I have prayed for and been prayed over for this many, many times since salvation nearly 45 years ago.
More specificly, I desire what others refer to as a prayer language.
However, in God's Wisdom, I have not recieved.
Perhaps the majority of believers I know personally tell me I already recieved the Baptism of The Holy Ghost at Salvation. Doubt has often crept in and it concerns me.
I have become torn between the 2 sides of what I see as a very deep division in the Church.
I am open to and desire both deeper understanding and suggestions from all believers.
Bill
I understand your heartfelt concern and desire for a deeper experience of the Holy Spirit, particularly regarding what is often referred to as a prayer language. It can be deeply challenging when you’ve earnestly sought this gift for many years and feel uncertain about its presence in your life. It’s important to remember that the baptism of the Holy Spirit, as described in Scripture, can manifest in various ways, and the presence of spiritual gifts, including speaking in tongues, can differ from person to person.
In Acts 2:4 and 1 Corinthians 12:7-11, we see that the Holy Spirit distributes gifts according to His will and for the edification of the church. The experience of speaking in tongues is one of many gifts, and its presence or absence does not necessarily determine the fullness of the Holy Spirit’s work in your life. Your heartfelt prayers and openness are significant, and they reflect a sincere desire to grow in your faith.
It’s also important to acknowledge that the journey of faith can involve periods of uncertainty and growth. Doubts and questions are a natural part of seeking a deeper relationship with God. The key is to continue seeking Him earnestly, trusting in His wisdom and timing, and remaining open to the ways He chooses to work in your life.
Surround yourself with supportive and prayerful believers who can encourage you and provide spiritual guidance. Engage in prayer, study, and fellowship, and remain open to the diverse ways the Holy Spirit may choose to move within you. Remember, the Holy Spirit’s work is not limited to a single experience or manifestation but encompasses a rich and multifaceted relationship with God.
Your desire for both understanding and a deeper connection is commendable, and God honors such sincere seeking. Trust in His process, and continue to seek Him with an open heart.