Unanswered prayers

[StuartB]

How do you deal with unanswered prayers? I took to so badly I'm back in sin again. I also wonder what's the point of praying for God to say No, or just not answer at all.

For me, this is a most dangerous game for God to play. Many people will look at rejection or unanswered prayers as either God isn't real (lost faith) or what's the point of praying? If God can do all things, why not just do all things and get it over with?

I just can't pray with faith or expectancy anymore.

 

[Unqualified]

It takes time, be patient. James 1:1-9

Are you going to let your cares separate you from God so that you bear no fruit. Sometimes we experience hard truths with God. God is sovereign, He does what he wants. Remember? Wait on the lord? He wants to bless you in this, in his timing. Too, people are stubborn and may or may not come to the Lord. But God is working, always working. God has a lot on his plate, but He is infinite he wats for the right moments. You should cut him some slack if you want their conversion to be real even if you have to wait your whole life, it will happen.

But if you are sinning with this person then it won’t happen. God hears your prayers, be faithful to Him if you want him to be faithful to you. Sin separates us from God. I know all to well. I have given up girl friends and repented and gone the other way. That was my sin. But when I started obeying him in all things I knew about that’s when it started to change. When I let Him be God it made all the difference in the world. Reach out to him and he will reach out to you. Do your part and He will do the rest.

 

[StuartB]

I'm just finding it too much to live a boring miserable life, when God might or might not do what I hope he will. Right now it seems God wants me to be alone both mentally and physically. Might as well be dead.

 

[Unqualified]

How is Kaley Cuoco? Is she the one your praying for?

 

[StuartB]

How is Kaley Cuoco? Is she the one your praying for?

Yeah. Kaley was on that sitcom Big Bang Theory. During the darkest part of my life, lonely, suffering from severe panic disorder and depression. Kaley was a light from afar. Watching her on that show brought me joy. I can tell you I have a very special place in my heart for Kaley. I doubt I'll ever get to meet her, I keep praying for her in hopes God saves her.

 

[musicalpilgrim]

Our God is awesome, do be assured that he doesn't 'play games'.

It is so important to read the Bible every day, repent of your sins, and trust the Lord Jesus Christ.

Psalms 25 verse 4
Show me your ways, O Lord.
Teach me your paths,
Lead me in your truth and teach me,
For you are the God of my salvation,
On you I wait all the day.

 

[Unqualified]

Yeah. Kaley was on that sitcom Big Bang Theory. During the darkest part of my life, lonely, suffering from severe panic disorder and depression. Kaley was a light from afar. Watching her on that show brought me joy. I can tell you I have a very special place in my heart for Kaley. I doubt I'll ever get to meet her, I keep praying for her in hopes God saves her.

You want to see her in heaven, hah? Wait stars get saved sometimes.

 

[StuartB]

Yes I do. Unlike many "Christians" I have the ability to love and care about others. To me, God is not a Christian. He's far bigger than a religion.

 

[Unqualified]

He loves His people with all their faults, he has unlimited forgiveness for them. Why are you angry at them?

 

[StuartB]

He loves His people with all their faults, he has unlimited forgiveness for them. Why are you angry at them?

I'm not angry at them. I can see their hypocrasy though. And your previous comment sounded a little dismissive.

 

[Unqualified]

Generalizations. Lots of good people in the church. All with strengths and weaknesses, in different stages of growth. Jesus loves the church like his own bride. He tells us to love our wives this way. It’s indispensable to loving people. Can you forgive those who have hypocrisy, you don’t have to be their friend. The church is yours and my hospital to put the sayings of Jesus into practice, to forgive like He does and learn to love the unlovable. Great learning place, and hopefully they will forgive you too. But if they don’t, back to loving them.

 

[StuartB]

I don't go to Church anymore. I noticed many of them believe in a religion and not in Christ. Also, many of them are controlled by the Vatican, which is a highly suspect place. I try to be loving to people, but it's hard when I hate myself and have no reason to like myself or expect anything from a God that can't answer simple prayers of those praying for food or clean water. It seems like God is limited.

 

[YorkieGal]

How do you deal with unanswered prayers? I took to so badly I'm back in sin again. I also wonder what's the point of praying for God to say No, or just not answer at all.

For me, this is a most dangerous game for God to play. Many people will look at rejection or unanswered prayers as either God isn't real (lost faith) or what's the point of praying? If God can do all things, why not just do all things and get it over with?

I just can't pray with faith or expectancy anymore.

I'm sorry you feel down about this.

In another thread, I commented about the false expectations we are given regarding God and answering prayers. I do not believe He's there to answer prayers in the way we have been led to believe and for the exact reason which you now are experiencing.

If we view God as a genie, who just grants wishes, of course we will be angry when they are not answered. Of course we would doubt His existence and of course we would see no real benefit to being answerable to someone we feel ignores us or doesn't care.

God is not there to ease our suffering on Earth or give us anything or even take it away. He is there solely for spiritual salvation once we depart this world. If churches and fellow Christians taught this, there would be no resentment because there would be no false expectation about what it means to be a Christian.

I hope this has helped and I'm sure others will comment with their views.

In the meantime, I hope you find some peace.

 

[StuartB]

I'm sorry you feel down about this.

In another thread, I commented about the false expectations we are given regarding God and answering prayers. I do not believe He's there to answer prayers in the way we have been led to believe and for the exact reason which you now are experiencing.

If we view God as a genie, who just grants wishes, of course we will be angry when they are not answered. Of course we would doubt His existence and of course we would see no real benefit to being answerable to someone we feel ignores us or doesn't care.

God is not there to ease our suffering on Earth or give us anything or even take it away. He is there solely for spiritual salvation once we depart this world. If churches and fellow Christians taught this, there would be no resentment because there would be no false expectation about what it means to be a Christian.

I hope this has helped and I'm sure others will comment with their views.

In the meantime, I hope you find some peace.

Thank you for the kind words and response. While I don't consider God a Christian, Jew, Muslim or any other religious faiths, I respect everyone's beliefs and think all religions have wisdom to them. God being a Genie would be a bad thing lol. I just feel like he doesn't care about getting into people's lives, which he can do at any time (remember Saul) I just have to hope that this world isn't the time to come to the truth. Modern Christianity has bascally doomed most of humanity, making Christ the saviour of a few, not the whole world.

 

[linux.poet]

Prayer isn't a merit measurement, it's a relationship. If another person says "No" to you, or "I don't have an answer for you yet", do you get enraged at them too and act against their interests in retribution? If you say "No" to someone else, is it because you have something against them, or merely because you do not will to do the request? Your no is about the request, not the requestee?

When God doesn't answer your prayer, it's not personal, it's not your fault, and it's not about you. It's not like God is up in heaven counting all of your failings and weaknesses and being like "StuartB isn't up to snuff today, so I'm not going to answer his prayer and answer his enemies' prayers instead." If anyone else prayed the same prayer you did about the exact same matter you did, they would get the exact same answer, because God already knew what he was doing about it from eternity past anyway. The point of prayer is not so you can influence God, it is to communicate with God so that you understand His plans and purposes for your life and others with more clarity.

In this case, you have simply discovered a direction, a path that God does not want you to go (in the case of a no) or a matter in which the God of the Universe does not want to address quite yet. Discovering those things are part of any healthy relationship, and learning to accept them as information rather than obstacles to your interests is important.

 

[StuartB]

Prayer isn't a merit measurement, it's a relationship. If another person says "No" to you, or "I don't have an answer for you yet", do you get enraged at them too and act against their interests in retribution? If you say "No" to someone else, is it because you have something against them, or merely because you do not will to do the request? Your no is about the request, not the requestee?

When God doesn't answer your prayer, it's not personal, it's not your fault, and it's not about you. It's not like God is up in heaven counting all of your failings and weaknesses and being like "StuartB isn't up to snuff today, so I'm not going to answer his prayer and answer his enemies' prayers instead." If anyone else prayed the same prayer you did about the exact same matter you did, they would get the exact same answer, because God already knew what he was doing about it from eternity past anyway. The point of prayer is not so you can influence God, it is to communicate with God so that you understand His plans and purposes for your life and others with more clarity.

In this case, you have simply discovered a direction, a path that God does not want you to go (in the case of a no) or a matter in which the God of the Universe does not want to address quite yet. Discovering those things are part of any healthy relationship, and learning to accept them as information rather than obstacles to your interests is important.

You're missing a point. It's said that "with God all things are possible" and "God can do all things" So surely God would have an answer for everything. I'm living with the attitude "I don't expect anything good to happen, so I won't be disappointed when nothing happens"

 

[linux.poet]

It's said that "with God all things are possible" and "God can do all things" So surely God would have an answer for everything.

Sometimes the answer is along the lines of "wait", "you can solve your own problems" or something along those lines. There's infinite variety of answers to prayer, for God is an infinite God. I think you may not have liked the answer you received, or you don't understand it quite yet.

I'm living with the attitude "I don't expect anything good to happen, so I won't be disappointed when nothing happens"

I would think you have a better spirit than the person who doesn't solve their own problems and waits around, disappointed, for God to solve them. More likely, you are praying for a result from God that you cannot obtain on your own strength, and you are not getting it. Hmm.

10 But he said to her, “You are speaking as one of the foolish women speaks. Shall we actually accept good from God but not accept adversity?” Despite all this, Job did not sin with his lips.

5 Then Jonah left the city and sat down east of it. There he made a shelter for himself and sat under it in the shade, until he could see what would happen in the city. 6 So the Lord God designated a plant, and it grew up over Jonah to be a shade over his head, to [e]relieve him of his discomfort. And Jonah was overjoyed about the plant. 7 But God designated a worm when dawn came the next day, and it attacked the plant and it withered. 8 And when the sun came up God designated a scorching east wind, and the sun beat down on Jonah’s head so that he became faint, and he begged with all his soul to die, saying, “Death is better to me than life!”

9 But God said to Jonah, “Do you have a good reason to be angry about the plant?” And he said, “I have good reason to be angry, even to the point of death!” 10 Then the Lord said, “You had compassion on the plant, for which you did not work and which you did not cause to grow, which came up overnight and perished overnight. 11 Should I not also have compassion on Nineveh, the great city in which there are more than 120,000 people, who do not know the difference between their right hand and their left, as well as many animals?”

I think you may have let Jonah's anger run into bitterness in your heart, you value the answer you want to your prayer more than you value the relationship with God Himself. In our time we shall need to learn to allow God to control the results. This is difficult to explain, but it's like "I'm not going to expect anything good from you at all, because you don't give me what I want, and I'm angry at you for that." The path forward is forgiving God in your heart, I think.

I may still be confused and darkening counsel, but I want to try and understand. I do not want you to live in the anger you have described in the first post, if you can be set free from it.

 

[Berserk]

I'm sure you are frustrated by the tired cliches and evangelical talking points offered in this thread.
What you need is to actively attend a loving prayer group. That way you can feed spiritually off the answered prayers reported by others.
And you need such a support group to deal with your lack of self-respect. Psychological research has demonstrated that people with low self-esteem almost always experience God as cold, distant, and impersonal. I doubt that Bible reading will help you with your current mindset.

When I joined a prayer group, one of its members (Dave) had a painful blood clot from his ankle to his groin area. Despite his pain, he went to eat at Maverick's restaurant across the street from my apartment. A stranger (Mark) approached his table and asked if he had a physical need that needed prayer. Self-conscious in from of listening customers, Dave reluctantly admitted that he did, hoping Mark would pray quietly for his need. But Mark laid hands on him and embarrassed Dave by praying loudly, resulting in his instant healing, as later medical tests confirmed. Being part of
a prayer group with such testimonies can be faith-inspiring even for a skeptic.

 

[StuartB]

Sometimes the answer is along the lines of "wait", "you can solve your own problems" or something along those lines. There's infinite variety of answers to prayer, for God is an infinite God. I think you may not have liked the answer you received, or you don't understand it quite yet.


I would think you have a better spirit than the person who doesn't solve their own problems and waits around, disappointed, for God to solve them. More likely, you are praying for a result from God that you cannot obtain on your own strength, and you are not getting it. Hmm.





I think you may have let Jonah's anger run into bitterness in your heart, you value the answer you want to your prayer more than you value the relationship with God Himself. In our time we shall need to learn to allow God to control the results. This is difficult to explain, but it's like "I'm not going to expect anything good from you at all, because you don't give me what I want, and I'm angry at you for that." The path forward is forgiving God in your heart, I think.

I may still be confused and darkening counsel, but I want to try and understand. I do not want you to live in the anger you have described in the first post, if you can be set free from it.

I don't see it written in any Bible that God says "You can solve your own problems" It seems Christians make things up to defend God lol.

 

[Berserk]

I don't see it written in any Bible that God says "You can solve your own problems" It seems Christians make things up to defend God lol.

You don't want to solve your own problems, despite the many biblical injunctions that wise actions solve many problems.
Are you for real or are you a phony who would rather treat this site like a whine and cheez hour than find a loving small prayer group that would solve your problem with unanswered prayer and a lack of self-respect?