I think this country would have been better off if family's always stayed together. They would never leave. When one married an addition would be added in or a separate building on the same land for the new family and so on. The traditional family is mostly gone, sadly.
The Amish do something
similar. The family lives in the main house on the property. The house is passed on to the son and when he gets engaged a second one is built for the parents. Commonly known as a dawdy haus (pronounced doddy house).
Multigenerational housing or multi familial land is less expensive in the long run. But you need a few things in place to make it work. Most notably a commitment to the family and land. They have to be willing to stay put. You need harmony. Too much bickering takes a toll. They have to be willing to pool their resources and work together.
That's how it was long ago. Which addressed child and senior care. Unmarried children remained at home or on the property. It was easier then because work was localized. Trades were common and that's how most earned a living. Factories changed that. Now you go to work by physically leaving your home.
The most obvious impediment is financial. Working age adults would need a job close to home or opt for self-employment. If you're looking for land you're moving beyond the city and suburbs for the best prices which limit job opportunities. That's why the people doing it now are homesteaders. They supplement their income through self-employment (e.g. YouTube).
It can be done but you need to plan it out and pursue it in the right season. Namely when you're young. Gardening usually goes hand in hand and you need the physical strength to do it. My daughter and I are working towards this. We have time and proficiency on our side. I know how to grow our food and she's going to agriculture school.
The most important element of all is marriage. Managing land is a lot of work. You need hands and men. You don't have to buy anything huge but you need a man nonetheless for security and heavy lifting. Many who take that route have large families or aspire to do so.
That's the caveat no one mentions. It works for the Amish because they marry and have a lot of children and stay together. But the majority don't. Few consider the consequences of remaining alone while they age or the ramifications of divorce. Caring for seniors is a full-time job and you need help. And we're living longer.
If left to their own devices most would never choose this path. They don't want the limitations. They don't want to be stuck in one place and they look forward to the empty nest. But when you live with your family that doesn't happen. You move from one stage to the next and have greater responsibilities.
When you want that life you have to make it easier on your loved ones. Marry well and raise your children with tomorrow in mind. You need a pattern of mutual support. You have to be there for one another in good times and bad. Take care of yourself and be mindful of your health. And be wise with your finances.
Because someone has to pick up the pieces. Living recklessly and neglecting yourself wrong. Someone pays the price for your inaction and you're adding to their plate. You can't live your life on your own terms when you're relying on others. You have to be courteous.
If you don't have those kind of relatives it's hard. You'll spend a lot of time arguing and being frustrated. Most families can't live together for those reasons.
~bella
