The Lolcat Bible

[shinbits]

This site has every verse of every chapter in the entire bible, in the "lolcat" translation:
http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Main_Page

In case u don't know what a lolcat is, they are kittens that are supposed to talk like small toddlers do:

Genesis 1:1:

"Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem."

Genesis 2:15:

So Ceiling Cat put teh boi in teh gardn to be itz farmr.16 An Ceiling Cat sed to teh boi, "See all theez froot treez? Knok yurself owt.17 But dont eet teh froot of the tree of morulz, cuz if u eatz that then ULL DIE! Srsly! Kthxbye."

 

[shinbits]

The Virgin Birth (Matthew 1:18-25)

18 Now, teh burth of teh Nointed Cat was liek dis: After Mary and Joseph wuz all "We get maerdied, kthnx", but befor dey haz hankiez pankiez Mary was a muthur cat thanx 2 HovurCat.19 Joseph was liek "I haz virjn - NOOOO dey be stealin my virjn! Must hied hur".20 But when he was tihnkin, zomg, a BirdCat frm Ceiling Cat was liek, "Oh hai! Iz in ur dreemz, givin u messij. Don be scairdy cat. Taek Mary as ur wife - is virjn. But teh Forse is strong in tihs wun, lol! HovrCat is on hur, givn hur kitlin, srsly." So Joseph was liek " Oh yey. Iz gonna luv him and squeez him and call him George."21 But BirdCat was liek "No, you gonna call him Happy Cat. cuz he save kittehs frum bein bad kittehs. Kthxbai."22 So all dis was all did cuz Ceiling Cat had sed it wud be. Him proffit was all liek:23 "Hay guise, luk! teh virjn is all preggers, and dey gonna call him A-manual", dat be joospeek for "Ceiling Cat wiv us"24 Then Joseph walked up, dun wat teh BirdCat frm Ceiling Cat tolded him too, and was all liek "U wit me now lol" at Mary.25 And dey didnt has Hankiez Pankiez affer dey gets a son and call him Happy Cat. Kthnx.

 

[shinbits]

John 3:16:

So liek teh Ceiling Kitteh lieks teh ppl lots and he sez 'Oh hai I givez u me only kitteh and ifs u beleeves him u wont evr diez no moar, kthxbai!

 

[Hentenza]

Thread moved from Physical & Life sciences to CP&E.

 

[pgp_protector]

I wonder how long this thread will last this time, last time the LOL cat bible came up, it got ugly real fast.

 

[Supernaut]

I think it is very humorous.

 

[Vatis]

Nice.
I can't wait to read a lolcat version of "on the origin of species".
BTW those guys need a hobby.

 

[pgp_protector]

They sell it at Amazon now ?

 

[Cabal]

I wonder how long this thread will last this time, last time the LOL cat bible came up, it got ugly real fast.

hey

hey

the bibul are serious bizness

k?

 

[Octorock]

It's pretty silly and harmless.

 

[Celticflower]

I agree it is silly and harmless - and we all need to laugh once in a while.

 

[revanneosl]

I love this thing!

When I originally found it, I wrote the first version of The Ceiling Cat Creed (it's listed under "Ceiling Cat Prayer") I just found out somebody came in a tweaked the kittyoque, to make it appropriate for both Eastern and Western Lolcatians!

But srsly. I had intended to continue with Lolcat Liturgy, but actual life kept on happening.

Hmmmmmm... Lolcat Eucharistic Prayer:

O hai!
O hai!
Tink 'bout ceilin' cat nao.
hokay
Les say thanks!
datz kewl

 

[DamianWarS]

Blessinz of teh Ceiling Cat be apwn yu, srsly. This is the lolcat Bible Translation Project, a project dedicated to translating the entire Bible into lolspeak. The Project started in July of 2007 and so far we have most of the Bible translated...

seems like a paraphrase rather than a translation... I would guess its even paraphrasing an English version like the NIV or KJV like the Living Bible instead of the greek and hebrew as the The Message does.

It is a little funny but I'm not really into the Lord's name in vain references like "OΜG Ceiling Cat givez me a boi!!!!" I had to even use a different unicode character for the letter 'M' to even show that reference without it being censored here.

It also has some odd theology I suppose my concern would be people being exposed to this who are not believers and it may help shape there idea of the bible, Christianity and God as a whole with a negative slant, basically they would take the bible as seriously as they take this "translation".

 

[KIYX]

Anybody who takes it seriously really has much larger issues than a negative slant.

 

[Octorock]

seems like a paraphrase rather than a translation... I would guess its even paraphrasing an English version like the NIV or KJV like the Living Bible instead of the greek and hebrew as the The Message does.

It is a little funny but I'm not really into the Lord's name in vain references like "OΜG Ceiling Cat givez me a boi!!!!" I had to even use a different unicode character for the letter 'M' to even show that reference without it being censored here.

It also has some odd theology I suppose my concern would be people being exposed to this who are not believers and it may help shape there idea of the bible, Christianity and God as a whole with a negative slant, basically they would take the bible as seriously as they take this "translation".

I can't even fathom the idea that anyone could possibly take this as an accurate representation of the Bible.

 

[laconicstudent]

I can't even fathom the idea that anyone could possibly take this as an accurate representation of the Bible.

Really? I can. I've seen all sorts of crazy statements made, over time, on this forum. I've seen someone claim the Roman gods exist, because we named the planets after them.

 

[DamianWarS]

Anybody who takes it seriously really has much larger issues than a negative slant.

I can't even fathom the idea that anyone could possibly take this as an accurate representation of the Bible.

exactly my point. This is not taken seriously but yet we do take the bible seriously so how does an unbeliever know how to make that distinction? Something like this could add to the idea that the real bible is just a bunch of made up children stories and as someone laughs at the verses here they also may laugh at actual verse and write them off as something not to be taken seriously. The negative slant is that the real bible is not taken seriously.

 

[Cabal]

Parody doesn't necessarily imply that what is being parodied is a joke itself.

 

[rockaction]

Lolcats are a stupid copy of Caturday. Though I'm not a 4chan guy, I respect their originality. Lolcats are a ripoff.

 

[danielseeksGod]

this is all pretty blasphemous