Natural Family Planning

[barefoot04]

I've always considered natural family planning letting God decide when and how many children we should have. But I've been doing it for 5 years and it no longer seems letting him decide. It seems like I'm in more control. More control even over birth control pills, condoms, ect.

Even having children would be planned because I know when I'm fertile and it's not llike I would never not know. It is the knowledge of how it works that seems to take away God's will.

I am thinking that I am wrong in some area of all this. So anybody who has a better understanding please help.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

if God wants you to have another child, you will get pregnant. With my second daughter we were doing NFP and dd 5-6 days before my fertile time, and did not dd again until 3-4 days after the temp shift. She is now 2 years old. BTW we were going to start trying for her the following month. God is in control of all things, even though we think that we are.

 

[Sabertooth]

Your new thinking is correct. Medically unnecessary NFP IS at odds with Quiverfull, as is any deliberate, medically unnecessary contraception (whether it is successful or not). Apart from abortifacient contraception, you have no obligation before God to abandon [contraception], but if you believe that each successful conception in marriage is the expressed will of God, it doesn't make sense to actively oppose it.

 

[KathyO]

I've been using NFP this month purely because I haven't become pregnant since miscarrying last April. Hubby and I discussed it and he said we need to maybe have it looked into by a doctor to make sure there's not a problem left over from the miscarriage. I figured that a doctor would have me go and chart for a few months anyway, so might as well do that myself first.

Even though we're using it to get pregnant and hubby always says that God is in charge no matter what I know or don't know, it has made me feel like I'm stepping on the Lord's territory, that I should leave it all up to him. I know what you mean by having that knowledge. Once you have it, it's hard to ignore!

For me, as I'm not getting any younger (42) I don't want to leave it for the next couple of years just to find out there was a problem that could easily be fixed. Is that wrong, or should I just leave everything up to Him? We're new at being QF, hence the confusion!

Is trying to get pregnant against God? To me, He has commanded us to be fruitful and multiply. Doesn't that imply "doing" something, as in trying to aim for your fertile days, rather than sitting back and waiting for God to do all the work? By charting (using NFP) I can see my fertile days, or at least when I think I am fertile. Maybe I shouldn't be doing this at all?

If I'm wrong or missing something, please let me know.

 

[Sabertooth]

...

For me, as I'm not getting any younger (42) I don't want to leave it for the next couple of years just to find out there was a problem that could easily be fixed. Is that wrong, or should I just leave everything up to Him...?

There is no detailed Scripture on the subject, but my take is that if you are unable to get pregnant AND you're okay with that, you are not obligated to seek medical help. Many medical procedures assume a certain amount of risk, having potentially bad side effects. That being said, you still want to have your condition checked to see if it is not symptom of a bigger health problem. In men, erectile dysfunction can be a symptom of high blood pressure. Not knowing enough about medicine, it's plausible that other reproductive problems may be tied to more general health issues.

Is trying to get pregnant against God? To me, He has commanded us to be fruitful and multiply. Doesn't that imply "doing" something, as in trying to aim for your fertile days, rather than sitting back and waiting for God to do all the work? By charting (using NFP) I can see my fertile days, or at least when I think I am fertile. Maybe I shouldn't be doing this at all...?

Knowing when your fertile does not force God's hand. If you have fertility issues, it may help with that part of the equation when your body is functioning as it would if you didn't have fertility issues. IOW, you are just increasing your body's availability to God. If that solves your physical problem, your likelihood of getting pregnant is the same as any other couple's.

As to wanting children, that's wonderful as long as it doesn't go into some form of child idolatry. And you will need to be willing to accept when God says, "No, not this time."

 

[KathyO]

Thanks Sabertooth, your answers help a lot.

 

[Franklin777]

These methods can help a couple avoid pregnancy if the couple receives training from a specialized instructor and if they carefully follow all of the instructions provided. (Ask your doctor how to find an instructor who is specially trained in teaching natural family planning.) Both methods can be 90% to 98% effective (2 to 10 pregnancies per 100 couples) when they are practiced correctly. However, if a couple doesn't follow the instructions completely, these methods will be much less effective. In practice, these methods may not be as reliable as other forms of birth control.

 

[Sabertooth]

I believe the point of this thread is about using NFP for TTC.

There are two major subgroups in QF:

1. Those couples who place their married sex lives on God's altar and receive His answer of when & how many, and

2. Those who are more aggressive about pursuing children.

Group 2 will try to optimize opportunities for pregnancy and attend their reproductive health better, but they will still hit an upper limit when God says no. God may even be calling them to be more aggressive and address medical issues to facilitate that process. In that regard, medical tools are helpful if there is no downside and it doesn't violate one's conscience. Assistive NFP is one such tool.

Group 1 is a bit more passive. They may even miss pregnancies, due to undiagnosed reproductive issues that would prove to be unintentionally contraceptive. But this group tends to view the aggressiveness of group 2 as striving, apart from God's specific call (which we must allow for).

NFP as unnecessary contraception is not consistent with either group.