"We live by hope, not biology."

[Paidiske]

Single Christian Women Are Much More Than Their Wombs

The early church elevated females for their faith witness, not their fertility. We should do the same today.

www.christianitytoday.com

I did appreciate this article looking at how people in church consider singleness for women.

 

[PloverWing]

I think I haven't been listening in the right places. Is the church pressuring single women to marry, but only the women?

I do agree, though, that single people in the church should be respected as full adults, with their own ministries -- that they're not just in a state of waiting around to be married. There was wisdom in the medieval church's honoring of single Christians. The "medieval church with its virgin martyrs and mystical visions" is actually not too weird for me.

 

[Paidiske]

My sense, from talking to my single friends (because I have not been single long term, as an adult), is that single women in particular feel that the church marginalises them. That things in church are geared to married women and mothers, and that you haven't really arrived at maturity until you reach that point. And that your gifts and potential contributions aren't taken seriously. I remember one friend who was working on her PhD, who told me once that it hurt her that if she did finish the doctorate, the church would never acknowledge or celebrate it, but they'd throw kitchen teas and baby showers and acknowledge and celebrate those kinds of milestones.

I've certainly heard loud and clear from single people in church that they feel overlooked in church cultures where everything is geared around families. (And you can see that kind of complaint here in the singles forum, particularly). And in a church culture where the full participation of women is already in question, I think women feel that in a particular way.

 

[PloverWing]

You make some good points. I didn't realize it hit women more than men, but I have seen churchwide events that are very focused on married couples with children, and I remember some of the discomfort at such events from when I was single in my 20s.