Today's financial situation is terrifying. I look around at the prices of rent/groceries/etc. in the areas that I am applying, and the only jobs that actually get back with me won't pay me enough to actually survive. How am I supposed to live? And when I do find a job posting that pays enough, I either lose the opportunity to a "more-qualified" candidate, or I'm rejected from the start for not having enough experience.

3) Imposter syndrome. Job postings have an extensive laundry list of everything they are looking for in a candidate. I don't measure up. I don't have enough experience because I haven't lived long enough to earn it. Everyone is looking for an expert and no one wants to take a chance on the college graduate that could bring in a fresh perspective and a willingness to learn.

4) Seeing others succeed where I've failed. LinkedIn is a horrible place for my mental health. I'm on it a lot because that's how I find jobs, but I see endless posts on the site where all of my former classmates have already found jobs and are 10x better than me. I'll just be scrolling through social media and see other people excelling at what I want to do. I want to see them as an inspiration for what I could become, but instead I think "they're so much better than me, so why should I even try? I'll never be that good."

I have literally spent my whole life leading up to this moment. I have nothing else to shoot for. Getting a career job was my ultimate goal, and I was just going to figure everything out from there. I'm trying to tell myself that I'm constantly being rejected because God has a different plan for me, and I just haven't found it yet. I just don't feel Him working in my life. I just want Him to tell me what to do, because I feel so lost.

In addition to that, my parents are mad because I don't contribute enough to the household. I get it, and I don't do much. I occasionally cook and clean, but I mostly sit around and watch TV and scroll through my phone because it makes me forget about how lost I feel. I'm trying to tell them that I have trouble even getting out of the bed in the morning because there's really no point. I have nothing to look forward to, just the looming nothingness in my future. I am so afraid that I won't amount to anything in life, that I'll have no purpose. And they don't understand how much I'm hurting. They just want me to "stop being lazy."

I'm trying to find ways to make money in everything I do. I have some hobby social media accounts that are actually performing very well, so I am trying to find a way to turn that into a job somehow. But instead I feel like I'm bothering my followers because I'm constantly worrying about money. Not to mention the fact that I've run into a glitch roadblock that keeps me from actually monetizing my accounts.

I'm trying to revisit some old abandoned projects. Maybe if I finish that screenplay I abandoned in college, I can finally work up the momentum to write more and develop something actually worth selling. I do have random spurts of motivation here and there, but it isn't substantial. My motivation quickly fades away and doesn't return for a long time.

I pray and pray, but I don't hear God answering me. I don't know what to do.

If y'all would please pray for me, I'd appreciate it. I'm also open to any advice you may have about my situation.

 

[Tolworth John]

Finding a good job in my field that actually pays me enough.

May I suggest a couple of things.

Why not seek to get a job, any job in your chosen field.
Emloyers always want experience, so as you can't offer them a top of the range set of qualifcations aim lower, get work experience and go from there.
( sorry but I've assumed that your qualifcations are not the highest, if I'm wrong I apologise. )

Get any job, being at work beats being unemployed, its better for all our mental health, it enables one to contribute to your home as well as shows employers you are proactive.

 

[Sara50840]

May I suggest a couple of things.

Why not seek to get a job, any job in your chosen field.
Emloyers always want experience, so as you can't offer them a top of the range set of qualifcations aim lower, get work experience and go from there.
( sorry but I've assumed that your qualifcations are not the highest, if I'm wrong I apologise. )

Get any job, being at work beats being unemployed, its better for all our mental health, it enables one to contribute to your home as well as shows employers you are proactive.

I do have part-time jobs in the field, but they have no opportunities for advancement. One is the videographer and media specialist at my church, and the other is a scriptwriting position with a YouTube channel. I like to think I have actually done a lot in my field and have a very sizable portfolio, but this is still not enough for many employers.

Right now I’ve just been doing those two things while focusing on the job search. They don’t pay much but they do cover some bills. I quit my retail job a few months ago because I was just going through the motions there and I felt that it was holding me back from finding a job in my field. Plus the work environment was not very good.

 

[ElCamino]

Have you considered blogging? You can write about the things you studied. You can monetize the blog in different ways and you can even create connections that can land you a good job down the line.

It can take a while before you see results though. I just started my first blog a few months ago and I'm only starting to see some results. You mentioned you already have a social media presence, so that could speed up the process for sure.

Let me know if you need help getting started.

 

[Sara50840]

Have you considered blogging? You can write about the things you studied. You can monetize the blog in different ways and you can even create connections that can land you a good job down the line.

It can take a while before you see results though. I just started my first blog a few months ago and I'm only starting to see some results. You mentioned you already have a social media presence, so that could speed up the process for sure.

Let me know if you need help getting started.

This sounds like something I may be interested in. How would I go about it?

 

[Veloman]

Have you considered blogging? You can write about the things you studied. You can monetize the blog in different ways and you can even create connections that can land you a good job down the line.

It can take a while before you see results though. I just started my first blog a few months ago and I'm only starting to see some results. You mentioned you already have a social media presence, so that could speed up the process for sure.

Let me know if you need help getting started.

This is VERY good advice, right here! I am about to launch a blog just because I like to write for fun, but don't think for a minute that I wont eventually be making money from it. I suggest doing an online search for the following phrases: "blog seo 2023", "blog best practices", "what every blog needs", "how to monetize a blog", "how to write quality content for blogs".
You might consider podcasting as a means of income as well. One fact concerning any online medium used to make money is this: it will take time, but even more effort. If you aren't fully invested in at least a weekly new blog article/podcast, don't expect to grow a large base of followers.
In the meantime if you want to make some serious cash for a minimal investment, look at working an entry-level position in a skilled trade. Most will start you out with no experience at around $15.00/hour. Grossing $600.00/week with no experience is nothing to laugh at. You could easily max out a Roth IRA and not even miss the money. If your in your twenties, starting a Roth NOW will make it very easy to retire a millionaire--even on a modest 5-figure income.
One more word of advice: don't dabble in doing a little bit of everything. Instead, focus on a job and a blog, or a job and a podcast--and do them both very well. Watching tv all the time will also lead to regret down the road. You don't want to be the one who WATCHED others doing things when you could have DONE them. The whole Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is a myth created by the media to keep you hooked on social media and video/audio entertainment so you will keep seeing their ads, and buying their products. FOMO is diabolical and a fraud. If you put down your phone, and shut off anything with a screen, you will discover that you have all the time in the world to pursue whatever goals you want. Time will slow down, days will get longer (even if you're busy), and your life will be so much richer. Screen withdrawl is very hard at first, so you have to treat it like a drug addiction and be resolute in staying away from it. FOMO naturally will set in like, "I'm missing my favorite shows!!!". No, you're really not. You're missing what the media's elite have conditioned you to become addicted to. After a month it gets real easy, especially if you have found other things to do like learning a musical instrument, increasing your physical fitness, or volunteering your time at church. DOING things is where good memories are made. I've been down a path similar to yours, so I speak with experience. I am a xennial, too--old enough to have some 20/20 hindsight, but young enough to relate to the younger crowd.

 

[Sara50840]

This is VERY good advice, right here! I am about to launch a blog just because I like to write for fun, but don't think for a minute that I wont eventually be making money from it. I suggest doing an online search for the following phrases: "blog seo 2023", "blog best practices", "what every blog needs", "how to monetize a blog", "how to write quality content for blogs".
You might consider podcasting as a means of income as well. One fact concerning any online medium used to make money is this: it will take time, but even more effort. If you aren't fully invested in at least a weekly new blog article/podcast, don't expect to grow a large base of followers.
In the meantime if you want to make some serious cash for a minimal investment, look at working an entry-level position in a skilled trade. Most will start you out with no experience at around $15.00/hour. Grossing $600.00/week with no experience is nothing to laugh at. You could easily max out a Roth IRA and not even miss the money. If your in your twenties, starting a Roth NOW will make it very easy to retire a millionaire--even on a modest 5-figure income.
One more word of advice: don't dabble in doing a little bit of everything. Instead, focus on a job and a blog, or a job and a podcast--and do them both very well. Watching tv all the time will also lead to regret down the road. You don't want to be the one who WATCHED others doing things when you could have DONE them. The whole Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) is a myth created by the media to keep you hooked on social media and video/audio entertainment so you will keep seeing their ads, and buying their products. FOMO is diabolical and a fraud. If you put down your phone, and shut off anything with a screen, you will discover that you have all the time in the world to pursue whatever goals you want. Time will slow down, days will get longer (even if you're busy), and your life will be so much richer. Screen withdrawl is very hard at first, so you have to treat it like a drug addiction and be resolute in staying away from it. FOMO naturally will set in like, "I'm missing my favorite shows!!!". No, you're really not. You're missing what the media's elite have conditioned you to become addicted to. After a month it gets real easy, especially if you have found other things to do like learning a musical instrument, increasing your physical fitness, or volunteering your time at church. DOING things is where good memories are made. I've been down a path similar to yours, so I speak with experience. I am a xennial, too--old enough to have some 20/20 hindsight, but young enough to relate to the younger crowd.

Thanks for the tips! I know a lot about media and have tried things like YouTube channels, but I really do have my hands in everything because I’m trying to see what produces the most fruit. The problem is that I’m trying to maintain everything at once while I experiment, which is leading to serious burnout. I guess I need to pick one project at a time to focus on.

 

[ElCamino]

Thanks for the tips! I know a lot about media and have tried things like YouTube channels, but I really do have my hands in everything because I’m trying to see what produces the most fruit. The problem is that I’m trying to maintain everything at once while I experiment, which is leading to serious burnout. I guess I need to pick one project at a time to focus on.

This is one of the reasons I eventually decided to blog, because it gives me a lot of flexibility. Once I had the website setup all I've been doing is write a couple of articles a week and then I'm free to try other stuff.

I plan to create 5 or 6 new blogs in 2023. Basically build a new one every couple of months. The good news is that once they're setup you only have to worry about writing articles (if you build them thinking of getting only traffic from search engines.)

This is one activity that (in my opinion) does allow you to experiment with different projects, in your case though, since you're new at this, I recommend focusing 100% on a single blog for at least 6 months.

Anyway, if you're interested in knowing more about it, let me know and I'll send you via PM a few resources that helped get started (I don't want to advertise third-party links here).

 

[DragonFox91]

How's it going OP? Are you doing better? Are you able to see how God worked yet? We want to know!

My best friend from college has a minor disability. He couldn’t land a job for what he went for. He went on tons of interviews, & I mean tons, got rejected every time. He kept thinking he would land a job in his field. He was willing to move anywhere. Eventually he landed a minimum wage job, but was depressed, & started applying for jobs outside his field. Whatever it was, he applied for it. A couple times he landed one, but his disability affected job performance & he was let go. His faith remained strong & he’d ask people to pray for him b/c he’d get depressed.

I hate to say it, but it got to the point where I stopped contact with him.

I decided to call him the other day: he has been in a banking position for 2 years & is loving it. He lives 2 minutes from the beach in Florida. I went to school for Accounting, he always thought he could never do a financial position, what do you know, that’s where he’s happy.

Few things: Don’t be so strict about what you apply for. Just b/c your degree says ‘Biology’ (for example), that doesn’t mean you’re gonna get a Biology job. Be flexible. It’s okay to have dreams, & a plan that seems like it’ll get you there, but God may pull you elsewhere that fits your strengths & weaknesses better.

Don’t expect to be making big money right away. Everyone wants to be making that middle or high end salary, but what’s most likely & is probably better anyways, is starting with a smaller $$$$ amount & working your way up. That’s what they don’t tell you: how many people started with a job that seemed poor but they acquired the skills & experience to advance. After a couple years where they are, a position opens up they simply weren’t qualified for earlier & it better matches the pay they had wanted so they take it.

Good things can take time. It took my buddy 10-15 years. I really struggled finding a job after college as well. I wasn’t even getting hired for minimum wage jobs. I probably went on 60-70 interviews, not kidding. Something felt wrong w/ me. I got depressed. Finally I did but it didn’t match me & I got let go. A week later I got hired into a position I’ve been working at for 10 years. It seems silly to have been so depressed about job hunting, but it really didn’t take as long as I was dreading.

It is not hopeless. God will find a place for you that you can find peace in. In Christ there’s no reason to be depressed:

Phillippians 4: I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

 

[Sara50840]

How's it going OP? Are you doing better? Are you able to see how God worked yet? We want to know!

My best friend from college has a minor disability. He couldn’t land a job for what he went for. He went on tons of interviews, & I mean tons, got rejected every time. He kept thinking he would land a job in his field. He was willing to move anywhere. Eventually he landed a minimum wage job, but was depressed, & started applying for jobs outside his field. Whatever it was, he applied for it. A couple times he landed one, but his disability affected job performance & he was let go. His faith remained strong & he’d ask people to pray for him b/c he’d get depressed.

I hate to say it, but it got to the point where I stopped contact with him.

I decided to call him the other day: he has been in a banking position for 2 years & is loving it. He lives 2 minutes from the beach in Florida. I went to school for Accounting, he always thought he could never do a financial position, what do you know, that’s where he’s happy.

Few things: Don’t be so strict about what you apply for. Just b/c your degree says ‘Biology’ (for example), that doesn’t mean you’re gonna get a Biology job. Be flexible. It’s okay to have dreams, & a plan that seems like it’ll get you there, but God may pull you elsewhere that fits your strengths & weaknesses better.

Don’t expect to be making big money right away. Everyone wants to be making that middle or high end salary, but what’s most likely & is probably better anyways, is starting with a smaller $$$$ amount & working your way up. That’s what they don’t tell you: how many people started with a job that seemed poor but they acquired the skills & experience to advance. After a couple years where they are, a position opens up they simply weren’t qualified for earlier & it better matches the pay they had wanted so they take it.

Good things can take time. It took my buddy 10-15 years. I really struggled finding a job after college as well. I wasn’t even getting hired for minimum wage jobs. I probably went on 60-70 interviews, not kidding. Something felt wrong w/ me. I got depressed. Finally I did but it didn’t match me & I got let go. A week later I got hired into a position I’ve been working at for 10 years. It seems silly to have been so depressed about job hunting, but it really didn’t take as long as I was dreading.

It is not hopeless. God will find a place for you that you can find peace in. In Christ there’s no reason to be depressed:

Phillippians 4: I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

I’m doing much better!

Since this post, my grandmother was brought home on hospice. Because I didn’t have a job, I was able to be home with her and could take care of her each day. Because I live with my parents, I wasn’t the only one there to take care of her, but I still pulled a ton of weight and Dad says he couldn’t have done it without me.

I had found a contract job where I was filming content for a marketing agency, but I was having to drive 1.5-2hr one-way (so up to 4 hours total) for only about 4 hours of work, once a month for not much more than I was making at my retail job before. When I accepted this job, I was expecting advancement opportunities and additional remote work, but they were just using me for in-person work and would hand off all the remote work to their other employees. I was being taken advantage of there, so I quit. To give you an idea of how much money I got there: I had to buy a new set of tires right after, which cost more than all the money I made from this job over the course of the 2 months I was there. However, this experience ignited a creative streak in me and inspired me to do the same type of work myself, without an agency to underpay me.

After my grandmother passed, my job search improved. A friend recommended a content creation job she saw for a Christian ministry, so I applied for it and was hired. It’s not full time but freelance for a few hours a week, so it’s a good side hustle. When the pay question came up, I was afraid to pitch a pay rate because I’d been taken advantage of so much and was really questioning my worth. I tried to Google good rates and decided on something that I was planning to pitch. I eventually chickened out and pitched a very broad range to him, but he selected a rate $10 higher than the one I was going to pitch to him in the first place, and he was afraid that was still undervaluing me. This was very eye-opening to me because after so many months (years, really) of imposter syndrome, I finally found someone that appreciates my work and makes me realize that I AM worth it. This rate is more than triple what I was making at the marketing agency I quit, and the new job is completely remote.

Not too long ago the marketing agency reached back out to me at like 10pm asking if I could come film for them because their guy cancelled. It was less than 12hr notice for when their shoot time was scheduled. They offered to double my pay for my troubles. I was so shocked that they would reach out to me after I quit; they must be very desperate. I respectfully declined.

Meanwhile I’ve been interviewing for full-time work also. After several interviews with different jobs, I was offered a media position at my alma mater, which has decent pay, good benefits (never had a job that offered benefits before), and is a very reasonable commute. I start next month!

I also just resigned from my church position. There’s a lot of drama there that I mentioned in another thread, but I felt God leading me away from there. There were some bad things going on there, and God helped deliver me out of it. I’m currently looking for a new church home, and there’s a new church I’m currently attending to see if this is where God wants me.

These past few months have taught me a lot about being content where I am, being content in Christ. Once I stopped feeling sorry for myself and actually opened His Word, the depression faded away. I established consistent routines of reading the Bible every day and exercising each day. I grew closer to my grandmother in her last days and even read her some Scripture I’d been reading. I’ve gotten closer with my sister and a friend as I confided with them about the church drama I was experiencing and they helped support me through it.

I’ve grown a lot over the past several months, and I’m grateful for it. If I could go back and talk to the version of myself that first posted this thread, I’d give her a hug and say, “It’ll all be okay. Some days will be easy, but most will be hard. But God has great things planned for you, just wait.”

Thank you for your support. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for me.

 

[DragonFox91]

I’m doing much better!

Since this post, my grandmother was brought home on hospice. Because I didn’t have a job, I was able to be home with her and could take care of her each day. Because I live with my parents, I wasn’t the only one there to take care of her, but I still pulled a ton of weight and Dad says he couldn’t have done it without me.

I had found a contract job where I was filming content for a marketing agency, but I was having to drive 1.5-2hr one-way (so up to 4 hours total) for only about 4 hours of work, once a month for not much more than I was making at my retail job before. When I accepted this job, I was expecting advancement opportunities and additional remote work, but they were just using me for in-person work and would hand off all the remote work to their other employees. I was being taken advantage of there, so I quit. To give you an idea of how much money I got there: I had to buy a new set of tires right after, which cost more than all the money I made from this job over the course of the 2 months I was there. However, this experience ignited a creative streak in me and inspired me to do the same type of work myself, without an agency to underpay me.

After my grandmother passed, my job search improved. A friend recommended a content creation job she saw for a Christian ministry, so I applied for it and was hired. It’s not full time but freelance for a few hours a week, so it’s a good side hustle. When the pay question came up, I was afraid to pitch a pay rate because I’d been taken advantage of so much and was really questioning my worth. I tried to Google good rates and decided on something that I was planning to pitch. I eventually chickened out and pitched a very broad range to him, but he selected a rate $10 higher than the one I was going to pitch to him in the first place, and he was afraid that was still undervaluing me. This was very eye-opening to me because after so many months (years, really) of imposter syndrome, I finally found someone that appreciates my work and makes me realize that I AM worth it. This rate is more than triple what I was making at the marketing agency I quit, and the new job is completely remote.

Not too long ago the marketing agency reached back out to me at like 10pm asking if I could come film for them because their guy cancelled. It was less than 12hr notice for when their shoot time was scheduled. They offered to double my pay for my troubles. I was so shocked that they would reach out to me after I quit; they must be very desperate. I respectfully declined.

Meanwhile I’ve been interviewing for full-time work also. After several interviews with different jobs, I was offered a media position at my alma mater, which has decent pay, good benefits (never had a job that offered benefits before), and is a very reasonable commute. I start next month!

I also just resigned from my church position. There’s a lot of drama there that I mentioned in another thread, but I felt God leading me away from there. There were some bad things going on there, and God helped deliver me out of it. I’m currently looking for a new church home, and there’s a new church I’m currently attending to see if this is where God wants me.

These past few months have taught me a lot about being content where I am, being content in Christ. Once I stopped feeling sorry for myself and actually opened His Word, the depression faded away. I established consistent routines of reading the Bible every day and exercising each day. I grew closer to my grandmother in her last days and even read her some Scripture I’d been reading. I’ve gotten closer with my sister and a friend as I confided with them about the church drama I was experiencing and they helped support me through it.

I’ve grown a lot over the past several months, and I’m grateful for it. If I could go back and talk to the version of myself that first posted this thread, I’d give her a hug and say, “It’ll all be okay. Some days will be easy, but most will be hard. But God has great things planned for you, just wait.”

Thank you for your support. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for me.

Wow! That is so exciting! It sounds like God is moving in your life! He will continue to do big things with you & use you just like He said he would! Keep going!