- Dec 13, 2015
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- Calvinist
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- Married
I told my Elder the other day that I felt like giving up. Giving up on holiness, on my Christian walk, and on winning the race. I can't help it, I just can't. I can't help but feel like I'm not living the life that Jesus wants me to live. Of course, from a Calvinist position this is completely incompatible with the Bible that teaches us that God leads us throughout iur lives. However it FEELS like I'm not doing what God wants me to be doing. Our Pastor recommended a book to us that he's going to give to us when we get to church on Sunday morning that I'm looking forward to read but I just feel like, everything is so distant right now.
We haven't been able to attend Church ever since my wife got her job, I haven't been praying as often as I probably should, I don't love God as much as I should because if I did I'd never sin against him ever again, and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.
Don't get me wrong, I do have a rock hard faith that has whethered every storm and it will weather this one as well proving, that God keeps those who are meant to be saved, saved. My issue isn't salvation it's living the Christian life as I should be. It's that I desire and want to live a Godly life and I don't want to live my life the way I want, I want to live my life the way God wants. And honestly, this is a good thing so idk why I'm depressed and why I'm feeling this way. Can anybody give me any advice regarding this? Because, I haven't grown as a Christian in quite some time. In fact, I'm slowly going away from Christianity and I definitely don't want that.
We haven't been able to attend Church ever since my wife got her job, I haven't been praying as often as I probably should, I don't love God as much as I should because if I did I'd never sin against him ever again, and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.
Don't get me wrong, I do have a rock hard faith that has whethered every storm and it will weather this one as well proving, that God keeps those who are meant to be saved, saved. My issue isn't salvation it's living the Christian life as I should be. It's that I desire and want to live a Godly life and I don't want to live my life the way I want, I want to live my life the way God wants. And honestly, this is a good thing so idk why I'm depressed and why I'm feeling this way. Can anybody give me any advice regarding this? Because, I haven't grown as a Christian in quite some time. In fact, I'm slowly going away from Christianity and I definitely don't want that.