*sigh* I regret divorcing my husband

[Life2Christ]

I divorced my husband way too fast. We've been divorced for 4 years and I feel like I can't reconcile these feelings of regret. I can't move on. My ex-husband feels like family to me. I care about him deeply. I pray for him. He doesn't feel the same way towards me. But yet I wait. Does love wait? I'm waiting for a man who doesn't love me. This is the worse case of "he's just not that into you." *sigh*

Since our divorce I have not been with or dated any other man.

 

[OhioMom65]

Have the two of you actually discussed your feelings vs. his feelings (or are you just thinking he doensn't care about you, when maybe he's not aware of your feelings)? Would he be open to discussing it, or, perhaps, going to talk to a counselor with you?

 

[Life2Christ]

Have the two of you actually discussed your feelings vs. his feelings (or are you just thinking he doensn't care about you, when maybe he's not aware of your feelings)? Would he be open to discussing it, or, perhaps, going to talk to a counselor with you?

We discussed it last July (I"ll never forget) but he told me he was starting a new relationship with a woman. They're not together anymore. After that I just dropped it. I just have a longing in my heart, I would never tell him again.

 

[OhioMom65]

We discussed it last July (I"ll never forget) but he told me he was starting a new relationship with a woman. They're not together anymore. After that I just dropped it. I just have a longing in my heart, I would never tell him again.

(above,b&u by me)

That sentence, right there just makes my heart ache for you.
Have you prayed about reconcilling with him? And if so, does it feel "right?" That's a sign of where it's coming from....your heart, or God's (my opinion,only). But I've heard and read that God's will will never send feelings of confusion or discontent through you, only peace and a feeling of "this is right."

I understand the human side of not wanting to put yourself out there to get your feelings hurt again...I have been there, I've done that, I still do it, and will probably do it a few thousand more times during my life time. But if your marriage is as important to you as it sounds/seems to be from your post, do it again.

You never know...maybe HE is feeling right now like..."Oh, man...I really messsed up....I had my chance with Life2Christ to reconcile, but I chose the other person, and now she'll never even consider me again..." Maybe he's just as afraid to tell you how he feels.

I hope, wish and pray only the very best for you! Is it possible for love to wait? Of course! Especially if it's God's will. With God, all things are possible.

Blessings to you!
OhioMom

 

[Avniel]

Why did you leave him?

 

[Life2Christ]

Why did you leave him?

After the birth of our child, he moved out of state with his former high school "sweetheart". He told me the marriage was over because he loved her. That relationship didn't last (lasted 2 years). I felt like I should have waited for him to come to his senses. I reacted quickly out of revenge.

 

[Life2Christ]

(

You never know...maybe HE is feeling right now like..."Oh, man...I really messsed up....I had my chance with Life2Christ to reconcile, but I chose the other person, and now she'll never even consider me again..." Maybe he's just as afraid to tell you how he feels.

If he feels this way then he has no interest in coming after me. I guess I made my feelings known. He has yet to do that. I don't want to coerce him in anyway. I deserved to be loved, not as second best.

 

[OhioMom65]

If he feels this way then he has no interest in coming after me. I guess I made my feelings known. He has yet to do that. I don't want to coerce him in anyway. I deserved to be loved, not as second best.

I assumed you didn't want to tell him how you feel again because you are afraid of being hurt, or being rejected again. I was saying, perhaps he feels the same way as you (if that is, indeed how you feel). I guess I was wrong about why you don't want to tell him how you feel.

Relationships never thrive when we hide things from our spouse -- like our feelings. It's only fair to everyone involved that you all know where you stand with each other. That's how I'd want to be treated, anyway.

 

[Life2Christ]

Relationships never thrive when we hide things from our spouse -- like our feelings. It's only fair to everyone involved that you all know where you stand with each other. That's how I'd want to be treated, anyway.

That's very true and wise. Maybe I'm holding back. He is not a Christian so, technically, he's not the right man for me and maybe out of my life for a reason. But still, I'm frozen. The only man in my life right now is Jesus so maybe that is why my husband doesn't know how I feel. My ex-husband is not a good candidate for me.