christians having sex BEFORE marriage???

[elijah115]

I think this is one of those topics that you sometimes feel no-one is giving you straight answers, just interpretations of the bible that depend on which meaning of words you choose. I think reading the old testament you will find that "sex" was used interchangeably with "marrying". For example in Genesis you'll see the phrase a lot "and they married and gave birth to" (my paraphrase). Again you have the saying by Jesus about "two becoming one". Having sex is implied to be an act of devotion. You're giving yourself to your wife physically, and becoming one with her (vice versa if you are female). I don't see how you can give yourself to multiple partners and become one with many (by which I mean more than one) women. I think that is a recipe for emotional infidelity and a divided heart. And if you imagine such a heart to be a divided house, then your relationships won't stand.

We should also think what is a bigger testimony to non-christians, a christian who has had sex before marriage or a christian who hasn't had sex before marriage. Jesus said that a man of truth is someone who gives honour to the one who sent him, and doesn't come to act in his own name (paraphrased from the Gospel of John). I think sex before marriage is an act to gratify one's own desires, not bring glory to God, so in a sense you can be fooled into deceiving yourself, if you say "as long as you love the person you're having sex with". So what if you love the girl you want to have sex with? If you love her enough to want to have sex with her, you should love her enough to want to marry her. In my book, if you don't love her enough to marry her, then you don't love in the deepest sense of and ultimate use of the word.

The way i decide is by asking myself, am I tempted to have sex before marriage because I want to please myself or if I did have sex before marriage would I be a good witness for Christ? You can also ask yourself the question, if you have sex before marriage, aren't you making your ministers, pastors, popes, elders, bishops, vicars and priests, out to be liars, if they interpret the bible to teach no sex before marriage? Jesus asked prayed for his followers to be united, and Paul asked the churches, he wrote to, to avoid divisions (in Galatians I think). You can ask yourself, "Do I want to be a source of division in the body in christ?". If not, then it would be better for you to get a girlfriend who thinks like you, who wants to have sex after marriage.

 

[peaceful soul]

I think this is one of those topics that you sometimes feel no-one is giving you straight answers, just interpretations of the bible that depend on which meaning of words you choose. I think reading the old testament you will find that "sex" was used interchangeably with "marrying". For example in Genesis you'll see the phrase a lot "and they married and gave birth to" (my paraphrase). Again you have the saying by Jesus about "two becoming one". Having sex is implied to be an act of devotion. You're giving yourself to your wife physically, and becoming one with her (vice versa if you are female). I don't see how you can give yourself to multiple partners and become one with many (by which I mean more than one) women. I think that is a recipe for emotional infidelity and a divided heart. And if you imagine such a heart to be a divided house, then your relationships won't stand.

We should also think what is a bigger testimony to non-christians, a christian who has had sex before marriage or a christian who hasn't had sex before marriage. Jesus said that a man of truth is someone who gives honour to the one who sent him, and doesn't come to act in his own name (paraphrased from the Gospel of John). I think sex before marriage is an act to gratify one's own desires, not bring glory to God, so in a sense you can be fooled into deceiving yourself, if you say "as long as you love the person you're having sex with". So what if you love the girl you want to have sex with? If you love her enough to want to have sex with her, you should love her enough to want to marry her. In my book, if you don't love her enough to marry her, then you don't love in the deepest sense of and ultimate use of the word.

The way i decide is by asking myself, am I tempted to have sex before marriage because I want to please myself or if I did have sex before marriage would I be a good witness for Christ? You can also ask yourself the question, if you have sex before marriage, aren't you making your ministers, pastors, popes, elders, bishops, vicars and priests, out to be liars, if they interpret the bible to teach no sex before marriage? Jesus asked prayed for his followers to be united, and Paul asked the churches, he wrote to, to avoid divisions (in Galatians I think). You can ask yourself, "Do I want to be a source of division in the body in christ?". If not, then it would be better for you to get a girlfriend who thinks like you, who wants to have sex after marriage.

Good post elijah115. I agree. It makes a lot of sense. The Genesis incorporation of marriage was done by God. We should be allowing God to lead us in whom we should marry or if we should marry. All too often, we make a choice without involving God in the mix. I think that is one of the reasons for many of the problems in marriages today. We go and marry and then expect God to intervene to fix our mess. Had we included Him from the beginning, chances are that we would not have many of the problems we have now.

 

[srev2004]

Hi

I'm a 17yr old Christian and have been with my boyfriend for 6 months now. We are both Christians and struggle allot with the idea of sex.
We have used our self control so many times under the hardest circumstances... 3 of my closest friends have made love to their long-term boyfriends, more than a third of my friends (guys AND girls) have also done it too, and sex is talked about openly and freely between people I am usually around. SO we start thinking, they can do it, why can't we?!
They haven't been damned to hell or anything, they're relationship hasn't broken up with mistrust... if anything it has strengthened their relationships. What I'm saying is that sex has really had no negative effect on any of my 3best friends lives, one of them is Christian and still goes to church. (The other two just have the typical teenage view "can't be bothered to think about that boring stuff") but all three live happy, healthy lives.
Basically, sex has become a less formal event and instead is generally known (between my group of friends especially) to be practically inevitable between any serious relationship.

So I think to myself, why not us.
And I came online to check it out...

First I went to one of the many sites with the complete bible and searched for every reference to the word sex. Surprisingly to me, it occurred quite a few times! And still, I found no actual verse or chapter that said do not have sex out of marriage.
There are heaps of passages that say, "do not commit sexual immorality", but there is a passage that explains exactly what that is... Leviticus 18. Basically it says not to have sex to any of your relations, any married person, with animals or with a women who are having their period. Nothing about sex out of marriage.
There are also many passages that say "do not commit adultery" but what exactly is adultery? So I searched for the word and read every passage that mentions it. I found that almost every time it was written, it was linked to the words "unfaithfulness" and "prostitution". Now I know what they are. They are sex to another person whilst you are married. In Proverbs 5:20, the bible Sais "Why be captivated, my son, by an adulteress?" It then goes on to clarify this with "Why embrace the bosom of another man's wife?" So there we have a definition of adultery: a married person having sex to someone who is not his or her spouse. There are many other references to this definition, but nowhere does it give the meaning that it is just sex without being married to the person. Again, nothing about sex out of marriage.

During my searches I found 1 Corinthians 7. All about marriage. Supposedly. The thing that started me thinking was the footnote under it all, referring to the very first verse. The verse goes "Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry", but the footnote underneath (bible.gospelcom.net, the New International Version) reads " Or 'It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.'" This started me thinking, if one word "marry" can be replaced with "sexual relations" why can't the word likewise be changed if it is written again by the same person, in the same piece or writing, in the same context. I know the bible has been translated, and how hard it is to interchange some words between languages. Words could be replaced with words that have a similar meaning, but change the whole context of the piece.
Verse 28 in the same chapter says
"But if you do (have sexual relations/marry), you have not sinned; and if a virgin (has sexual relations/marries), she has not sinned. But those who (have sexual relations/marry) will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."
Verses 37-38 say
"But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to (have sexual relations with/marry) the virgin--this man also does the right thing.
So then, he who (has sexual relations with/marries) the virgin does right, but he who does not (have sexual relations with/marry) her does even better"
Hmmmm... interesting.

After I'd checked out the Bible for myself, I thought it'd be good to see some other people's interpretations. On Christian answers I found the article "Why should I save sex for marriage?" (http://christiananswers.net/q-sum/sum-f001.html)
I read it all and my first impressions were that it is trying very hard to scare people out of sex before marriage: it talks about STDs breaking through protection, sex breaking relationship with God, sex breaking the relationship with the partner, relationship with other Christians, and any further relationship or marriage in your life. Now seriously, it can't be all that bad! My friends are actually doing pretty damn fine without any of the above happening. As far as I can tell that is. The thing is, I don't know about their relationship with God. And that's the one I'm worried about.
Although I found all these verses in the bible, I still don't know all, and that's why I'm writing to you.
But anyway, back to my search...
In this article, I found no reference to any direct verses in the bible that talks about sex out of marriage. Again.

The article talks about the fact that God made us, our bodies, He sent his son to die for us and we should respect it. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20...
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your body."
And that is true; it's a very good point. But who said having sex out of marriage is defiling our bodies? If you Love the person, if it is a show of intimacy and passion rather than a just mad rush of hormones, an act of Love and not of lust, who said we were disrespecting our bodies? Not the bible.
Didn't god create us to be happy? Why would he make our bodies ready for sex at the age of 12 and wanting sex by the age of 16 if we couldn't act on it until we were 20 or so? Did he really aim to torture us this way?

I think not. I think the warnings in the bible are just that: warnings.
1 Corinthians 7:38 says "But those who (have sexual relations/marry) will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."
The rest of the bible talks of sexual immorality that could harm people: gross stuff like sex with animals, sex with family or with a girl who has their period, and hurtful stuff, like sex to someone who already has a partner behind their partner's back.

I have still found not real evidence in the bible of God not wanting us to have sex out of marriages.

This is where I need your help. If I am wrong, PLEASE prove me wrong!
I am a Christian, I Love God, and I Love Jesus. And I would not want to disrespect him purposefully. But as far as I can see, the evidence has been proven. I started with an open mind and this is what I have found.
I just don't want to be wrong.

Thanx for listening

* Luv Karly.A*

Will you stay with this guy for the rest of your life?

That is the question that should be in the back of your mind. Not how long you stayed with him, or how hard the circumstances are. If you stay with him the rest of your life, then it's perfectly okay in my book.

 

[Exegete12]

Welcome to the board Karly.

First I've cut out all your dribble ...

Please answer me one question:

Why have you posted this question to the Non-Christian Forum board?

 

[Arthra]

Well people want to know if they can have sex outside marriage... of course they "can" but they are usually breaking religious laws when they do this...

Basically this is called fornication ...unmarried people have relations.

The wiki is becoming my standard reference but the articles are usually pretty comprehensive:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fornication

 

[français]

Hey, it's your life.. if you want to do it, do it!

now personally, maybe you should make a commitment that in the eyes of God is a marriage. like during the times of the first century, although lots of people did get married through government records, there were those who just made a commitment to each other, and in God's eyes it is considered marriage or something.

 

[peaceful soul]

Hey, it's your life.. if you want to do it, do it!

now personally, maybe you should make a commitment that in the eyes of God is a marriage. like during the times of the first century, although lots of people did get married through government records, there were those who just made a commitment to each other, and in God's eyes it is considered marriage or something.

In addition to making a vow before God by both parties, they should get a formal marriage licence to honor the law. God set government to rule over us in earthly matters. We are to obey the law unless it disregards our obligation to God. That is not to be interpreted that we can break laws because we think they go against God's word. In that case, we should be working to get such laws overturned while. It would also depend upon the nature of the law and its deviciveness.

In my view, the proper way to do it is to come to that committment before God individually and then make that committment before each other, then officially make it legal. Without the legal aspect, I fell that a marriage is not really a marriage even if you vow before God. Why? Because you are not obeying the law of the land, which God has put above you in social and civil relations with another.

 

[Ramona]

That's funny, I've actually been struggling with the same problem lately.

I'm sort-of dating an amazing person (we want a few weeks to get our grades up, stop missing home, and just generally get our lives sorted out before starting a relationship) at the same time that I am surrounded by sex at a university. Needless to say, I am an extremely frustrated eighteen-year-old...not good for maintaining my vow of celibacy.

I do think that it's important to keep this vow. I promised God that I would not make any kind of sexual contact before united with one man forever in His eyes. That's just how I roll. No, I do not think that I will break this promise, as tempting as it often is; I mean, college is pretty much a buffet if you allow it to be! But that's not for me.

As a friend advised me, do what makes you happy---not temporarily, but in the long run.

Love,
Mumbai

 

[peaceful soul]

That's funny, I've actually been struggling with the same problem lately.

I'm sort-of dating an amazing person (we want a few weeks to get our grades up, stop missing home, and just generally get our lives sorted out before starting a relationship) at the same time that I am surrounded by sex at a university. Needless to say, I am an extremely frustrated eighteen-year-old...not good for maintaining my vow of celibacy.

I do think that it's important to keep this vow. I promised God that I would not make any kind of sexual contact before united with one man forever in His eyes. That's just how I roll. No, I do not think that I will break this promise, as tempting as it often is; I mean, college is pretty much a buffet if you allow it to be! But that's not for me.

As a friend advised me, do what makes you happy---not temporarily, but in the long run.

Love,
Mumbai

My rule is to never do anything where I leave God out of the picture. If I want to get married, it will be done with lots of thoughts and prayer. I would ask God to chose my mate instead of going by my own standards. If I felt compelled to marry, I would not unless I see that it is of God's guidance. That requires being patient and continually listening to God - not listening to yourself.

If you are serious about putting God first, He will show you the way and give you signs that will indicate what to do. What I find most often is that God will bring up a situation that will move me away from a situation that He does not want me to be involved in and move me to somethig that He wants for me. Sometimes I discern it immediately while other times, I see it over tiime. Onve I realize, I always stop and say "Thank you God" for not allowing me to excerise my own choices that would have lead me to the wrong place. That is my best advice to any Christian.

I pray for God's guidance and protection over you in all matters.

Shalom!

 

[morningstar2651]

Hi

I'm a 17yr old Christian and have been with my boyfriend for 6 months now. We are both Christians and struggle allot with the idea of sex.
We have used our self control so many times under the hardest circumstances... 3 of my closest friends have made love to their long-term boyfriends, more than a third of my friends (guys AND girls) have also done it too, and sex is talked about openly and freely between people I am usually around. SO we start thinking, they can do it, why can't we?!
They haven't been damned to hell or anything, they're relationship hasn't broken up with mistrust... if anything it has strengthened their relationships. What I'm saying is that sex has really had no negative effect on any of my 3best friends lives, one of them is Christian and still goes to church. (The other two just have the typical teenage view "can't be bothered to think about that boring stuff") but all three live happy, healthy lives.
Basically, sex has become a less formal event and instead is generally known (between my group of friends especially) to be practically inevitable between any serious relationship.

So I think to myself, why not us.
And I came online to check it out...

First I went to one of the many sites with the complete bible and searched for every reference to the word sex. Surprisingly to me, it occurred quite a few times! And still, I found no actual verse or chapter that said do not have sex out of marriage.
There are heaps of passages that say, "do not commit sexual immorality", but there is a passage that explains exactly what that is... Leviticus 18. Basically it says not to have sex to any of your relations, any married person, with animals or with a women who are having their period. Nothing about sex out of marriage.
There are also many passages that say "do not commit adultery" but what exactly is adultery? So I searched for the word and read every passage that mentions it. I found that almost every time it was written, it was linked to the words "unfaithfulness" and "prostitution". Now I know what they are. They are sex to another person whilst you are married. In Proverbs 5:20, the bible Sais "Why be captivated, my son, by an adulteress?" It then goes on to clarify this with "Why embrace the bosom of another man's wife?" So there we have a definition of adultery: a married person having sex to someone who is not his or her spouse. There are many other references to this definition, but nowhere does it give the meaning that it is just sex without being married to the person. Again, nothing about sex out of marriage.

During my searches I found 1 Corinthians 7. All about marriage. Supposedly. The thing that started me thinking was the footnote under it all, referring to the very first verse. The verse goes "Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry", but the footnote underneath (bible.gospelcom.net, the New International Version) reads " Or 'It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.'" This started me thinking, if one word "marry" can be replaced with "sexual relations" why can't the word likewise be changed if it is written again by the same person, in the same piece or writing, in the same context. I know the bible has been translated, and how hard it is to interchange some words between languages. Words could be replaced with words that have a similar meaning, but change the whole context of the piece.
Verse 28 in the same chapter says
"But if you do (have sexual relations/marry), you have not sinned; and if a virgin (has sexual relations/marries), she has not sinned. But those who (have sexual relations/marry) will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."
Verses 37-38 say
"But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to (have sexual relations with/marry) the virgin--this man also does the right thing.
So then, he who (has sexual relations with/marries) the virgin does right, but he who does not (have sexual relations with/marry) her does even better"
Hmmmm... interesting.

After I'd checked out the Bible for myself, I thought it'd be good to see some other people's interpretations. On Christian answers I found the article "Why should I save sex for marriage?" (http://christiananswers.net/q-sum/sum-f001.html)
I read it all and my first impressions were that it is trying very hard to scare people out of sex before marriage: it talks about STDs breaking through protection, sex breaking relationship with God, sex breaking the relationship with the partner, relationship with other Christians, and any further relationship or marriage in your life. Now seriously, it can't be all that bad! My friends are actually doing pretty damn fine without any of the above happening. As far as I can tell that is. The thing is, I don't know about their relationship with God. And that's the one I'm worried about.
Although I found all these verses in the bible, I still don't know all, and that's why I'm writing to you.
But anyway, back to my search...
In this article, I found no reference to any direct verses in the bible that talks about sex out of marriage. Again.

The article talks about the fact that God made us, our bodies, He sent his son to die for us and we should respect it. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20...
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your body."
And that is true; it's a very good point. But who said having sex out of marriage is defiling our bodies? If you Love the person, if it is a show of intimacy and passion rather than a just mad rush of hormones, an act of Love and not of lust, who said we were disrespecting our bodies? Not the bible.
Didn't god create us to be happy? Why would he make our bodies ready for sex at the age of 12 and wanting sex by the age of 16 if we couldn't act on it until we were 20 or so? Did he really aim to torture us this way?

I think not. I think the warnings in the bible are just that: warnings.
1 Corinthians 7:38 says "But those who (have sexual relations/marry) will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."
The rest of the bible talks of sexual immorality that could harm people: gross stuff like sex with animals, sex with family or with a girl who has their period, and hurtful stuff, like sex to someone who already has a partner behind their partner's back.

I have still found not real evidence in the bible of God not wanting us to have sex out of marriages.

This is where I need your help. If I am wrong, PLEASE prove me wrong!
I am a Christian, I Love God, and I Love Jesus. And I would not want to disrespect him purposefully. But as far as I can see, the evidence has been proven. I started with an open mind and this is what I have found.
I just don't want to be wrong.

Thanx for listening

* Luv Karly.A*

Back in the day, there was no such thing as premarital sex. Sex was the consummation of marriage.

 

[Isis-Astoroth]

I don't religion should ever dictate what the heart decides. I've found that often instincts are the real thing. I think if you really truely believe that the person you are with is worth it, then you shouldn't need to keep up the barrier between the two of you and sex. Couples that love each other shouldn't be expected to wait til marriage when they may have to wait even more than 10 years. For something as natural as sex, I personally believe it an abomination to make it effectively 'banned' til marriage. Marriage doesn't make a loving couple.

 

[mastromatteom1]

If two people do not love each other enough to get married before the eyes of God (that is, declare a permanent commitment of monogamy), then they don't love each other enough to be having sex.

Why would you share your body with someone who does not love you and respect you? Even if a person says he/she is in love with you, you cannot trust them until they demonstrate that love by marrying you. It's the only way to be sure (I know from personal experience, you can't trust people of the opposite sex). Any person who claims to love you but won't marry you is a liar who is just trying to use your body for a toy until somebody else comes along they like better--if it's really love, what reason could there possibly be not to get married?

 

[Isis-Astoroth]

The idea of marriage doesn't suit everyone. I don't know if I could marry but that doesn't mean to say that I don't love my boyfriend as much as I could. Marriage isn't the benchmark you put relationships up against to see how each person loves the other.

 

[LightOfEyes]

Hi

I'm a 17yr old Christian and have been with my boyfriend for 6 months now. We are both Christians and struggle allot with the idea of sex.
We have used our self control so many times under the hardest circumstances... 3 of my closest friends have made love to their long-term boyfriends, more than a third of my friends (guys AND girls) have also done it too, and sex is talked about openly and freely between people I am usually around. SO we start thinking, they can do it, why can't we?!
They haven't been damned to hell or anything, they're relationship hasn't broken up with mistrust... if anything it has strengthened their relationships. What I'm saying is that sex has really had no negative effect on any of my 3best friends lives, one of them is Christian and still goes to church. (The other two just have the typical teenage view "can't be bothered to think about that boring stuff") but all three live happy, healthy lives.
Basically, sex has become a less formal event and instead is generally known (between my group of friends especially) to be practically inevitable between any serious relationship.

So I think to myself, why not us.
And I came online to check it out...

First I went to one of the many sites with the complete bible and searched for every reference to the word sex. Surprisingly to me, it occurred quite a few times! And still, I found no actual verse or chapter that said do not have sex out of marriage.
There are heaps of passages that say, "do not commit sexual immorality", but there is a passage that explains exactly what that is... Leviticus 18. Basically it says not to have sex to any of your relations, any married person, with animals or with a women who are having their period. Nothing about sex out of marriage.
There are also many passages that say "do not commit adultery" but what exactly is adultery? So I searched for the word and read every passage that mentions it. I found that almost every time it was written, it was linked to the words "unfaithfulness" and "prostitution". Now I know what they are. They are sex to another person whilst you are married. In Proverbs 5:20, the bible Sais "Why be captivated, my son, by an adulteress?" It then goes on to clarify this with "Why embrace the bosom of another man's wife?" So there we have a definition of adultery: a married person having sex to someone who is not his or her spouse. There are many other references to this definition, but nowhere does it give the meaning that it is just sex without being married to the person. Again, nothing about sex out of marriage.

During my searches I found 1 Corinthians 7. All about marriage. Supposedly. The thing that started me thinking was the footnote under it all, referring to the very first verse. The verse goes "Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry", but the footnote underneath (bible.gospelcom.net, the New International Version) reads " Or 'It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.'" This started me thinking, if one word "marry" can be replaced with "sexual relations" why can't the word likewise be changed if it is written again by the same person, in the same piece or writing, in the same context. I know the bible has been translated, and how hard it is to interchange some words between languages. Words could be replaced with words that have a similar meaning, but change the whole context of the piece.
Verse 28 in the same chapter says
"But if you do (have sexual relations/marry), you have not sinned; and if a virgin (has sexual relations/marries), she has not sinned. But those who (have sexual relations/marry) will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."
Verses 37-38 say
"But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to (have sexual relations with/marry) the virgin--this man also does the right thing.
So then, he who (has sexual relations with/marries) the virgin does right, but he who does not (have sexual relations with/marry) her does even better"
Hmmmm... interesting.

After I'd checked out the Bible for myself, I thought it'd be good to see some other people's interpretations. On Christian answers I found the article "Why should I save sex for marriage?" (http://christiananswers.net/q-sum/sum-f001.html)
I read it all and my first impressions were that it is trying very hard to scare people out of sex before marriage: it talks about STDs breaking through protection, sex breaking relationship with God, sex breaking the relationship with the partner, relationship with other Christians, and any further relationship or marriage in your life. Now seriously, it can't be all that bad! My friends are actually doing pretty damn fine without any of the above happening. As far as I can tell that is. The thing is, I don't know about their relationship with God. And that's the one I'm worried about.
Although I found all these verses in the bible, I still don't know all, and that's why I'm writing to you.
But anyway, back to my search...
In this article, I found no reference to any direct verses in the bible that talks about sex out of marriage. Again.

The article talks about the fact that God made us, our bodies, He sent his son to die for us and we should respect it. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20...
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your body."
And that is true; it's a very good point. But who said having sex out of marriage is defiling our bodies? If you Love the person, if it is a show of intimacy and passion rather than a just mad rush of hormones, an act of Love and not of lust, who said we were disrespecting our bodies? Not the bible.
Didn't god create us to be happy? Why would he make our bodies ready for sex at the age of 12 and wanting sex by the age of 16 if we couldn't act on it until we were 20 or so? Did he really aim to torture us this way?

I think not. I think the warnings in the bible are just that: warnings.
1 Corinthians 7:38 says "But those who (have sexual relations/marry) will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."
The rest of the bible talks of sexual immorality that could harm people: gross stuff like sex with animals, sex with family or with a girl who has their period, and hurtful stuff, like sex to someone who already has a partner behind their partner's back.

I have still found not real evidence in the bible of God not wanting us to have sex out of marriages.

This is where I need your help. If I am wrong, PLEASE prove me wrong!
I am a Christian, I Love God, and I Love Jesus. And I would not want to disrespect him purposefully. But as far as I can see, the evidence has been proven. I started with an open mind and this is what I have found.
I just don't want to be wrong.

Thanx for listening

* Luv Karly.A*

Peace be upon you sister,

If the bible does not forbid sex, then you can find this in the holy Quran it’s more reliable clearly forbids sex:

[17:32] And come not near to the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a Fâhishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits: a great sin), and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allâh forgives him).

Peace.

 

[rosenherman]

I slept with half a dozen men before I met my husband. I wish I'd waited because I found that the love I make with the man I loved, and who loved me enough to settle down and marry was way better than anything previous. I wish I'd been able to give my husband my virginity, but he's great enough to know I'm not comparing him to anyone else. If you wait for the man you marry, you won't be missing anything; except, diseases, unintended pregnancies and wondering if he really loves you or is using you. You'll never really know.

 

[mastromatteom1]

It's not about the ceremony of marriage as much as it is about commitment. When you're in true love with a person, you don't even notice others of the opposite sex, and so you feel ready to make a lifelong commitment. If you have doubts about wanting to be exclusive with that person, it's probably not true love. Personally I wouldn't want to share my body with someone I didn't truly love or who didn't truly love me... I think it's important to have high standards for what I do with my body and to tell people, "If you don't love me enough to make an exclusive commitment, you can't have my body."

The purpose of the Christian marriage ceremony is declare your commitment not only to each other but also to God, by having a relationship based on God. There is no other foundation for a relationship that is strong enough to ensure that the relationship endures. The reason why there are so many divorces is that couples don't consider it important to have a spiritual foundation anymore--it's just about sex. But the sex probably isn't even that good for them because they don't have any type of spiritual connection with each other.