Hi Everyone,
I don’t know where to begin this post…but I guess I will start with the most recent. My wife and I have dated for 6 years, were married last October, and she now wants a divorce.
We both moved from Florida to South Carolina and lived separately for 2 years - this was the first time we lived on our own! Then she had managed to buy a home in which we lived together a year prior to marriage. I know this was wrong, and we both knew - unfortunately, there was no financially suitable way we could have lived apart. Because of this, the church we were attending refused to marry us.
Fast forward to now, the only reason I am getting for this divorce is because I “do not do ENOUGH around the house” and she does not feel “validated in her emotions with me.” I have been a complete wreck for the past month since this started as she has completely separated from me, sleeps in the other room, and has sneaked around with friends. Her behavior has been very unusual the past few months as well.
I need to add that the past 4 months have been very stressful as I have crippling anxiety. I was going through medication changes and this caused me to go through withdrawals, crying, panic attacks - it was horrific. The entire time, my wife was very unsupportive and even would blame my medical issue on why she’s not happy.
I don’t want to go into all of the details. But, I did make one mistake in all of this. I reached out to her friends/coworkers to see if there was anything “going on” or “cheating” that they knew of. This immediately spread like wildfire as she’s in EMS…
I went to her parents for advice the first weekend after she said she would like a divorce and they completely cut me down personally, physically, spiritually, and even ragged on my job and family. I then reached out to a friend we had met when first moving up here - he is in the church body and is always “looked up to.” I called him for advice and he told me that when he first met me he thought I was a “narcissist, controlling, and prideful.” He wouldn’t even let me talk and even said “stop blowing smoke up my (expletive)” and, “stop defending yourself, you (expletive) up”. I was in shock. I’m still in shock. Everyone who knows me personally can not believe what is happening…
I’ve been praying and praying for comfort and guidance as this may force me to go back to Florida. I have people who tell me it sounds like she’s cheating. I have others who say it sounds like she’s “snapped” (which some in her family are bipolar and controlling). I’m so hurt, lost, confused, angry…I have a Christian counselor I have been working with who is amazing. But has anyone gone through this? And what does God say about the WIFE ending a marriage? I have tried everything in my power to get her back, but she is already gone. She has started buying workout stuff, new clothes…it’s scaring me so much because it is all so sudden and not the woman I married before God.