I've decided enough is enough.

[Neostarwcc]

I've recently decided that enough is enough and decided to get weight loss surgery. At my latest weigh in a few weeks ago I weighed almost 440 pounds and I'm not that tall of a person. I am huge and I'm sick of needing a cane everywhere I go and not being able to walk very far and I've pretty much exhausted all other options at this point. The only thing I haven't tried are the weight loss injections but my insurance won't pay for them and they're over $1,000 a month so that's an option that I cannot use anymore. My insurance will however, cover weight loss surgery and I've decided on getting the Lap Band surgery. I've been to the consultation already and I know there is a chance that I not make it alive through the surgery but I am turning 38 in a month and I'm not an morbidly obese 24 year old anymore. I don't want to die when I'm in my 40's I'd like to make it at least until my mid 60's or maybe even 70s/80s if I can push it.

So that being said I am getting the surgery in a few months, normally I would post for prayers a few days or weeks before surgery (And I probably will make another topic closer to my surgery) but my surgery may get bumped up anyway and I was looking for support and prayers on this. Has anyone ever gotten weight loss surgery before and it been successful? I really don't want to go under the knife unless I 1. Have to and 2. Have God to guide me through this so that I can be a success. I've always told myself that my goal is 250-300 lbs but if I get weight loss surgery I can maybe get down to 180 pounds and get a majority of my health risks taken care of. Instead of rolling the dice every year and seeing what medical condition I have this time. The last time it was life threatening blood clots I can't even imagine what would come next. I just... don't want to think about it. Going under the knife is a good idea...

 

[Grip Docility]

I've recently decided that enough is enough and decided to get weight loss surgery. At my latest weigh in a few weeks ago I weighed almost 440 pounds and I'm not that tall of a person. I am huge and I'm sick of needing a cane everywhere I go and not being able to walk very far and I've pretty much exhausted all other options at this point. The only thing I haven't tried are the weight loss injections but my insurance won't pay for them and they're over $1,000 a month so that's an option that I cannot use anymore. My insurance will however, cover weight loss surgery and I've decided on getting the Lap Band surgery. I've been to the consultation already and I know there is a chance that I not make it alive through the surgery but I am turning 38 in a month and I'm not an morbidly obese 24 year old anymore. I don't want to die when I'm in my 40's I'd like to make it at least until my mid 60's or maybe even 70s/80s if I can push it.

So that being said I am getting the surgery in a few months, normally I would post for prayers a few days or weeks before surgery (And I probably will make another topic closer to my surgery) but my surgery may get bumped up anyway and I was looking for support and prayers on this. Has anyone ever gotten weight loss surgery before and it been successful? I really don't want to go under the knife unless I 1. Have to and 2. Have God to guide me through this so that I can be a success. I've always told myself that my goal is 250-300 lbs but if I get weight loss surgery I can maybe get down to 180 pounds and get a majority of my health risks taken care of. Instead of rolling the dice every year and seeing what medical condition I have this time. The last time it was life threatening blood clots I can't even imagine what would come next. I just... don't want to think about it. Going under the knife is a good idea...

Neostarwcc ... Respect to you! Taking charge of your life can be scary, but here you are being brave about it and getting the surgery! I truly believe that you will stick to it and enjoy your health! Hikes and long walks will become a thing that you can enjoy, and although there are so many wonderful digital distractions around us, nothing is quite as wonderful as a good walk and or hike.

My prayers are with you! I pray that you not only reach your goal, but hold fast to it and enjoy your new physical freedom! I also pray for your success and safety! I pray those things in Jesus' name, for you.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Neostarwcc ... Respect to you! Taking charge of your life can be scary, but here you are being brave about it and getting the surgery! I truly believe that you will stick to it and enjoy your health! Hikes and long walks will become a thing that you can enjoy, and although there are so many wonderful digital distractions around us, nothing is quite as wonderful as a good walk and or hike.

My prayers are with you! I pray that you not only reach your goal, but hold fast to it and enjoy your new physical freedom! I also pray for your success and safety! I pray those things in Jesus' name, for you.

To be completely honest with you I've been morbidly obese since I was a teenager so I really don't know or remember what its like to go for a long jog or to walk several miles. I remember walking for several miles when I was around 8 or 9 or so? It was quite a long walk. My friend and I started in the morning and we didn't get back home until nightfall. Also when I'm in the ER a few times a year for various different purposes I really would like to improve my quality of life. Last time it was because I had asthma but I went to the ER for shortness of breath on Easter Sunday and I wanted to make sure I wasn't having an allergic reaction to a new medication I was taking or worse, had blood clots again. But, luckily I didn't have any blood clots and it was just asthma that caused me to be short of breath. Thank God!

Anyway, thank you so much for your prayers! I look forward to going for a nice long walk again!

 

[bèlla]

Make sure you can afford the fills and see if they're covered by your insurance. Given your weight I'm surprised they recommended the band but it's less invasive in the long run and easy to reverse.

Look up weight loss surgery forums. There's a few and they're very informative. They'll cover pre-op, post-op, maintenance and plastic surgery. You're nearing the cap skin wise and must be prepared if it doesn't return to its former state completely. There may be excessive skin and most procedures aren't covered unless other problems exist.

Support is a must. You need to talk to people experiencing the same. You'll endure a lot of mental and emotional shifts and don't be surprised if you change. Weight can become a prison that hinders expression. Journaling is a good exercise for your mental health. Exercise is equally important. Get a step monitor. Fitbit has weight loss groups on their app that cheer you on.

Remember it's a journey. You didn't get there overnight and change takes time. You may want to talk to @Saucy. He shared his experiences in the singles forum.

The most important shift is your mindset. You have to recalibrate your thoughts on food and health. The surgery is tool that's wholly reliant on the other. You can gain it back so pray for temperance and discipline. The fitness and health forum has an accountability thread you may want to join.

Sometimes it helps to have an image in mind of the end goal that you put on the fridge or mirror that you'll see everyday as a mental reminder. We have a health thread in the singles area you may want to join.

The most successful people have reached a breaking point. It hurts too much to remain as is or you've had enough. You're no longer corroborating your behavior or excusing it and you're ready to change. I've shared tips in both places of dietary helps that will keep it off.

In the meantime make a bucket list of the things you'd like to do and try when your weight decreases. It's a wonderful motivator and gives you something to look forward to. If movement is difficult chair yoga is good. Once you're stronger you can try a treadmill and recumbent bike. Cycling burns a lot of calories and is good for weight loss.

Good luck and prayers for a safe procedure.

~bella

 

[Unqualified]

I know some people at church who had it. They right away started getting thinner at looking better. It takes a little time, maybe for the rest of your life. To keep it off. It still does require plenty of self control so you are not eating every two hours. One lady got down to a ‘normal’ size and stayed there a professional person. She’s been on it the longest. This other lady maybe 2-3 years is losing steadily. The other gentleman had a lot of physical problems and passed- not from that. But he was 70. They were brave and took the risk and felt better.

 

[BobRyan]

I've recently decided that enough is enough and decided to get weight loss surgery. At my latest weigh in a few weeks ago I weighed almost 440 pounds and I'm not that tall of a person. I am huge and I'm sick of needing a cane everywhere I go and not being able to walk very far and I've pretty much exhausted all other options at this point. The only thing I haven't tried are the weight loss injections but my insurance won't pay for them and they're over $1,000 a month so that's an option that I cannot use anymore. My insurance will however, cover weight loss surgery and I've decided on getting the Lap Band surgery. I've been to the consultation already and I know there is a chance that I not make it alive through the surgery but I am turning 38 in a month and I'm not an morbidly obese 24 year old anymore. I don't want to die when I'm in my 40's I'd like to make it at least until my mid 60's or maybe even 70s/80s if I can push it.

So that being said I am getting the surgery in a few months, normally I would post for prayers a few days or weeks before surgery (And I probably will make another topic closer to my surgery) but my surgery may get bumped up anyway and I was looking for support and prayers on this. Has anyone ever gotten weight loss surgery before and it been successful? I really don't want to go under the knife unless I 1. Have to and 2. Have God to guide me through this so that I can be a success. I've always told myself that my goal is 250-300 lbs but if I get weight loss surgery I can maybe get down to 180 pounds and get a majority of my health risks taken care of. Instead of rolling the dice every year and seeing what medical condition I have this time. The last time it was life threatening blood clots I can't even imagine what would come next. I just... don't want to think about it. Going under the knife is a good idea...

I understand your urgent need to get in good health. Will be praying for you.

You are trying to lose 280 pounds fast. I went from 240 to 180 but that is nothing compared to what you are dealing with.

I do know this - you can't gain weight or even maintain your weight if you just stick to a mix of green beans and corn, a bowl of cole slaw, some oatmeal and cream of wheat mix.. etc. No matter how often you eat or how much. And that goes for salad as well - all you can eat.

And never drink anything that is sweetened.

And of course - drink water like as often as you can in modest amounts.

 

[Dave Darling]

I've recently decided that enough is enough and decided to get weight loss surgery. At my latest weigh in a few weeks ago I weighed almost 440 pounds and I'm not that tall of a person. I am huge and I'm sick of needing a cane everywhere I go and not being able to walk very far and I've pretty much exhausted all other options at this point. The only thing I haven't tried are the weight loss injections but my insurance won't pay for them and they're over $1,000 a month so that's an option that I cannot use anymore. My insurance will however, cover weight loss surgery and I've decided on getting the Lap Band surgery. I've been to the consultation already and I know there is a chance that I not make it alive through the surgery but I am turning 38 in a month and I'm not an morbidly obese 24 year old anymore. I don't want to die when I'm in my 40's I'd like to make it at least until my mid 60's or maybe even 70s/80s if I can push it.

So that being said I am getting the surgery in a few months, normally I would post for prayers a few days or weeks before surgery (And I probably will make another topic closer to my surgery) but my surgery may get bumped up anyway and I was looking for support and prayers on this. Has anyone ever gotten weight loss surgery before and it been successful? I really don't want to go under the knife unless I 1. Have to and 2. Have God to guide me through this so that I can be a success. I've always told myself that my goal is 250-300 lbs but if I get weight loss surgery I can maybe get down to 180 pounds and get a majority of my health risks taken care of. Instead of rolling the dice every year and seeing what medical condition I have this time. The last time it was life threatening blood clots I can't even imagine what would come next. I just... don't want to think about it. Going under the knife is a good idea...

Praying now! Lord God I lift up Neostarwcc to You right now and I pray for Your intervention in their current situation and for successful weight loss surgery, I pray that the surgery would be a success and that You would help Neostarwcc to lose weight and drop to normal weight. I pray for the complete restoration of their health and also for wisdom for all doctors and surgeons, I pray for supernatural strength and encouragement for Neostarwcc and for provision of all needs according to Your riches and glory!

 

[Saucy]

I've recently decided that enough is enough and decided to get weight loss surgery. At my latest weigh in a few weeks ago I weighed almost 440 pounds and I'm not that tall of a person. I am huge and I'm sick of needing a cane everywhere I go and not being able to walk very far and I've pretty much exhausted all other options at this point. The only thing I haven't tried are the weight loss injections but my insurance won't pay for them and they're over $1,000 a month so that's an option that I cannot use anymore. My insurance will however, cover weight loss surgery and I've decided on getting the Lap Band surgery. I've been to the consultation already and I know there is a chance that I not make it alive through the surgery but I am turning 38 in a month and I'm not an morbidly obese 24 year old anymore. I don't want to die when I'm in my 40's I'd like to make it at least until my mid 60's or maybe even 70s/80s if I can push it.

So that being said I am getting the surgery in a few months, normally I would post for prayers a few days or weeks before surgery (And I probably will make another topic closer to my surgery) but my surgery may get bumped up anyway and I was looking for support and prayers on this. Has anyone ever gotten weight loss surgery before and it been successful? I really don't want to go under the knife unless I 1. Have to and 2. Have God to guide me through this so that I can be a success. I've always told myself that my goal is 250-300 lbs but if I get weight loss surgery I can maybe get down to 180 pounds and get a majority of my health risks taken care of. Instead of rolling the dice every year and seeing what medical condition I have this time. The last time it was life threatening blood clots I can't even imagine what would come next. I just... don't want to think about it. Going under the knife is a good idea...

Hi! Yes, I had gastric sleeve surgery and it was the best decision of my life. It's not easy, you will still likely be asked to lose some weight before the surgery, but there are a lot of hoops to jump through. Doctors are very thorough in making sure everything is safe. I have since lost over 200 pounds (since Oct 2022) and it's been great so far. If you have any questions, please feel free to PM me.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Make sure you can afford the fills and see if they're covered by your insurance. Given your weight I'm surprised they recommended the band but it's less invasive in the long run and easy to reverse.

Look up weight loss surgery forums. There's a few and they're very informative. They'll cover pre-op, post-op, maintenance and plastic surgery. You're nearing the cap skin wise and must be prepared if it doesn't return to its former state completely. There may be excessive skin and most procedures aren't covered unless other problems exist.

Support is a must. You need to talk to people experiencing the same. You'll endure a lot of mental and emotional shifts and don't be surprised if you change. Weight can become a prison that hinders expression. Journaling is a good exercise for your mental health. Exercise is equally important. Get a step monitor. Fitbit has weight loss groups on their app that cheer you on.

Remember it's a journey. You didn't get there overnight and change takes time. You may want to talk to @Saucy. He shared his experiences in the singles forum.

The most important shift is your mindset. You have to recalibrate your thoughts on food and health. The surgery is tool that's wholly reliant on the other. You can gain it back so pray for temperance and discipline. The fitness and health forum has an accountability thread you may want to join.

Sometimes it helps to have an image in mind of the end goal that you put on the fridge or mirror that you'll see everyday as a mental reminder. We have a health thread in the singles area you may want to join.

The most successful people have reached a breaking point. It hurts too much to remain as is or you've had enough. You're no longer corroborating your behavior or excusing it and you're ready to change. I've shared tips in both places of dietary helps that will keep it off.

In the meantime make a bucket list of the things you'd like to do and try when your weight decreases. It's a wonderful motivator and gives you something to look forward to. If movement is difficult chair yoga is good. Once you're stronger you can try a treadmill and recumbent bike. Cycling burns a lot of calories and is good for weight loss.

Good luck and prayers for a safe procedure.

~bella

Actually I was wrong it was a gastric bypass that I'm getting and not a lapband my wife confirmed it. You're correct that I'm too heavy for the band necause my bmi is about 65 and I would have to lose 30 or so pounds on my own to get it. So they decided that gastric bypass would be the right surgery for me. I will make sure to make sure I can afford everything I need. There was a $50 fee and I had to pay for a nutritionist but the surgery itself is going to be covered by my insurance. Luckily my wife is working now and can cover these costs so I'm not really worried about medical costs. Worst case scenario I could ask my mom for money she's helped us out oodles of times before when I was supporting my wife and I solely on ssi income.

I have my parents and my spouse and online friends for support. Also have a sister I could reach out to but we don't talk as frequently as the other people I mentioned. I know that I can gain the weight back because that happened to a coworker my wife works with. They got the surgery and gained it all back because they kept going to McDonald's.

I'm mainly concerned on diet because I'll be able to exercise a lot more after my surgery. I'm hoping that I can eat out at least some of the time because I do enjoy food. I'm really hoping my hunger cravings go away too or that I'll have the power and ability to resist them because right now the urge to eat is very strong. That's one reason why I can't lose 200+ pounds on my own. I've tried multiple times to lose weight and I've failed everytime.

So I'm hoping with the right support I can get down to 200 to 250 pounds. That's still overweight bmi but I'm trying to be realistic and my bone structure does support a 200 lb ish body. 200-250 lbs would be fantastic weight loss and get rid a majority of my medical problems.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Hi! Yes, I had gastric sleeve surgery and it was the best decision of my life. It's not easy, you will still likely be asked to lose some weight before the surgery, but there are a lot of hoops to jump through. Doctors are very thorough in making sure everything is safe. I have since lost over 200 pounds (since Oct 2022) and it's been great so far. If you have any questions, please feel free to PM me.

Thats fantastic! Congratulations on your weight loss i will PM you when i get a chance.

 

[bèlla]

I'm mainly concerned on diet because I'll be able to exercise a lot more after my surgery. I'm hoping that I can eat out at least some of the time because I do enjoy food. I'm really hoping my hunger cravings go away too or that I'll have the power and ability to resist them because right now the urge to eat is very strong.

There's nothing wrong with enjoying food but it shouldn't be your God. The realities of what you've done and what it requires for correction should jar you. The impact of your actions on others should stop you in your tracks. You aren't the only one affected. Look at your wife. Doesn't she deserve a spouse who's healthy and supportive? You're putting more on her plate every morsel you eat. She's the one who has to pick up the slack when you can't.

You haven't reached the point of contrition. When you have you aren't thinking of take out. You're facing the music. You look in the mirror unclothed and see what you've done. You watch others do the things you can't because your body prevents it and see the gravity of your mistake.

You should love yourself more than that plate. When you grasp what you've done to your temple and it truly disgusts you and you demand change. Not want it. When you accept nothing less than its correction the cravings will cease and the portions will be appropriate.

Gluttony is self-destructive and the remedy is self-control. You can't be supported by someone who enabled you. They didn't have the courage to tell you to stop or put their foot down and force the issue. I had a friend in a similar situation who married a girl who was obese. He was smaller and more active but when he moved to be with her the weight piled on. They ate out a lot and both balllooned.

One day she shared a health problem and she was diabetic and the things he was wrestling with. I listened but I was upset. We were close but she didn't know me the way he did. I let her talk a few days until I was ready to address it and didn't hold back.

She got some much needed tough love that day and I told I wouldn't cosign their destruction. I'm not going to watch you kill yourself. At the rate you're going that's the end result. I said if you want to die let me know. If you want to live I'll help you. But it ends today. She broke down because she understood the ultimatum and knew I wasn't bluffing. She decided to live and they're healthier now.

I'm not an enabler nor do I coddle. But I know to get a person from point a to point b and tell them what it takes. I talk to myself the same way. If you take my words to heart you'll have a healthy bmi. I've given you the keys. My friends were your size but they're not anymore and they didn't have surgery.

~bella

 

[Michie]

I've recently decided that enough is enough and decided to get weight loss surgery. At my latest weigh in a few weeks ago I weighed almost 440 pounds and I'm not that tall of a person. I am huge and I'm sick of needing a cane everywhere I go and not being able to walk very far and I've pretty much exhausted all other options at this point. The only thing I haven't tried are the weight loss injections but my insurance won't pay for them and they're over $1,000 a month so that's an option that I cannot use anymore. My insurance will however, cover weight loss surgery and I've decided on getting the Lap Band surgery. I've been to the consultation already and I know there is a chance that I not make it alive through the surgery but I am turning 38 in a month and I'm not an morbidly obese 24 year old anymore. I don't want to die when I'm in my 40's I'd like to make it at least until my mid 60's or maybe even 70s/80s if I can push it.

So that being said I am getting the surgery in a few months, normally I would post for prayers a few days or weeks before surgery (And I probably will make another topic closer to my surgery) but my surgery may get bumped up anyway and I was looking for support and prayers on this. Has anyone ever gotten weight loss surgery before and it been successful? I really don't want to go under the knife unless I 1. Have to and 2. Have God to guide me through this so that I can be a success. I've always told myself that my goal is 250-300 lbs but if I get weight loss surgery I can maybe get down to 180 pounds and get a majority of my health risks taken care of. Instead of rolling the dice every year and seeing what medical condition I have this time. The last time it was life threatening blood clots I can't even imagine what would come next. I just... don't want to think about it. Going under the knife is a good idea...

Did your surgeon give you a certain amount of weight to lose before you get your surgery?

 

[Neostarwcc]

Did your surgeon give you a certain amount of weight to lose before you get your surgery?

No although I might drop like 20 pounds or so because right now I'm on an antipsychotic that is causing me to gain weight. I gained about 20 pounds since starting the medicine and he might decide to stop my new medication and put me on something else. I'm going to mention to him that I'm getting surgery and I'll see what he thinks would be good for me. I see my psychiatrist about that tomorrow afternoon.

 

[Neostarwcc]

There's nothing wrong with enjoying food but it shouldn't be your God. The realities of what you've done and what it requires for correction should jar you. The impact of your actions on others should stop you in your tracks. You aren't the only one affected. Look at your wife. Doesn't she deserve a spouse who's healthy and supportive? You're putting more on her plate every morsel you eat. She's the one who has to pick up the slack when you can't.

You haven't reached the point of contrition. When you have you aren't thinking of take out. You're facing the music. You look in the mirror unclothed and see what you've done. You watch others do the things you can't because your body prevents it and see the gravity of your mistake.

You should love yourself more than that plate. When you grasp what you've done to your temple and it truly disgusts you and you demand change. Not want it. When you accept nothing less than its correction the cravings will cease and the portions will be appropriate.

Gluttony is self-destructive and the remedy is self-control. You can't be supported by someone who enabled you. They didn't have the courage to tell you to stop or put their foot down and force the issue. I had a friend in a similar situation who married a girl who was obese. He was smaller and more active but when he moved to be with her the weight piled on. They ate out a lot and both balllooned.

One day she shared a health problem and she was diabetic and the things he was wrestling with. I listened but I was upset. We were close but she didn't know me the way he did. I let her talk a few days until I was ready to address it and didn't hold back.

She got some much needed tough love that day and I told I wouldn't cosign their destruction. I'm not going to watch you kill yourself. At the rate you're going that's the end result. I said if you want to die let me know. If you want to live I'll help you. But it ends today. She broke down because she understood the ultimatum and knew I wasn't bluffing. She decided to live and they're healthier now.

I'm not an enabler nor do I coddle. But I know to get a person from point a to point b and tell them what it takes. I talk to myself the same way. If you take my words to heart you'll have a healthy bmi. I've given you the keys. My friends were your size but they're not anymore and they didn't have surgery.

~bella

You're right. I did weigh 300 pounds (I've been over 200 lbs since middle school) when I met my wife 10 years ago and I had lost 50 pounds by starving myself (not proud of that) prior to her meeting me. When we met I expected to put the weight back on because she obviously forced me to start eating again but she also gave me everything I asked for. I'm really hoping that surgery will get rid of the cravings though because they are unbearable. It doesn't matter how mentally prepared I am to lose weight the cravings are always my downfall. It's no different than being addicted to smoking or drugs or anything else that kills you and honestly I understand where people are struggling.


I'm not saying that this won't be a struggle though. I know it will be. But I really hope the cravings won't come back and that I'll get used to eating less food. A week prior to surgery I can only have liquids and for 2-4 weeks after surgery so the cravings probably won't be bad. When i can eat solid foods again I probably likely will feel full after eating 1,000 calories for example. But my addiction goes beyond feeling full and it feels like surgery is the only option. That or I'll always be the weight I am and die in my 60s. We will see what God has planned though because I know that all of my success or failure will come from him. You know?

 

[Michie]

No although I might drop like 20 pounds or so because right now I'm on an antipsychotic that is causing me to gain weight. I gained about 20 pounds since starting the medicine and he might decide to stop my new medication and put me on something else. I'm going to mention to him that I'm getting surgery and I'll see what he thinks would be good for me. I see my psychiatrist about that tomorrow afternoon.

It’s usually a good idea to try to lose weight before surgery. If nothing else, it helps you get into a new mindset.

 

[Michie]

You're right. I did weigh 300 pounds (I've been over 200 lbs since middle school) when I met my wife 10 years ago and I had lost 50 pounds by starving myself (not proud of that) prior to her meeting me. When we met I expected to put the weight back on because she obviously forced me to start eating again but she also gave me everything I asked for. I'm really hoping that surgery will get rid of the cravings though because they are unbearable. It doesn't matter how mentally prepared I am to lose weight the cravings are always my downfall. It's no different than being addicted to smoking or drugs or anything else that kills you and honestly I understand where people are struggling.


I'm not saying that this won't be a struggle though. I know it will be. But I really hope the cravings won't come back and that I'll get used to eating less food. A week prior to surgery I can only have liquids and for 2-4 weeks after surgery so the cravings probably won't be bad. When i can eat solid foods again I probably likely will feel full after eating 1,000 calories for example. But my addiction goes beyond feeling full and it feels like surgery is the only option. That or I'll always be the weight I am and die in my 60s. We will see what God has planned though because I know that all of my success or failure will come from him. You know?

From what I understand, you’ll have cravings. You just do not eat as much food. Although that can change over time. I know a lot of people are referred to weight loss therapists to help them through their journey.

 

[bèlla]

You're right. I did weigh 300 pounds (I've been over 200 lbs since middle school) when I met my wife 10 years ago and I had lost 50 pounds by starving myself (not proud of that) prior to her meeting me.

That isn't ideal and I'm glad it didn't continue. All disordered eating is the same. There's no difference between anorexics, bulimics or the morbidly obese. Only the methods differ. No one wants to be rejected and I understand why you did it but you're not in that place. You're a son of the King and must see yourself as He does. He wants to see you healthy, healed and whole and it isn't impossible. Hold on to those words during your journey.

When we met I expected to put the weight back on because she obviously forced me to start eating again but she also gave me everything I asked for.

That isn't uncommon. Unfortunately, most are unprepared to deal with the realities of circumstances like yours. When the body has been in that state for lengthy periods different methods are required. Some assume you can push away from the table when you may have never developed that ability. It requires a different approach.

Those in a similar position who haven't married should select a companion with that in mind. Someone who will keep you accountable and work with you to turn things around. Love makes people squishy and if that isn't their position coming in the likelihood of compromise is great.

That wasn't for you but others in your shoes.

I'm really hoping that surgery will get rid of the cravings though because they are unbearable. It doesn't matter how mentally prepared I am to lose weight the cravings are always my downfall. It's no different than being addicted to smoking or drugs or anything else that kills you and honestly I understand where people are struggling.

The surgery may not kill the cravings completely. Pick up Mindless Eating. I read it years ago and it revolutionized my mindset on food and I think it will bless you. Try to read something every month along those lines. The Case for Sugar should follow. If you give up refined sugar (white) and soda you'll see a huge difference.

The more you dig into mindset the less trapped you'll feel. You have to tell yourself no and reinforce it. And the way you beat cravings is by playing offense against your desires. Don't stock up pn the things that make you pig out. Force yourself to pick up a bag of chips or make some cookies instead. You'd be surprised what the effort does to your cravings.

Ice cream was our nemesis. When I stopped buying it and said we'd only have it when I make it the desire fled. And we have a double quart machine! But the idea is fatiguing and that's enough to discourage me. We have it a couple of times per year now. I did that with all of our faves. There's nothing in the cupboard to gorge on and that's intentional.

But my addiction goes beyond feeling full and it feels like surgery is the only option. That or I'll always be the weight I am and die in my 60s. We will see what God has planned though because I know that all of my success or failure will come from him. You know?

That's why it's important to connect with others going through the same and on the other side. Most people don't know what it's like to be in your shoes and it's important you have kindred spirits who allow you to speak candidly and encourage you in high and low moments. Weight loss surgery is life altering and you'll have mental and emotional changes too.

Stack things in your favor and remain prayerful throughout. The Lord has given you an opportunity to turn things around. Keep believing you can.

~bella

 

[Will Joseph]

I pray you survive the surgery

 

[Neostarwcc]

I pray you survive the surgery

Thanks for the concern. They mentioned that there is a 1% mortality rate with the surgery it apparently used to be 10% but if I do nothing about my weight in probably won't make it past 65-70. I am almost 38 years old now so it's time.

 

[Neostarwcc]

That isn't ideal and I'm glad it didn't continue. All disordered eating is the same. There's no difference between anorexics, bulimics or the morbidly obese. Only the methods differ. No one wants to be rejected and I understand why you did it but you're not in that place. You're a son of the King and must see yourself as He does. He wants to see you healthy, healed and whole and it isn't impossible. Hold on to those words during your journey.



That isn't uncommon. Unfortunately, most are unprepared to deal with the realities of circumstances like yours. When the body has been in that state for lengthy periods different methods are required. Some assume you can push away from the table when you may have never developed that ability. It requires a different approach.

Those in a similar position who haven't married should select a companion with that in mind. Someone who will keep you accountable and work with you to turn things around. Love makes people squishy and if that isn't their position coming in the likelihood of compromise is great.

That wasn't for you but others in your shoes.



The surgery may not kill the cravings completely. Pick up Mindless Eating. I read it years ago and it revolutionized my mindset on food and I think it will bless you. Try to read something every month along those lines. The Case for Sugar should follow. If you give up refined sugar (white) and soda you'll see a huge difference.

The more you dig into mindset the less trapped you'll feel. You have to tell yourself no and reinforce it. And the way you beat cravings is by playing offense against your desires. Don't stock up pn the things that make you pig out. Force yourself to pick up a bag of chips or make some cookies instead. You'd be surprised what the effort does to your cravings.

Ice cream was our nemesis. When I stopped buying it and said we'd only have it when I make it the desire fled. And we have a double quart machine! But the idea is fatiguing and that's enough to discourage me. We have it a couple of times per year now. I did that with all of our faves. There's nothing in the cupboard to gorge on and that's intentional.



That's why it's important to connect with others going through the same and on the other side. Most people don't know what it's like to be in your shoes and it's important you have kindred spirits who allow you to speak candidly and encourage you in high and low moments. Weight loss surgery is life altering and you'll have mental and emotional changes too.

Stack things in your favor and remain prayerful throughout. The Lord has given you an opportunity to turn things around. Keep believing you can.

~bella

Oh yes I realize that starving myself wasn't a great way to lose weight but I was a complete fool back then. I was even at the point where i didn't want to take my antipsychotics or blood pressure pills either and I learned the hard way a few years after i met my wife that I had to take them. I had a really bad manic/psychotic episode that lasted about 2 months I had to be hospitalized for a week and it wasn't a fun time. So I take them now and haven't had a major episode since. I've had several episodes but not super bad ones.

I'm glad you mentioned that most of the cravings should go away. If most of it goes away I probably could stop but people with addictions for 30+ years (yes I've been over eating since about second grade) can't do it on their own without help either from God, a doctor, a spouse or anybody really. I've realized that.