Dealing with pretentious know it alls

[ZooKeeper944]

How do you deal with a pretentious know it all?

Someone who views their self as the intellectual crusader who must change everyone, because in their view most people are ignorant and stupid.

Someone who has insulated their self from getting input from most, because in their mind everyone is stupid, and their self is the agent of change for the "stupid people"?

Is there a way to constructively confront such a person, or should one consider such a person as incapable of being reached due to elevating their self in a self contained intellectual apparatus of arrogance?

Yes, people do exist who truly feel as if they are THE intellectual crusader whom all the "stupid people" must submit to.

These people go berzerk if you pose the possibility that they aren't the intellectual mover and shaker they believe their self to be. They'll claim you "just don't get it" if you suggest they are possibly being arrogant or placing themself above others.

Their easy out card is the "you just don't get me" "you just don't get it" statement, whenever you slightly suggest that they are being arrogant, insulated, and possibly not as relevant as they esteem themself.

They're the misunderstood "outsider".
The lone voice in the wilderness every stupid person refuses to submit to.

Is there a way to break through their deluded arrogant facade?

 

[High Fidelity]

Play them at their own game. Prove them wrong. Normally it only needs to happen once before they wind their neck in.

 

[iambren]

Echo back a summary of their beliefs. State why they are wrong in as succinct a way as possible, then walk away. If you linger they will just argue.

 

[Miss Spaulding]

Somebody is coming to mind......oh gosh...what was his name...


It'll come to me.

 

[MehGuy]

I usually ignore them.

Many times those types of people are stupid themselves, and I just don't want to deal with them. If they want to think they're better than everyone, go ahead.. just leave me alone.

 

[Waddler]

Is there a way to break through their deluded arrogant facade?

That's how.

 

[Shattered-Reflections]

If they are defensive, there's a chance that being an intellectual crusader has become their identity and therefore defines their worth as a human being. It gives them meaning, purpose, and makes them a "good" person. People will fight others tooth and nail to protect their good image -- because who you are is all you got without God. As Christians who we are is defined by Christ, not our titles or pursuits. It's only through humility and being proven wrong that those people will have to reconsider who they truly are ...or remain in denial.

If you're talking about a Christian, you could remind them of their humble position in Christ. Remind them that it's "love" that is the greatest of all things, that "knowledge" only puffs up one's ego, that we are not to think ourselves better or more important than others. Maybe be an example and help others without the attitude that you're better than anyone else. One of the best thing to do is humbly prove them wrong about their knowledge. If they won't accept they are wrong, it's okay to walk away. If it's a reoccurring theme, it's okay to walk away before a fight starts. At some point, people reap what they sow. Arrogance match with negative views has a way of chasing every close relationship away. Sometimes people have to fall apart before they realize that their way of operating in the world isn't working and they are not as good as they thought they were.

If a person only respects his own intelligences and reason, then only he can talk himself out of his delusion. If everyone else is just "wrong" then when others give advice, he'll just be on the defensive. Leave someone alone and he will only have himself to fight with.

 

[ZooKeeper944]

If they are defensive, there's a chance that being an intellectual crusader has become their identity and therefore defines their worth as a human being. It gives them meaning, purpose, and makes them a "good" person. People will fight others tooth and nail to protect their good image -- because who you are is all you got without God. As Christians who we are is defined by Christ, not our titles or pursuits. It's only through humility and being proven wrong that those people will have to reconsider who they truly are ...or remain in denial.

If you're talking about a Christian, you could remind them of their humble position in Christ. Remind them that it's "love" that is the greatest of all things, that "knowledge" only puffs up one's ego, that we are not to think ourselves better or more important than others. Maybe be an example and help others without the attitude that you're better than anyone else. One of the best thing to do is humbly prove them wrong about their knowledge. If they won't accept they are wrong, it's okay to walk away. If it's a reoccurring theme, it's okay to walk away before a fight starts. At some point, people reap what they sow. Arrogance match with negative views has a way of chasing every close relationship away. Sometimes people have to fall apart before they realize that their way of operating in the world isn't working and they are not as good as they thought they were.

Thanks.

 

[Shattered-Reflections]

I should add, remember where you've come from and that you were once an enemy of God. So pray for your enemy's benefit, as Christ would. Don't become trapped by the same "I'm better than him" attitude as others are trapped by.

And remember, while you do what you can to bless others and do good... God is in control and believe me God can humble people like no other.

So do what you can, barring in mind your time may be better spent helping those who are open and receptive.

 

[Somber]

Great posts Shattered.


In reply to OP. I don't know if there is anything you can do. I have tried reasoning with them before, and it doesn't work. Last time I tried was probably back in my teen years...the person later told my mom I was very disrespectful.

Brings to mind these verses.

Proverbs 14:7 Go from the presence of a foolish man, when thou perceivest not in him the lips of knowledge.

Proverbs 23:9 Speak not in the ears of a fool: for he will despise the wisdom of thy words.

Proverbs 24:7 Wisdom is too high for a fool: he openeth not his mouth in the gate.

Proverbs 26:4 Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest thou also be like unto him.

Galatians 6:3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.

 

[Toro]

I look him in the mirror and say.

Good Lord, what happened to you? ........ You used to be so good looking and young.

 

[Jupiter Drops]

Ignore them. Be humble. When they say something wrong, correct them subtly. Don't even bother caring so hard about small-minded people.

 

[DaedraSun]

How do you deal with a pretentious know it all?

Someone who views their self as the intellectual crusader who must change everyone, because in their view most people are ignorant and stupid.

Someone who has insulated their self from getting input from most, because in their mind everyone is stupid, and their self is the agent of change for the "stupid people"?

Is there a way to constructively confront such a person, or should one consider such a person as incapable of being reached due to elevating their self in a self contained intellectual apparatus of arrogance?

Yes, people do exist who truly feel as if they are THE intellectual crusader whom all the "stupid people" must submit to.

These people go berzerk if you pose the possibility that they aren't the intellectual mover and shaker they believe their self to be. They'll claim you "just don't get it" if you suggest they are possibly being arrogant or placing themself above others.

Their easy out card is the "you just don't get me" "you just don't get it" statement, whenever you slightly suggest that they are being arrogant, insulated, and possibly not as relevant as they esteem themself.

They're the misunderstood "outsider".
The lone voice in the wilderness every stupid person refuses to submit to.

Is there a way to break through their deluded arrogant facade?

One person's delusion is another man's reality. I'm not sure you can do much except to state your views how you see them and move on.

Is there a point in "humbling" them anyway? Proving someone wrong and taking satisfaction in it is not usually a characteristic of charity - but one of pride.

 

[redblue22]

what he or she says might be true. I listen and ask questions.

.

 

[Gadarene]

Prove them wrong. Name-calling might be satisfying, but it's not a counter-argument.

 

[CCHIPSS]

Just show this this video.

North Point

 

[chuck77]

Edited.

 

[Legal_Eagle]

I think most ideologues that you are talking about are insecure at some level. Proving others "wrong" is the only way they can justify their own beliefs. Every one of us has suffered from insecurities at times, so I don't think it is that hard to empathize with them. People like that are more afraid of what you have to say then you think. Certainly, avoiding people when they are in a mood like that is understandable, as the conflict with them will not change their mind. However, if you really want to reach person like that, you have to find a way for them to let their guard down with you. The people that get past their high walls of defensiveness, are the only ones that can change them. I have a couple of family members like that, and there are only a select few people that they let their defenses down to. I do detect a bit of anger on your part in regards to people like this. Understandable. Just remember that confronting their indignation with your irritation will do nobody any good.

 

[Nanopants]

Walking away can sometimes be the best route to take, but beating them at their own game can definitely be a lot of fun

 

[Legal_Eagle]

It may be fun, but I don't think that solves anything the long run. The question is what are you trying to accomplish with this person? If nothing, just walk away. If you are trying to get them to change, confrontation probably isn't the best option. Rubbing their faces in their own ignorance isn't a very Christian approach.