Age Requirements?

[graciesings]

What are your age requirements for dates/potential spouses? What's the oldest and youngest you'd date, and why?

 

[Ada Lovelace]

I tend to gravitate towards guys who are slightly older, but wouldn't exclude someone my own age or even a year or two younger who I had a genuine interest in. I've primarily gone to all-girls schools since the 4th grade, so I've obviously never dated a boy from my own school. I've met the guys I've gone out with through social events, youth group at church, tennis, surfing, and my brothers, and haven't always known their age at the time I befriended them. My first serious boyfriend was three years older and we were happily together for more than a year. We're both September babies, but I'm amongst the youngest in my class, and he's amongst the oldest in his. We're just two grades apart. I absolutely loved being with him and felt like the age difference was an asset in many ways. We just had more in common. The major drawback was that when he graduated and moved across country for college we knew it would be virtually impossible to maintain a long distance relationship. We did try for several months, but finally decided to break up as friends. I cried a sea of tears and then moved forward. I started dating another guy I met through surfing who is also three years older, but he goes to a local university I'm interested in attending so we don't have to deal with time differences or long distances. We took a class together this summer and were with each other every day. He sometimes gets a little flak for dating a high school girl, but once his friends have gotten to know me they're more accepting. I do think dating is going to be simpler when I'm in college.

I wouldn't date a guy who is more than three years older at this point in my life because there are too many potential complications that could arise. Guys over 20 who date teens tend to be labeled as predators, as perverts, as exploiters, even if they aren't at all. I also think that it's more challenging when one person in the relationship is a legal adult living outside his parents house, with all the privileges that go along with that, and the other is a minor who still has a curfew and other considerations. College parties crank up at 10 and my curfew is at midnight. I probably wouldn't date a guy who was more than two years younger because it's doubtful we'd have as much common ground.

Once I'm out of college I'd probably be willing to date someone of a different age range.

 

[graciesings]

I tend to gravitate towards guys who are slightly older, but wouldn't exclude someone my own age or even a year or two younger who I had a genuine interest in. I've primarily gone to all-girls schools since the 4th grade, so I've obviously never dated a boy from my own school. I've met the guys I've gone out with through social events, youth group at church, tennis, surfing, and my brothers, and haven't always known their age at the time I befriended them. My first serious boyfriend was three years older and we were happily together for more than a year. We're both September babies, but I'm amongst the youngest in my class, and he's amongst the oldest in his. We're just two grades apart. I absolutely loved being with him and felt like the age difference was an asset in many ways. We just had more in common. The major drawback was that when he graduated and moved across country for college we knew it would be virtually impossible to maintain a long distance relationship. We did try for several months, but finally decided to break up as friends. I cried a sea of tears and then moved forward. I started dating another guy I met through surfing who is also three years older, but he goes to a local university I'm interested in attending so we don't have to deal with time differences or long distances. We took a class together this summer and were with each other every day. He sometimes gets a little flak for dating a high school girl, but once his friends have gotten to know me they're more accepting. I do think dating is going to be simpler when I'm in college.

I wouldn't date a guy who is more than three years older at this point in my life because there are too many potential complications that could arise. Guys over 20 who date teens tend to be labeled as predators, as perverts, as exploiters, even if they aren't at all. I also think that it's more challenging when one person in the relationship is a legal adult living outside his parents house, with all the privileges that go along with that, and the other is a minor who still has a curfew and other considerations. College parties crank up at 10 and my curfew is at midnight. I probably wouldn't date a guy who was more than two years younger because it's doubtful we'd have as much common ground.

Once I'm out of college I'd probably be willing to date someone of a different age range.

Nice to know I'm not the only teenage girl who prefers older guys!

I know what you mean about guys who are "grown up" being looked down on for dating "little girls." That's less of an issue for me because I've moved away from home: I'm living with my grandmother and still (fully) financially supported, but I'm very independent and making my own decisions. The big thing for me is life experience, a lot of older guys are at a different stage in life that it's harder for me to relate to. And there are a lot of small differences, (like them listening to music from the 90s or early 2000s and thinking newer stuff is crap.)

 

[Orange Crow]

What are your age requirements for dates/potential spouses? What's the oldest and youngest you'd date, and why?

Right now I prefer to date someone who has the same age or who is max. 2 years older. I can date somebody who is younger then me but right now it's not something that I like, because I feel that the difference between me and somebody who is at least one year younger is too big.

There may be some exceptions and in a few years I can date somebody who is two years younger, but it's just not something I like at this age.

In a lot of relationships around me, I see that the women are often older then the men in a relationship. Sometimes the difference is only a few months but I've seen a lot of women that are significantly older, 6 months or more. My mother is two years older then my father so I see it often.

I am not sure why, but I think it is not bad either to be in a relationship with someone who is older then me.

 

[Saricharity]

Interesting question.

 

[Orange Crow]

Younger teen boys seem to not take their relationship with Christ seriously.

Something I agree with.

 

[graciesings]

Interesting question.
My boyfriend is 18 and has just left for his first year of college...yes, I am so sad

A word of advice: Be extra sweet and supportive of him. I'm sure he misses you, too... and he ALSO misses his parents, his best friend, his sister, his neighbors, etc. Moving away from home is tough and he probably needs a lot of support and gentleness.

 

[Saricharity]

 

[NamelessHero]

What are your age requirements for dates/potential spouses? What's the oldest and youngest you'd date, and why?

My current GF is 18 (I'm 16, almost 17) I'd say that 2 or 3 years older than me is as high as I'll go. I would probably only date a girl that is a year younger than me.

 

[Ada Lovelace]

It hit me like a ton of bricks today . Spent most of day in tears.

My sister's boyfriend is here and I have felt like a third wheel.

I texted him for a bit but he is so busy finding his way around and getting ready for classes on Tuesday. I wish I started school on Tuesday but we are off until Sept 8th.

*Hugs*

I felt that way last year when my boyfriend moved across country for college. I felt like I'd given him my heart, and there was this gaping wound when he left with it. I know that seems dramatic, but that's the image that kept coming into my mind then.

Time really does help you to mend. You also learn ways to cope. We created habits for staying connected with one another, like FaceTiming at the same time and texting. Hopefully you will be able to stay in touch with him, and feel the comfort of his presence in your life still.

Can you seek out activities to occupy your mind until school begins? When I'm hurting I also need to find a way to engage my mind so it doesn't swell up with emotions and drown me in them. Maybe you could set goals for yourself to accomplish, like finishing paintings, reading books, improving the timing of your runs, learning something new. Do you ever experiment with dancing or yoga? There are some great YouTube tutorials. Also, there's The Daily Burn, which is sort of like Netflix but with exercise classes you follow from home. I think you can get a free trial of it for a month. It's a fun way to explore and learn new types of exercises. Project Gutenberg and Free Library let you download books for free. Maybe you could find out what books you need to read for your English classes this year, and go ahead and download them and make headway now.

Take care

 

[Saricharity]

Thanks