I am so sad, I miss my folks sooo much.

[Susie~Q]

Well, another Christmas, I am still missing my dear parents as much, if not more, as the day they died. I can not stop crying, I am making myself sick I was watching our favorite Christmas show yesterday, a musical with Mel Torme, Doc Severinson, etc, the music is lovely, I remember my dear mother saying to always think of her when I heard that one song, "Christmas is for children", well, I did, and the tears would not stop, I am crying as I type this. They WERE Christmas, now, I have no one I really feel close to, I know I am ruining my husband's Christmas, but, I can not help it, I do not want to feel this way.

I feel so alone and hopeless, I so wish that those times I was not too nice to them could be erased, I can not get those times out of my mind lately. I wish the Lord would comfort me. I know, you all are going to say that "Jesus cares" etc, well, I know that, but it does not help at all.

I am so lonesome, they were my best friend, my best cheerleader. They were there to help with good, solid advice, I did not appreciate them as I should I guess.

I am also missing my dear friend Jim, he is in heaven as well. Another dear friend who cared and who was Christmas itself. My husband tries so hard, but, I just can not get over these deaths. I want my momma, daddy and friend.

I am so worried, as well, that daddy is not in heaven, I had thought he was saved, he said he was, but after my mom died, he got bitter and said he was an atheist and proud of it, that God, etc was a fairy tale. I DO NOT WANT HIM IN HELL Please God, NO!!!!!!!!!

Well, I better stop, I am getting sick to my tummy. Please keep me in your prayers.

 

[Criada]

I'm sorry sweetie, only just saw this.
I hope you got through Christms and things are a bit easier now
It's so hard missing those who were such a huge part of our lives -especially at special I es of year.
Remember sweetie, God loves your dad even more than you do, and he understands the grief and despair that made him feel that way.

 

[Susie~Q]

Thank you for caring. It was a very rough Christmas, I am soooo glad it is over. for some reason, it seems to get worse every year, I can only pray that next year will be better.

Hugs
Susie

 

[KnowHisJoy77]

I am very sorry for your struggles. I pray that you find a support group "Grief Share" in your area to find healthy ways to process and deal with your many losses.
God bless you and keep you.
Please meditate in Philippians 4:8

 

[Susie~Q]

Sadly, there are no such groups near me at all. My best therapy is coming here, it helps more than most things do.

 

[ananda]

 

[ChristianNewbie123]

you've told me about your dad. It seems he acted like one, which is a great indicator.

Once a Christian, always a Christian.

Once saved always saved?

 

[Johnnz]

You can leave your dad's destiny with God. We just don't know what can happen after death.

We can't fill in the gaps loved people leave. But we must learn to live with them. It's OK to feel pain when we remember. But we must also live in the reality of:
a) We still live and are to continue to live our lives faithfully before God;
b) The good that they did and were lives on in eternity. It was precious to God and does not get erased. For a believer with Jesus now, they have entered their rest. They would not want to return. For your dad accept God's future will include your total reconciliation of his death.

John
NZ

 

[SteveNZ]

..............I know I am ruining my husband's Christmas, but, I can not help it, I do not want to feel this way.

................ My husband tries so hard, but, I just can not get over these deaths. I want my momma, daddy and friend.

...of course you are not ruining his Christmas .......
You are LOVED and cared for heaps and heaps my angel.....
I'm here to help you through and cry away with you.....
We will get there, Jesus is with us.

 

[DansonPete]

It's really hard missing our loved ones. We just have to deal with it day by day.