- Aug 24, 2022
- 46
- 20
- 33
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Single
Been an addiction since I was a kid probably, have used it as an escape from problems, release from stress/anxiety/depression..etc.
I keep going back and forth between following Jesus pretty strongly for maybe a few weeks then I backslide and quit reading the scriptures/praying as much and instead maybe watching porn and being selfish and whatnot.
I have been feeling pretty good and positive all week then last night I masturbated about 2 times and was texting with a woman sexually and can't help but feel like I've fallen away from God now and that he is angry with me. It's like the sexual energy just builds up and builds up and then I'll be getting random erections and strong sexual thoughts and urges (even at times that I'd rather not have one as it could result in humiliation) and it leads me to just give in and I tell myself "Well at least I got that out of my system now." but it doesn't help the guilt and actually makes me feel more depression/anxious and less confident in the days following that but I keep repeating the behavior. Hoping someone else has struggled with the same issue and has some advice, thanks.
I keep going back and forth between following Jesus pretty strongly for maybe a few weeks then I backslide and quit reading the scriptures/praying as much and instead maybe watching porn and being selfish and whatnot.
I have been feeling pretty good and positive all week then last night I masturbated about 2 times and was texting with a woman sexually and can't help but feel like I've fallen away from God now and that he is angry with me. It's like the sexual energy just builds up and builds up and then I'll be getting random erections and strong sexual thoughts and urges (even at times that I'd rather not have one as it could result in humiliation) and it leads me to just give in and I tell myself "Well at least I got that out of my system now." but it doesn't help the guilt and actually makes me feel more depression/anxious and less confident in the days following that but I keep repeating the behavior. Hoping someone else has struggled with the same issue and has some advice, thanks.