- Oct 8, 2018
- 4
- 3
- 29
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
Hi,
I am new here and I signed up because I’m at a crisis in my life and really need some godly advice. I hope I’m at the right place and someone can help me make a big decision. I know it’s long but if you can read and help me I’d appreciate it so much.
My question is basically regarding whether or not I have a legit reason to divorce my wife based on a recent event.
We dated for 2 years and got married in January of this year. She is 20 and I am 23 years old. Honestly looking back on it, we had no business getting married due to the amount of hurt and tension that existed already. However, it doesn’t make sense to regret the past, I just need to know what I should do next. My wife has always had a lying problem. Before we got married I caught her in dozens of lies. It once got so bad that she had moved in with an ex and was lying about where she was living. She lied about past affairs and all kinds of things. I somehow saw the good in her though and forced myself to believe her every time she said it was the last lie. Again, I realize now 100% that marriage was a horrible idea so please don’t reiterate that lol.
Anyway, a couple days ago I noticed that her google account was logged into my computer. I suppose she logged in and forgot to log out when we used it. Being that we have zero trust as is, I went though her history (I can see what her account has done on all her devices (cell phone included). Turns out, she has been looking up her ex (the same one she has lied about before) on instagram and Twitter and Facebook almost every single week or every few days for the past 5 months. I confronted her about it and she lied many times until I printed out the history pages and showed her proof. Then she admitted. She said she didn’t contact him just looked at pics because she misses how he treated her and I don’t treat her right. Granted, I haven’t treated her great lately and we have had a ton of fighting. Plus I’m gone all the time with work and school.
A day later, I went further into her history and found that she searched several times for “how to delete message and phone call history” and searched for “hotel rooms” near where her ex lives. I confronted her and she lied several more times denying it all. Again I proved that I knew and she finally admitted and said that she “planned to cheat” but never went through with it. She got too nervous every time and didn’t actually contact him or do it. She just looked up hotels and how to erase her tracks or if she did cheat.
Honestly, I’m so sick and tired of catching her in lies it’s unbelievable. I feel like our trust is fried and always will be. I feel like she can never be honest with me about anything. And he ex will never disappear. Being that she “wanted” to cheat, am I justified to divorce in God’s eyes? I want to be in God’s will and if that means roughing it out I will. Please help me, I need help making this huge decision and most of all I need to know if I am justified by the Lord because of the adultery in her heart or if divorce would be sin.
I am new here and I signed up because I’m at a crisis in my life and really need some godly advice. I hope I’m at the right place and someone can help me make a big decision. I know it’s long but if you can read and help me I’d appreciate it so much.
My question is basically regarding whether or not I have a legit reason to divorce my wife based on a recent event.
We dated for 2 years and got married in January of this year. She is 20 and I am 23 years old. Honestly looking back on it, we had no business getting married due to the amount of hurt and tension that existed already. However, it doesn’t make sense to regret the past, I just need to know what I should do next. My wife has always had a lying problem. Before we got married I caught her in dozens of lies. It once got so bad that she had moved in with an ex and was lying about where she was living. She lied about past affairs and all kinds of things. I somehow saw the good in her though and forced myself to believe her every time she said it was the last lie. Again, I realize now 100% that marriage was a horrible idea so please don’t reiterate that lol.
Anyway, a couple days ago I noticed that her google account was logged into my computer. I suppose she logged in and forgot to log out when we used it. Being that we have zero trust as is, I went though her history (I can see what her account has done on all her devices (cell phone included). Turns out, she has been looking up her ex (the same one she has lied about before) on instagram and Twitter and Facebook almost every single week or every few days for the past 5 months. I confronted her about it and she lied many times until I printed out the history pages and showed her proof. Then she admitted. She said she didn’t contact him just looked at pics because she misses how he treated her and I don’t treat her right. Granted, I haven’t treated her great lately and we have had a ton of fighting. Plus I’m gone all the time with work and school.
A day later, I went further into her history and found that she searched several times for “how to delete message and phone call history” and searched for “hotel rooms” near where her ex lives. I confronted her and she lied several more times denying it all. Again I proved that I knew and she finally admitted and said that she “planned to cheat” but never went through with it. She got too nervous every time and didn’t actually contact him or do it. She just looked up hotels and how to erase her tracks or if she did cheat.
Honestly, I’m so sick and tired of catching her in lies it’s unbelievable. I feel like our trust is fried and always will be. I feel like she can never be honest with me about anything. And he ex will never disappear. Being that she “wanted” to cheat, am I justified to divorce in God’s eyes? I want to be in God’s will and if that means roughing it out I will. Please help me, I need help making this huge decision and most of all I need to know if I am justified by the Lord because of the adultery in her heart or if divorce would be sin.