Why Your Catholic Men’s Group Will Eventually Fold

[Michie]

Many of the men who are in most need of Catholic male fellowship are in the worst position to make it happen: mid-career, young and growing family, demands on time to balance everything...anything that isn’t work or family gets pushed to the back burner.

When my wife and I first got married, we didn’t have many friends who were practicing Catholics. I had to fish for a college friend to be the godfather of our firstborn, and I attended a Protestant Bible study for six years because I couldn’t find a Catholic one. We felt alone as we slowly turned the boat toward the shores of Catholic orthodoxy.

So, I prayed. I prayed the prayer of St. Francis: “Lord, send me some brothers.” And, eventually, one by one, He did. A priest in our area was organizing a winter hike in single-digit temperatures and I got plugged in with some good, solid Catholic guys. I was very grateful for these guys; it seemed like the community, the band of brothers, I had been looking for.

I want to be clear about something here: none of what I’m about to write is reflective of these guys in particular. From other male Catholic friends I’ve talked to in other areas of the country, I’ve heard that they seem to deal with the same issues and challenges that I do here in my area. So, I think the issue is one of the idea of a Catholic men’s group in general, not a particular group specifically.

Continued below.

Why Your Catholic Men’s Group Will Eventually Fold

Many of the men who are in most need of Catholic male fellowship are in the worst position to make it happen…anything that isn’t work or family gets pushed to the back burner.

www.crisismagazine.com

 

[JimR-OCDS]

I attended a Catholic Bible Study in my parish years ago. The level of spiritual growth
was elementary among the members, and two men, including the leader, had problems
sharing their faith with their wives. Their wives and themselves were not on the same level
spiritually. Another man I knew, was as surprised as I was that these guys had no fellowship
with their wives. Their wives, although devote, didn't seem to want the ideology their
husbands were pushing, which including conservative politics as well as religion.

As the saying goes, a husband and wife who pray together stay together, but grow spiritually
together as well.

 

[Bob Crowley]

There's an Australian Group called "Men Alive" with a link below.

menALIVE Australia

menALIVE is a National Catholic Ministry to Men which was founded out of a response to a great need in the hearts and lives of men, and a great need in the life of the Catholic Church.

www.menalive.org.au

I attended one of their conferences a few years ago and I probably had unrealistic expectations but they do a good job. It's a national group, not parish or diocesan or even at state level.

I'm attending a "Summit" in a week or so and one of the speakers will be Dr. Robert Falzon, who founded "Men Alive" in 2007. Unfortunately I won't be attending his session (there are four "blocks" of topics with each "block" having five available sessions, and we can only attend one), but no doubt it will be interesting. I suppose I could attend his session if I change my mind, but I'll wait and see. I've already booked to hear another speaker.

There's a link to a video of Dr. Robert Falzon here.

Women socialise easily while men tend to need a project or activity to focus on. In addition the "mens groups" I've seen in Protestant churches tend to be older men, happy to go to a coffee shop and have a general discussion or meal together.

As an example on Thursday afternoons I usually join in with a Masters social field hockey outfit (I was there this afternoon as it happens). Most of us also play fixtures on Tuesday night, but this is social (although we still want to "win"!). The point I'm making is that we've all got a common interest or activity which is hockey. Without that common interest the whole thing would just evaporate.

I usually shoot off home after it's over, but quite a few of the blokes socialise afterwards. However it is the common interest in their sport that really binds them together.

As an aside my old Protestant pastor said to me once when we were discussing the business of female pastors (or priests) "It's hard enough to get men into church now...". You can read your own interpretation into his comment, but I know what I think.

Getting men into the church is a problem.