Hello
@anonomis, first off,
WELCOME TO CF I'm glad that you found us and joined in the discussions with us
I'm sorry to hear about your ongoing struggles with sexual sin, but as a Christian, you are hardly alone in this .. e.g.
1 Peter 5:8-9 (which is why I was surprised to read that no one in your church offered to help you with it, or even wanted to talk about it .. did you ever talk to your pastor? .. if not, I would recommend that you do so, privately, of course).
The thing is, even as a believer, temptations to sin will continue to come your way for the rest of your life, so you need to learn how to deal with them/turn away from them/how to stop them in their tracks (so to speak), the temptations that enter your mind, that is, and that from the very moment that they do!
The visual piece is a HUGE problem for sexual sin, so learning to consciously and consistently turn away from visual triggers is imperative. In the end however, whether the temptation originates from what you see, or comes into your mind as a thought given to you by our common enemy (or both), etc., it is those kind of 'thoughts' that need to be stopped/
REFUSED by you, before they become sin.
The Bible tells us to take all such thoughts "
captive", and to give them over to the Lord to deal with (instead of trying to deal with them ourselves) .. e.g.
2 Corinthians 10:5 (see below). This is something that you may have to do over and over and over again, at times, so it is hardly an easy thing to do. It is, however, one of the principal ways that we obey another command that is given to us, one that comes with a wonderful promise attached to it, as well
.. e.g.
James 4:7 (cf
1 Peter 5:8-9).
2 Corinthians 10
3 Though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.
4 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.
5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
James 4
7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
The above will not come easily or quickly, especially at first. IOW, you will fail, and you will probably do so often (again, at first). The good news is, God has an ongoing remedy for a believer's ongoing sins, yes ..
1 John 1:9, so when you fail, ask the Lord to forgive you and cleanse you (He promises us that He will), then get up and get back to your walk with Him/to growing up in Him (back to your fight against both sin and the enemy) ... again and again and again, as often as you need to in the moment (the devil often needs convincing that you are not an easy target for his
flaming arrows anymore .. e.g.
Ephesians 6:16, before he'll decide to move on to easier targets, that is
).
Finally (for now), and most importantly, continue to grow in your knowledge and understanding of God and His word, and practice His presence in your daily life in EVERYTHING that you do .. e.g.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (believe it or not, the Creator and Lord of the Universe wants to be a big part of your daily life, of everything in your life
). So,
delight yourself in Him, and learn to make Him the most important, moment-by-moment center of everything in your life, and much of the practical means that we use to avoid sin (and the temptations that drive us to it) will become easier and easier for you
(start small by looking for ways to rejoice in Him and give thanks to Him throughout your day, even the smallest or simplest of things)
1 Thessalonians 5
16 Rejoice always;
17 pray without ceasing;
18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
Psalm 37
4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.
Praying for you!
God bless you!!
--David
p.s. - one last thing, did you know that, as a believer/as His adopted daughter, God's love for you is the same as He is, "
from everlasting"? This means that there was never a time in eternity past when He did not already love you (long before you were you/before you existed), and that there will never be such a time, now, or forevermore
This also means that God knew EXACTLY what He was doing and getting when He saved you (and me), so nothing that we ever do will be a surprise to Him (or a cause for Him to leave us or forsake us).
As pastor and theologian Charles Spurgeon once said at the end of one of his daily devotional readings (from
Morning and Evening), "
everlasting love shall be the pillow for my head this night".