Telling a "mentally disabled" autistic teenager about Jesus

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

I have a non-verbal, autistic nephew who is literally diagnosed as mentally retarded. He is 15 years old and very sweet. He lives in a very non-christian household. My brother's mom, however is Christian and takes my nieces to church sometimes. The youngest believes in Jesus despite her anti-christian dad (praise God.) I am going to be a personal support worker for my autistic nephew this summer. He does understand language and will follow commands (if he's not being stubborn) but it's hard to tell how much he understands. I don't know how abstract of a thought he can understand. Like death for example. There's really no way to tell if he could understand the concept of death. Nevertheless, since I don't know just how much he understands, and I'll be taking him out away from his dad, I think it would be a good idea to try and tell him about Jesus. I don't really know if he'll even pay attention or not, especially if he's not understanding what I'm saying, but I think it certainly couldn't hurt to try. I'm just wondering how to go about it. Should I just sit him down and tell him the gospel? Should I get a children's Bible and read it to him? Should I put a Christian radio station on in the car when I'm driving with him? Should I just chat to him casually about what God is doing in my life? I don't want to scare him. I don't want to be like, you're going to die someday and end up in either heaven or hell. If he does understand death in some way, I don't know where his mentality is at. I guess I'll get more information about what age is brain is at before I start working with him. I know we teach young children about Jesus, but probably glaze over the death part until they are old enough to accept it. I don't know. Any opinions on how to approach this? I think just because he is "mentally challenged" and autistic doesn't mean he shouldn't learn about Jesus.

MariaJLM · Mar 13, 2019

I'll just say that I'm uncomfortable with your usage of the r word here to describe autism. I know many people with autism. They are not "retarded".

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

I am not describing autism as retarded. I know that not everyone who is autistic is retarded. I am saying it because he literally is the medical definition of retarded, as well as autistic. So what word would you rather I use?

MariaJLM · Mar 13, 2019

Fintastic said:
I am not describing autism as retarded. I know that not everyone who is autistic is retarded. I am saying it because he literally is the medical definition of retarded, as well as autistic. So what word would you rather I use?

Mentally handicapped perhaps? "Retarded" is an outdated and nasty term that not even the medical community uses anymore.

Jonathan Walkerin · Mar 13, 2019

Trust in God and pray healing for him ?

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

MariaJLM said:
Mentally handicapped perhaps? "Retarded" is an outdated and nasty term that not even the medical community uses anymore.

I wouldn't go so far as to say nasty. It's just a medical term that means slowed development. I did not use it in the slang way meaning stupid. I use it respectfully as his actual diagnosis.

Silverback · Mar 13, 2019

MariaJLM said:
Mentally handicapped perhaps? "Retarded" is an outdated and nasty term that not even the medical community uses anymore.

The PC Word is developmentally disabled, I have a brother who has an IQ of around 62/63 (Forrest Gump was at IQ70). I normally hate PC conversation, but the "R" is very demeaning, and it bothered me when people would use it when referencing to my brother.

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

It's just a word and I had no evil intent behind it. His own family uses it when describing his condition. Anyway, I can't seem to change the post title, I'm sorry. I guess I'll go ask for advice elsewhere while you guys whine about my usage of a medical term.

MariaJLM · Mar 13, 2019

Silverback said:
The PC Word is developmentally disabled, I have a brother who has an IQ of around 62/63 (Forrest Gump was at IQ70). I normally hate PC conversation, but the "R" is very demeaning, and it bothered me when people would use it when referencing to my brother.

Oh, I'm not PC at all really myself, but in this particular case I'm bothered. The r word is very demeaning.

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

There, I figured out how to change the title. PC modern day crybabies. Thanks for the help.

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

MariaJLM said:
Oh, I'm not PC at all really myself, but in this particular case I'm bothered. The r word is very demeaning.

It's only demeaning if I used it with that intent. I find this attack on me to be demeaning. It's just like if you're talking about a donkey "ass" is not being used inappropriately and if you're talking about a female dog "[bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]" is not being used inappropriately.

Silverback · Mar 13, 2019

Fintastic said:
There, I figured out how to change the title. PC modern day crybabies. Thanks for the help.

Would you like to be called that name? Asked to leave a restaurant because someone is bothered by the way you look, parents telling there kids to "take the long way around" so they don't have to walk near him, parents telling there kids to laugh at them...I lived it with my younger brother, kids punching him in the face, washing his hair with sand, and the list goes on, but always in the end he was just a retard right.

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

Silverback said:
Would you like to be called that name? Asked to leave a restaurant because someone is bothered by the way you look, parents telling there kids to "take the long way around" so they don't have to walk near him, parents telling there kids to laugh at them...I lived it with my younger brother, kids punching him in the face, washing his hair with sand, and the list goes on, but always in the end he was just a retard right.

No, that's horrible. And I'm very sorry you and him went through that. But the way people acted has nothing to do with the medical term of his diagnosis. And I'm not sure why I would be called that? Because I'm not that? I don't mind being called depressed, or hypothyroid, or as having social anxiety. I don't mind it being said that I have a mental disorder. Because it's all true.

MariaJLM · Mar 13, 2019

Fintastic said:
It's only demeaning if I used it with that intent. I find this attack on me to be demeaning. It's just like if you're talking about a donkey "ass" is not being used inappropriately and if you're talking about a female dog "[bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]" is not being used inappropriately.

No, it's demeaning regardless which is why the medical community stopped using it. Language changes over time. For example, f*g was once a bundle of sticks or a cigarette rather than a slur for homosexuals.

Fintastic · Mar 13, 2019

Ok, no one give me advice, because you're all hung up on some stupid word and I'm a nasty jerk because I used a medical term in an appropriate situation. "Christian" forums. Yeah right. Wolves in sheep's clothing forums!

Justasurvivor · Mar 13, 2019

Fintastic said:
I have a non-verbal, autistic nephew who is literally diagnosed as mentally retarded. He is 15 years old and very sweet. He lives in a very non-christian household. My brother's mom, however is Christian and takes my nieces to church sometimes. The youngest believes in Jesus despite her anti-christian dad (praise God.) I am going to be a personal support worker for my autistic nephew this summer. He does understand language and will follow commands (if he's not being stubborn) but it's hard to tell how much he understands. I don't know how abstract of a thought he can understand. Like death for example. There's really no way to tell if he could understand the concept of death. Nevertheless, since I don't know just how much he understands, and I'll be taking him out away from his dad, I think it would be a good idea to try and tell him about Jesus. I don't really know if he'll even pay attention or not, especially if he's not understanding what I'm saying, but I think it certainly couldn't hurt to try. I'm just wondering how to go about it. Should I just sit him down and tell him the gospel? Should I get a children's Bible and read it to him? Should I put a Christian radio station on in the car when I'm driving with him? Should I just chat to him casually about what God is doing in my life? I don't want to scare him. I don't want to be like, you're going to die someday and end up in either heaven or hell. If he does understand death in some way, I don't know where his mentality is at. I guess I'll get more information about what age is brain is at before I start working with him. I know we teach young children about Jesus, but probably glaze over the death part until they are old enough to accept it. I don't know. Any opinions on how to approach this? I think just because he is "mentally challenged" and autistic doesn't mean he shouldn't learn about Jesus.

it doesn't hurt to try and besides if he knows about Jesus and he has a innocent heart along with that knowledge I think it will be a awesome idea

wish you luck

Mark Quayle · Mar 13, 2019

Silverback said:
Would you like to be called that name? Asked to leave a restaurant because someone is bothered by the way you look, parents telling there kids to "take the long way around" so they don't have to walk near him, parents telling there kids to laugh at them...I lived it with my younger brother, kids punching him in the face, washing his hair with sand, and the list goes on, but always in the end he was just a retard right.

Haha go to a less moderated Christian debate forum and you will eventually be call exactly that. Hope your skin is less thin.

Fin, it seems to me you don't know your nephew very well; it seems to me you would not be asking for advice from total strangers if you did.

I would get to know him as well as possible first, before deciding on a course of action. Meanwhile, just be representative of Christ around him. If you think that means Christian radio, fine. If that means caring for those who need it, do so. If you think that means extraordinary kindness without gaps full of meanness, be that.

I think we will all be surprised how much people like him learn, and who it is we assumed would not be in Heaven when we get there.

Jonaitis · Mar 13, 2019

It is kind of hard to answer your question since we don't know where he is on the spectrum and on what level of functionality he is at. One woman I've met appears as "normal" to public opinion, but she has difficulty processing sensory information such as noise in a room. So, it is a little difficult if we don't know enough about him and where he is at. Similar to what Mark said, you should get closer to him and you will learn along the way how to share the gospel with him.

RaymondG · Mar 13, 2019

Fintastic said:
I have a non-verbal, autistic nephew who is literally diagnosed as mentally retarded. He is 15 years old and very sweet. He lives in a very non-christian household. My brother's mom, however is Christian and takes my nieces to church sometimes. The youngest believes in Jesus despite her anti-christian dad (praise God.) I am going to be a personal support worker for my autistic nephew this summer. He does understand language and will follow commands (if he's not being stubborn) but it's hard to tell how much he understands. I don't know how abstract of a thought he can understand. Like death for example. There's really no way to tell if he could understand the concept of death. Nevertheless, since I don't know just how much he understands, and I'll be taking him out away from his dad, I think it would be a good idea to try and tell him about Jesus. I don't really know if he'll even pay attention or not, especially if he's not understanding what I'm saying, but I think it certainly couldn't hurt to try. I'm just wondering how to go about it. Should I just sit him down and tell him the gospel? Should I get a children's Bible and read it to him? Should I put a Christian radio station on in the car when I'm driving with him? Should I just chat to him casually about what God is doing in my life? I don't want to scare him. I don't want to be like, you're going to die someday and end up in either heaven or hell. If he does understand death in some way, I don't know where his mentality is at. I guess I'll get more information about what age is brain is at before I start working with him. I know we teach young children about Jesus, but probably glaze over the death part until they are old enough to accept it. I don't know. Any opinions on how to approach this? I think just because he is "mentally challenged" and autistic doesn't mean he shouldn't learn about Jesus.

I believe people in the state of your nephew are much closer to God than those who can internalize the education of the world.... The birds never heard the gospel, yet they are able to follow the spirit and know when the weather will change and when to fly north/south. The fish in the sea never heard the gospel, yet they are able to follow the stream to mating waters miles away. The lilies of the field dont attend church, but they know how to produce seed and grow towards the light...

I believe if you would sit and study your nephew.....He will be able to teach you more about the Gospel than you could ever teach him....

God saves · Mar 13, 2019

Well, I am unqualified to give advice, but I don't think it would hurt to tell him about the love of our Lord Jesus Christ, because in my opinion EVERYONE on this earth should have the chance to hear of the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ - even those who seem to have severely limited mental capacity or verbal comprehension ability.

I think that it is important that he hears the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ in a way that he may be more likely to understand it; for example a profoundly deaf person who cannot lipread may understand the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ better through gestures or sign language than through purely spoken language; in a similar way if someone had limited verbal comprehension ability I think it is possible things like visuals might enhance their understanding. However, especially as he seems to understand some spoken language, personally I don't think it would hurt to attempt to share the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ verbally with him. Personally, I would not necessarily make strong assumptions about what someone does and does not understand, and even if someone does not understand spoken language I don't believe it means they are incapable of understanding and perceiving things like what someone is trying to tell them and emotions.

Besides sharing the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ with him, I think that actions are important as well, to model our Lord Jesus Christ's love and to give him a godly example. I believe one of the most important things for all children and teenagers, even those who seem to have more severe disabilities, is to train them up in the way of the Lord.

I found these websites:
4 Ways to Share the Gospel with Kids Who Have Special Needs
Sharing Jesus With My Autistic Son
6 Ways to Share Jesus with a Child Who Has Autism
Sharing Jesus with My Autistic Son
Encouraging Bible Verses for Special Needs Moms
Five Things I’ve Learned from Kids with Autism
What Autism Parents Wish Christians Knew About Autism | Intersect
5 Christian books for parents of a child with Autism
Help for Autistic Children

Telling a "mentally disabled" autistic teenager about Jesus

Member

Crazy Cat Lady

Member

Crazy Cat Lady

Well-Known Member

Member

Well-Known Member

Member

Crazy Cat Lady

Member

Member

Well-Known Member

Member

Crazy Cat Lady

Member

Active Member

Monergist; and by reputation, Reformed Calvinist

Soli Deo Gloria

Well-Known Member

Active Member

Similar threads