Does anyone else find themselves talking to themselves, or someone else

[Brownstoned]

Not outloud... that's just a little weird and psycho. But mentally.
I'm pretty isolated. Like way out of the city, single, no one around, work remote, nearest church an hour away, and not even a church I would agree with. I'm not really making new memories. Like my family is far away, with their kids, hardly respond to my text messages (it literally takes weeks before getting a text back from most of them), vacations, and the things they spend their money on. Any new memories or events would be tasks I finish at work. But those come and go, who cares. Its just a paycheck. So because of this, I just noticed I'm constantly thinking about past memories. This that go way back, and most people would just forget about. Since that's really all I have left. Is stuff from the past.
This became even more apparent when I created a facebook account, and tried sending a few messages to people I knew in the past. I remember detailed conversations with them, especially when it came to conversion and the gospel. Out of about 10 messages to 10 different people, I got a response from 1. And that 1 person basically said they hadn't a clue what I was talking about. Of the other 9, a few I was really good friends with. Played sports with and everything.
I was going thru old text messages that I got no response on, and deleting them. Deleting contacts as well (family that never respond back). So the address book and text message history is just about null.
So anyway, it just occurred to me what I do during the day when not working and cleaning up the phone. Its like pretend conversations about the past, if someone happened to be around.

 

[Occams Barber]

Not outloud... that's just a little weird and psycho. But mentally.
I'm pretty isolated. Like way out of the city, single, no one around, work remote, nearest church an hour away, and not even a church I would agree with. I'm not really making new memories. Like my family is far away, with their kids, hardly respond to my text messages (it literally takes weeks before getting a text back from most of them), vacations, and the things they spend their money on. Any new memories or events would be tasks I finish at work. But those come and go, who cares. Its just a paycheck. So because of this, I just noticed I'm constantly thinking about past memories. This that go way back, and most people would just forget about. Since that's really all I have left. Is stuff from the past.
This became even more apparent when I created a facebook account, and tried sending a few messages to people I knew in the past. I remember detailed conversations with them, especially when it came to conversion and the gospel. Out of about 10 messages to 10 different people, I got a response from 1. And that 1 person basically said they hadn't a clue what I was talking about. Of the other 9, a few I was really good friends with. Played sports with and everything.
I was going thru old text messages that I got no response on, and deleting them. Deleting contacts as well (family that never respond back). So the address book and text message history is just about null.
So anyway, it just occurred to me what I do during the day when not working and cleaning up the phone. Its like pretend conversations about the past, if someone happened to be around.

Talking to yourself is an absolutely normal and natural thing to do.
Why Do I Talk To Myself? Causes and When to Worry (healthline.com)

As for the rest of your post - it sounds like you need a little more distraction in your life. Go for walks, get a hobby, write, read books, get a pet - anything to stop you from focusing too much on yourself.

OB

 

[Brownstoned]

Talking to yourself is an absolutely normal and natural thing to do.
Why Do I Talk To Myself? Causes and When to Worry (healthline.com)

As for the rest of your post - it sounds like you need a little more distraction in your life. Go for walks, get a hobby, write, read books, get a pet - anything to stop you from focusing too much on yourself.

OB

When I say talking to myself, it's more of an imaginary conversation I would have with someone. For example, let's say an old friend actually responded. Or a family member finally decided to text or call back. What would we talk about... I ask myself. Going through my head is basically word for word agendas on what to talk about. I say this, she asks that, we talk about back then when we did this or that. It's all fake, but sort of like prep work for when I get a response. Which rarely happens of course, so not like it really matters. I usually just turn the phone off and ignore email for a few days, since it's become a useless device anyway.
I forgot to mention that I dont go anywhere because of epilepsy. Cant leave the house, or rarely do.

 

[Occams Barber]

When I say talking to myself, it's more of an imaginary conversation I would have with someone. For example, let's say an old friend actually responded. Or a family member finally decided to text or call back. What would we talk about... I ask myself. Going through my head is basically word for word agendas on what to talk about. I say this, she asks that, we talk about back then when we did this or that. It's all fake, but sort of like prep work for when I get a response. Which rarely happens of course, so not like it really matters. I usually just turn the phone off and ignore email for a few days, since it's become a useless device anyway.
I forgot to mention that I dont go anywhere because of epilepsy. Cant leave the house, or rarely do.

Like I said - talking to yourself (or someone else) out loud or mentally is not unusual. If you're concerned about it talk to a psychologist.

I still think you need to get some kind of interest(s) as a bit of a distraction. Are you sure the epilepsy keeps you locked in or, are you perhaps using that as an excuse to stay inside?

Things like books or gardening or a pet can all be done without leaving home.

OB

 

[returntosender]

I guess I'm not normal either, I do all those things you do
Find a friend you can talk to. It helps a lot. Lots of lonely people.

 

[angelsaroundme]

One of the reasons we have labels like "school friends", "work friends", and so on is that for many these friendships don't continue past that environment. You might run into them and smile at each other, but you probably won't stay close. Most of the people I used to know don't respond to me on Facebook or they do briefly and then stop. People have become even more insulated as a result of the pandemic. I think having interests that you can enjoy on your own is almost part of basic survival at this point.

If it helps, you can think of it as doing stuff that will give you more to talk about when you are around other people. Then once you are reading a book, creating something, whatever it is, you'll become engrossed and start enjoying it for itself.

 

[Aussie Pete]

Not outloud... that's just a little weird and psycho. But mentally.
I'm pretty isolated. Like way out of the city, single, no one around, work remote, nearest church an hour away, and not even a church I would agree with. I'm not really making new memories. Like my family is far away, with their kids, hardly respond to my text messages (it literally takes weeks before getting a text back from most of them), vacations, and the things they spend their money on. Any new memories or events would be tasks I finish at work. But those come and go, who cares. Its just a paycheck. So because of this, I just noticed I'm constantly thinking about past memories. This that go way back, and most people would just forget about. Since that's really all I have left. Is stuff from the past.
This became even more apparent when I created a facebook account, and tried sending a few messages to people I knew in the past. I remember detailed conversations with them, especially when it came to conversion and the gospel. Out of about 10 messages to 10 different people, I got a response from 1. And that 1 person basically said they hadn't a clue what I was talking about. Of the other 9, a few I was really good friends with. Played sports with and everything.
I was going thru old text messages that I got no response on, and deleting them. Deleting contacts as well (family that never respond back). So the address book and text message history is just about null.
So anyway, it just occurred to me what I do during the day when not working and cleaning up the phone. Its like pretend conversations about the past, if someone happened to be around.

There is a healthy talking to yourself. David was good at this, as we read in the psalms. I'm not sure that living in the past qualifies as good. Paul said that he forgot what lies behind. That's something I find easy, because of the way that I was raised. Others are different, of course. OB is right, you need to find new interests. The Lord will help you if you ask Him.

 

[dayhiker]

I very seldom talk out loud to myself. But I think to myself a lot.

 

[returntosender]

Post in topics you are interested in. Then you can find people with similar interests and share your opinions. Before you know it you have reasons for PM's

 

[One Old Soul]

I like the quote from the movie cars.

 

[returntosender]

I like the quote from the movie cars.

?

 

[returntosender]

Yes

 

[returntosender]

It's interesting, in thinking about it I think I talk out loud in the store and unfortunately have been caught.