Is my marriage even valid? Can I remarry?

[Lee81]

1. I just read in the bible that if a woman remarried after a divorce that the man she remarried would be guilty of adultery, so according to this I am living in adultery. She's been married twice before and divorced both her husband's they did not cheat on her which the bible says is only biblical grounds for divorce and remarriage. So is my marriage even valid in God's eyes?

2. I'm currently separated from her after 1 year of marriage for like the 5th time. In the past she's threatened to kill me for dripping water on the carpet after bathing her daughter, cut my balls off, had an emotional affair with her ex, abused her prescription amphetamines that turn her into Satan himself when she withdraws from them halfway through the month bc she took all her pills in 10 days. She's verbally abusive to me and her 2 year old daughter whom I have to protect from her own mother as her step father. She flies into fits of rage and let's out blood curdling screams that could only be manifested from the pits of hell. She gets insanly jealous when i talk to my family and tries to keep me isolated from them and my friends. I started fasting and praying to seek discernment from God and she went into a demonic onslaught against me for doing it. I had a hernia and couldn't work for a month and she demanded I get a job so I could continue supporting her like I am "supposed to". She's blown through $25,000 of my savings and the $100,000 worth of income we made since we've been together up until now in 18 months. I finally had enough and moved home with my parents so I could have have my surgery and get back on my feet.

3. I've been doing a lot of reading on spiritual warfare and am pretty sure I am up against a Jezebel spirit along with hundreds more. I'm pretty sure she suffers from narcissistic personality disorder, she has a complete lack of empathy for anyone or thing. I know there's a good person down inside there somewhere Ive seen it, but the darkness just has too much control, deliverance doesn't work unless the person wants to change and live for Jesus. She is so proud and will not ever admit she is wrong no matter what facts you present her. I've been a loving, caring, and ever so patient husband like the bible tells me to be. But I am at my wits end, there's no hope in sight. She says she's a Christian and saved but has openly mocked Jesus and made fun of him. I am currently filing for divorce. Will I be able to remarry after divorcing someone like this? I literally feel like I am married to the Devil, and am raising a rebellious teenaged girl instead of sharing the joys of a wife. When shes angry i dont see the woman i fell in love with anymore, just pure evil staring back at me with a look that could kill, that pierces me to my very soul and chills me to the bones because I know the truth about the darkness that lives inside her. I no longer feel love but resentment from her. According to the bible if I do remarry I will be committing adultery with my next wife since I am not divorcing my wife on grounds of adultery. That's why I am asking if my marriage was even valid to begin with in the eyes of God, is it like I was never married in the first place? Will I be able to remarry without it being considered adultery? Or am I doomed to being single the rest of my life? I just cant see God blaming me for divorcing her and moving onto someone else to live a happy life with. He made us so we could have joy and peace and live life more abundantly.

 

[A_Thinker]

1. I just read in the bible that if a woman remarried after a divorce that the man she remarried would be guilty of adultery, so according to this I am living in adultery. She's been married twice before and divorced both her husband's they did not cheat on her which the bible says is only biblical grounds for divorce and remarriage. So is my marriage even valid in God's eyes?

2. I'm currently separated from her after 1 year of marriage for like the 5th time. In the past she's threatened to kill me for dripping water on the carpet after bathing her daughter, cut my balls off, had an emotional affair with her ex, abused her prescription amphetamines that turn her into Satan himself when she withdraws from them halfway through the month bc she took all her pills in 10 days. She's verbally abusive to me and her 2 year old daughter whom I have to protect from her own mother as her step father. She flies into fits of rage and let's out blood curdling screams that could only be manifested from the pits of hell. She gets insanly jealous when i talk to my family and tries to keep me isolated from them and my friends. I started fasting and praying to seek discernment from God and she went into a demonic onslaught against me for doing it. I had a hernia and couldn't work for a month and she demanded I get a job so I could continue supporting her like I am "supposed to". She's blown through $25,000 of my savings and the $100,000 worth of income we made since we've been together up until now in 18 months. I finally had enough and moved home with my parents so I could have have my surgery and get back on my feet.

3. I've been doing a lot of reading on spiritual warfare and am pretty sure I am up against a Jezebel spirit along with hundreds more. I'm pretty sure she suffers from narcissistic personality disorder, she has a complete lack of empathy for anyone or thing. I know there's a good person down inside there somewhere Ive seen it, but the darkness just has too much control, deliverance doesn't work unless the person wants to change and live for Jesus. She is so proud and will not ever admit she is wrong no matter what facts you present her. I've been a loving, caring, and ever so patient husband like the bible tells me to be. But I am at my wits end, there's no hope in sight. She says she's a Christian and saved but has openly mocked Jesus and made fun of him. I am currently filing for divorce. Will I be able to remarry after divorcing someone like this? I literally feel like I am married to the Devil, and am raising a rebellious teenaged girl instead of sharing the joys of a wife. When shes angry i dont see the woman i fell in love with anymore, just pure evil staring back at me with a look that could kill, that pierces me to my very soul and chills me to the bones because I know the truth about the darkness that lives inside her. I no longer feel love but resentment from her. According to the bible if I do remarry I will be committing adultery with my next wife since I am not divorcing my wife on grounds of adultery. That's why I am asking if my marriage was even valid to begin with in the eyes of God, is it like I was never married in the first place? Will I be able to remarry without it being considered adultery? Or am I doomed to being single the rest of my life? I just cant see God blaming me for divorcing her and moving onto someone else to live a happy life with. He made us so we could have joy and peace and live life more abundantly.

The Catholic Church would annul your marriage ... for a fee ...

Your wife's prior marriages would invalidate your marriage from a Catholic standpoint, and there was adultery, as well.

The Catholic Church could determine that she was never "fit" to marry.

I think I would try to stay single for awhile ...

 

[ValleyGal]

Here is a biblical study site that will give you some insight into divorce and marrying again after divorce. Divorce is not some unforgivable sin that leaves you alone and lonely for the rest of your life. There is hope!
Bible Teachings and Bible Messages.

 

[joshua 1 9]

deliverance doesn't work unless the person wants to change and live for Jesus

Exactly, she has to want to be delivered, it is her choice and she is the only one that can make that choice. God will not interfere, He leaves it up to us to make our choices in life. We can choose life or death, sickness or health, blessing or curse, poverty or prosperity. Each individual has to make their own choice in life. [/quote]Will I be able to remarry after divorcing someone like this?

Paul said you can get married but you will have problems. First marriage has a 20% divorce rate. People with three or more sex partners have a 50% divorce rate. Also I would not advise getting into a situation with a divorced women again. Any single women in her right mind will stay away from a divorced man because she does not need those sort of problems to deal with. You could always go to a third world nation to find a wife. They maybe willing to lower their standards for the opportunity to come to this country. Be careful though, it is going to be difficult to get the right women when you have a history of choosing the wrong women. Also you may not be as happy with a good wife because you may like the passion of a relationship with the wrong sort of person. You want your wife to be your friend. You do not want to be married to the enemy.

 

[Llleopard]

Use your reserves of courage and run. If your partner has totally broken every vow they made in your marriage service, then the contract you had together has been nullified by them. God does not insist that you stay in an abusive, hideous situation until your health is compromised so much that you eventually can't tell what's right from wrong, or have a physical or mental breakdown.

Stay in the safe space with your folks or someone else you trust, get healthy, and take some time to begin finding out what's normal again - what normal behaviour and relationships look like.

Get divorced, stay single for a good while till you regain some equilibrium. Then maybe think about the future! Yes, you absolutely can get married again. It's not sinful, it's not doomed, and it can be wonderful to choose more carefully the next time and find the love of your life.

The website that ValleyGal shared has some very sensible things to say about the context that 'divorce' scriptures should be read and understood in. Maybe read some of that lot when you feel up to it, and don't panic yourself by taking single verses out of context, or let 'religious' people who haven't been in your situation crush you with uninformed rubbish.

Hang in there, love God, and take care of yourself. You're worth it.

 

[akmom]

Wow, it sounds like you have been through the wringer.

This post shows you are desperate to leave, and considering a handful of legalistic reasons to justify it. I wonder if that is really necessary. That's lawyer speak, and great for getting what you want out of earthly laws. But I don't think that's how we need to approach God's laws... trying to find a way to make our desires be God's will.

Would you rather be guilty of adultery for marrying a divorced woman, or guilty of divorcing a woman against God's will? Either way it would be sin. When Jesus counseled the woman at the well, he didn't discuss the legal nuances of each of her marriages and declare who was technically her husband. He didn't seem too concerned about that. He just said, "Go and sin no more." I don't know what God's will is for you now, or how He wants you to interact with or associate with this woman. But I don't think it hinges on debating these technicalities. I think you can move forward with prayer and obedience, and trust that God will guide you, even reverse course if needed. Just a thought.