Also, you may have a baby that's more vocal or doesn't need much sleep; therefore, you get little rest. My son was like that, and I had the same thoughts. My second son was quiet. He slept well, ate well, and rarely cried at all. It seems everyone who has two, gets one of each. Just seems to always happen that way.
Are you having any specific things that you are unsure about? Anything in particular that is troubling you? We veteran moms (I'll be a grandmother tomorrow) can help a lot since we've been there, done that, and have the spit up on the T-shirts to prove it.
Actually, I think that is probably part of my problem. It seems like everything about my pregnancy and early days of having my daughter went completely opposite of what I thought it would be like.
First, I am a negative RH... my husband is positive RH... so I had to get a RH shot during and after my pregnancy. My pregnancy was very uncomfortable for the most part (I had a lot of hip problems and a lot of swelling) ...and gained 70 lbs (still needing to lose 30 lbs to get back to pre-pregnancy weight).
Second, my doctor believed she was head down the whole time... when my water broke and I went to the hospital a quick ultrasound was done to show the she was actually breech (bum-down). So I ended up needing a c-section... which wasn't really that bad... they did a great job, and I am healed well now... but it was not at all what I expected.
Third, we had a very, very difficult time breastfeeding. She would not latch, or if she did, she was never on properly and I ended up with blisters and bleeding. I ended up quitting after 3 weeks as I was crying every time I tried to nurse... and I did not feel like we were bonding at all.
As soon as I started bottle feeding, I started to feel much better and started feeling like we were finally bonding. Unfortunately, she started getting colic right after, and we had to try a few different types of formula before finally finding one that didn't upset her stomach so much.
So, the fourth thing that had made this pregnancy/baby difficult is that she doesn't really like to be held much. I know she loves me though. She smiled and laughs and plays with me when I put her on a play mat or bouncer... she just doesn't like to cuddle. She seems very independent, which is a good trait to have - she will probably be a great leader. She also seems very intelligent - always looks like she is taking everything in and loves to listen/watch while I read books to her.
I love my daughter very much, and I would not change a thing about her. I am just having a hard time because almost nothing is as I thought it would be. I think I am probably afraid to have another and it being worse than what happened the first time... because even though nothing was as I thought it would be, she is still a wonderful baby, and the c-section actually went really well and healed quickly.
I also feel like I have some selfish reasons for not wanting another baby... one being if I get to a good weight again, I don't to have to go though gaining and trying to lose weight again. Also, I feel like I want some time back... to write music again... or even just to bake and take nice long baths. I'm thinking probably a lot of mothers feel that way though, hehehehe... and I know someday I will be able to do all of those things again... I just am feeling impatient sometimes
It's weird too, sometimes I think technically my husband and I were not supposed to have children... my being a negative RH and him being positive. Without modern medicine, our daughter would probably not be alive (being also breech). I've thanked God many times though for the miracles of modern medicine in letting us have a baby... but sometimes it seems like we went against what would have been.
LOL... I think I've rambled long enough!!! But I guess this is why I am so confused... and some outside opinions may help me to look at things in different ways
And maybe if I were to have another baby everything would be better, just like what happened to you singpeace!
