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Father's Day and Shaming Language in the Church & Society

GeorgiaGuyinAtlanta

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We all love our mothers, and rightfully so. It's no surprise that when Mother's Day rolls around, the media and the church trump up this day of importance, often weeks in advance, touting the virtue and importance of a mother. Advertisements speak of expensive gifts to buy mom. Sermons talk about the love, patience, and nurturing nature of a mother. Her utmost being is praised, it seems, speaking of her generosity, her selfless acts, and her unconditional love. She is a woman to be admired and honored.

Yet, when Father's Day rolls around, it is a much different story. While advertisers may roll out commercials to commemorate this day, rarely is it met with calls to purchase expensive gifts for dad. Usually it's something small and inexpensive, such as a tie. The greatest tragedy, however, is the way the church reacts to Father's Day, in my opinion. Sermon after sermon, from church to church, all across the country, are filled with shaming language. In a large percentage of churches, very little is said of dad's patience, his unconditional love, his generosity, and how our fathers have played positive roles in our lives.

No, unfortunately, most sermons are filled with shaming language. Sermons that speak of what dad is not doing, how dad's aren't in the home. How many dads are "dead-beats". How fathers are not spending time with their children. How fathers are lazy, watching television on the couch and not doing a thing. Simultaneously, in many of these discussions, mothers are often invoked, in a so-called joking manner, as to provide an alternative character, one who apparently has it together.

Even on this one day, a day to honor fathers, it seems apparent that many can't speak of men and fathers in a positive way. It's always turned around on men, in a way to denounce them for not doing enough. It can't be that men are simply honored in a positive manner just on this one day. While there are fathers who need to "step-up-to-the-plate", Father's Day is not the time for such sermons. There are fifty one other weeks in the year in which such a sermon could be preached. Likewise, women and mothers should also be called to "step-up-to-the-plate", as not all women and mothers are vituous, but certainly Mother's Day isn't the day to do such.

The way people react differently to Mother's Day as opposed to Father's Day, is also seen throughout other church settings such as men's conferences and women's conferences. At the men's conference, a man often gets an earload of shaming language, about how he needs to be a better man for his wife and children. Certainly, this should be a component to any men's conference, or at least a break-out session at such a conference, but it should be done in a respectful manner, not to berate men, but to encourage them. Likewise, women's conferences should call women to be better wives. Unfortunately, at least seen from televised women's conferences, not much is said of women "stepping up". the largest emphasis at a women's conference is pleasing God and becoming the person God wants you to be.

Do any of you notice the vast differences in the ways that people react to Mother's Day as opposed to Father's Day? Do you notice the differences in the ways men are "called to the carpet", but subsequently, women are given a pass?
 

WinBySurrender

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Regarding your comments about not encouraging kids to buy expensive gifts for dad, I guess you haven't seen the Home Depot commercials. ^_^

Secondly, if that's the kind of message you're hearing in your church, perhaps you need to change churches. I've never heard a message like that on Father's Day.
 
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heweeps

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There is a move in the world to enshrine women and demean men. It is part of the move against God, the Father. It crops up quite big in the book of Jeremiah so is not a new thing.

So if it has slipped into the church in places, it is no surprise. There is much of the world in the churches these days.
 
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Thigbee

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Advertisers have been dissing men and fathers for years now - making them look like dunces, inept, incompetent, stupid, witless, and totally needful of their wive's superior abilities in just about everything.

It's pretty sad, the war on men that's being waged with virtually no opposition.
 
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Rick Otto

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Yeah! And it spills over into politics also! My hope is in the upcoming elections that some men will get elected to some more prominent positions in our government instead of always being relegated to secondary positions! :thumbsup:
tulc(oh wait...) :sorry:
Shame on you tulc!
My wife handles those messy spiills with a Brawny paper towel.

OK, "war" is a bit shrill, but he's right about our profile gettin' dissed.
 
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Rick Otto

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I was a single parent in the mid '80s for awhile.
I remember being the only guy in the welfare office.
Food stamps were more trouble than I thought they were worth.
I had section 8 housing. It was for 4yrs after my 4yrs in the USAF.
I was a full-time student getting associate degrees in commercial art & commercial photography. Interesting time.
 
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WinBySurrender

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Sure am. ;)
tulc(slightly more now then before) :)
So you think its funny that society in general and the court system in particular thinks dads are losers, idiots, incompetents and dead-beats? That's your idea of a joke? I thought you were smarter than that, Tulc. Perhaps you'd be interested in knowing I raised my kids by myself from the time my son was nine and my daughter was six. Why? Because after the divorce, their mother took up with someone I won't go into detail about, but suffice to say she disappeared from their lives for four years. When she came back she wanted the kids back. I never took so much satisfaction from anything as I took from the judge's comment in denying her petition. "If you'd been here for the last four years, I might listen to your argument. But as you weren't, you have no argument."

I am not unique. There are countless fathers across this country and in the rest of the world taking up the slack for slacker moms who use their feminist "rights" to put the screws to good men who have done nothing except make the mistake of being born male

Done here.
 
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WinBySurrender

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tulc

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So you think its funny that society in general and the court system in particular thinks dads are losers, idiots, incompetents and dead-beats? That's your idea of a joke? I thought you were smarter than that, Tulc. Perhaps you'd be interested in knowing I raised my kids by myself from the time my son was nine and my daughter was six. Why? Because after the divorce, their mother took up with someone I won't go into detail about, but suffice to say she disappeared from their lives for four years. When she came back she wanted the kids back. I never took so much satisfaction from anything as I took from the judge's comment in denying her petition. "If you'd been here for the last four years, I might listen to your argument. But as you weren't, you have no argument."

I am not unique. There are countless fathers across this country and in the rest of the world taking jup the slack for slacker moms who use their feminist "rights" to put the screws to good men who have done nothing except make the mistake of being born male. Tulc, sorry, but you don't know what the hell you're laughing at, or why.

Done here.
I honestly apologize, I had no idea it was an issue so close to home, I was insensitive and sincerely hope you know I wouldn't have been so flippant had I known. :(
tulc(will remove the posts) :wave:
 
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WinBySurrender

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I honestly apologize, I had no idea it was an issue so close to home, I was insensitive and sincerely hope you know I wouldn't have been so flippant had I known. :(
tulc(will remove the posts) :wave:
Apology accepted and forgiveness offered. Please accept my apology for being so severe with you, and forgive me for that slight. God bless, Tulc.

As always your friend (though a bit more bent conservatively than most of yours),
WBS

PS: Please note I've removed the offensive line at the end of that post as well.
 
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P

Publius

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We all love our mothers, and rightfully so. It's no surprise that when Mother's Day rolls around, the media and the church trump up this day of importance, often weeks in advance, touting the virtue and importance of a mother. Advertisements speak of expensive gifts to buy mom. Sermons talk about the love, patience, and nurturing nature of a mother. Her utmost being is praised, it seems, speaking of her generosity, her selfless acts, and her unconditional love. She is a woman to be admired and honored.

Yet, when Father's Day rolls around, it is a much different story. While advertisers may roll out commercials to commemorate this day, rarely is it met with calls to purchase expensive gifts for dad. Usually it's something small and inexpensive, such as a tie. The greatest tragedy, however, is the way the church reacts to Father's Day, in my opinion. Sermon after sermon, from church to church, all across the country, are filled with shaming language. In a large percentage of churches, very little is said of dad's patience, his unconditional love, his generosity, and how our fathers have played positive roles in our lives.

No, unfortunately, most sermons are filled with shaming language. Sermons that speak of what dad is not doing, how dad's aren't in the home. How many dads are "dead-beats". How fathers are not spending time with their children. How fathers are lazy, watching television on the couch and not doing a thing. Simultaneously, in many of these discussions, mothers are often invoked, in a so-called joking manner, as to provide an alternative character, one who apparently has it together.

Even on this one day, a day to honor fathers, it seems apparent that many can't speak of men and fathers in a positive way. It's always turned around on men, in a way to denounce them for not doing enough. It can't be that men are simply honored in a positive manner just on this one day. While there are fathers who need to "step-up-to-the-plate", Father's Day is not the time for such sermons. There are fifty one other weeks in the year in which such a sermon could be preached. Likewise, women and mothers should also be called to "step-up-to-the-plate", as not all women and mothers are vituous, but certainly Mother's Day isn't the day to do such.

The way people react differently to Mother's Day as opposed to Father's Day, is also seen throughout other church settings such as men's conferences and women's conferences. At the men's conference, a man often gets an earload of shaming language, about how he needs to be a better man for his wife and children. Certainly, this should be a component to any men's conference, or at least a break-out session at such a conference, but it should be done in a respectful manner, not to berate men, but to encourage them. Likewise, women's conferences should call women to be better wives. Unfortunately, at least seen from televised women's conferences, not much is said of women "stepping up". the largest emphasis at a women's conference is pleasing God and becoming the person God wants you to be.

Do any of you notice the vast differences in the ways that people react to Mother's Day as opposed to Father's Day? Do you notice the differences in the ways men are "called to the carpet", but subsequently, women are given a pass?

I'm sorry you had that experience. Perhaps you should check out the sermons of Voddie Baucham. He preaches about Biblical manhood and fatherhood all the time.
 
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WinBySurrender

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Nonsense. In fact several of the links you posted earlier were certainly pro-father.
Of course they were! Geez, how can you read those articles and not realize they are in support of dads in light of the stupidity others show? They bring to light the nonsense that is going on in this world. Do you read anything before you post, or do you just let your fingers fly and shoot off whatever comes out?
 
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tulc

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Apology accepted and forgiveness offered. Please accept my apology for being so severe with you, and forgive me for that slight. God bless, Tulc.

As always your friend (though a bit more bent conservatively than most of yours),
WBS

PS: Please note I've removed the offensive line at the end of that post as well.

Thanks bro! :wave:
tulc(will celebrate with a cup of coffee!) ;)
 
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Rick Otto

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My wife & I have always held most of these societal conventions at arm's length.
We treat it with a sense of humor when we don't just ignore it.
For instance, one time for Mother's day I bought my wife a pack of cigarrettes & a 6-pack of beer.
 
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