My ex-boyfriend is/was a pimp

[Forealzchola]

I am no longer with my ex-bf we have been broken up for almost two years now either way I was still trying to be his friend as of recent...he attempted to propose to me earlier this year ( in the midst of our friendship) and during the course of this time period..I found out he was prostituting women( 3 that he told me of)! for the second time in the four years of me knowing him.

The first time happened when I was actually dating him, however at the time I didnt know it...he said he was just being extra nice to girls in order to get rides and money for lunch because his car was broke down etc and i was like hmm alright as long as these girls dont get the wrong idea and after awhile i put my foot down because i told him that was emotional cheating. I found out the truth the first time close to when i broke up with him he said was just trying to prostitute them for money so he didnt really cheat on me and not to be mad....the relationship came to a dead closure shortly after

Either way almost two years later he went away to college..i left him while he was there because i never heard from him but found out he was into prostituting some college girls out there...and he said he "turned them out" I still dont know what all this lingo means mind you but this was during the time he proposed...but he said he thought it would be good for him to be honest with me so that i could possibly accept what he was doing...because he wanted to be honest ....so stupid smh..of course i said no...

My bf at the time called the cops on him to report him but by that time they found nothing...he had already "goten out the game" til this day Ive tried to be this persons friend...

but it urks me and sickens me that he could do something like this..to me he is the biggest predator on the face of the earth and i darn near almost hate him...and i dont trust him around no one...i wont even bring him with me to church because i think of all the young ladies there he could take advantage of...


Some nights i stay up thinking what type of vilian would do this to someone...he is a law enforcement major and intentionally sought out "disadvantaged girls" It angers me so much....

I do not want to be his friend anymore even 9 months supposedly of him having stopped this lifestyle...but ill never trust him if he truly stopped or if it will start again since this was the 2nd time it came up.

It hurts me because i know he was doing this when i dated him years ago and that he was doing it now...I dont want to associate with a predator...

he says i need to forgive him and to let it go because he doesnt do it now but he always says that...

am i wrong to feel this way?

 

[rowantree]

Hi Forealzchola. No, you are not wrong to feel that way. Whatever you feel is what you feel, but it seems to me that you are very clearsighted about it all. You are not wrong to want no association with a predator. I think you need to steer clear of him, which is what you are doing.

I also can see why you would not want to take him to church with you, for fear that he would do something to the girls there. You are very responsible in thinking about that. If he wants to go to church, then in my opinion he can go himself. Make his own decision about it and stick with it if it is what he wants.

Not sure that this helps in any way, but I wanted to respond to you, because I do not feel your thoughts and feeligns are in any way wrong.

 

[Forealzchola]

I know all is possible with God but what percentage of men leave this lifestyle behind? I was Just so shocked that he would do this because his own mother was a sex worker. He is actually from the conception of one of her customers.

 

[debutaunte]

Your boyfriend said it best when he suggested you forgive your ex-boyfriend and let go.

Maybe you should consider that your obsessing about someone who has moved on with his life and he probably loves the undeserved attention you've been giving him even as of the writing of your last post about him.

He obviously does not want to change or he would have done it by now. Either way your present boyfriend deserves your time and attention more than an ex-boyfriend.

If your ex-boyfriend is going to be Saved it will be God Almighty that will do so. All we can do is pray for the best for those we care about. Or just move on with our lives and take care of our own lives and loved ones.

Just my humble opinions. I apologize if I've intruded. God Bless you sister.

I am no longer with my ex-bf we have been broken up for almost two years now either way I was still trying to be his friend as of recent...he attempted to propose to me earlier this year ( in the midst of our friendship) and during the course of this time period..I found out he was prostituting women( 3 that he told me of)! for the second time in the four years of me knowing him.

The first time happened when I was actually dating him, however at the time I didnt know it...he said he was just being extra nice to girls in order to get rides and money for lunch because his car was broke down etc and i was like hmm alright as long as these girls dont get the wrong idea and after awhile i put my foot down because i told him that was emotional cheating. I found out the truth the first time close to when i broke up with him he said was just trying to prostitute them for money so he didnt really cheat on me and not to be mad....the relationship came to a dead closure shortly after

Either way almost two years later he went away to college..i left him while he was there because i never heard from him but found out he was into prostituting some college girls out there...and he said he "turned them out" I still dont know what all this lingo means mind you but this was during the time he proposed...but he said he thought it would be good for him to be honest with me so that i could possibly accept what he was doing...because he wanted to be honest ....so stupid smh..of course i said no...

My bf at the time called the cops on him to report him but by that time they found nothing...he had already "goten out the game" til this day Ive tried to be this persons friend...

but it urks me and sickens me that he could do something like this..to me he is the biggest predator on the face of the earth and i darn near almost hate him...and i dont trust him around no one...i wont even bring him with me to church because i think of all the young ladies there he could take advantage of...


Some nights i stay up thinking what type of vilian would do this to someone...he is a law enforcement major and intentionally sought out "disadvantaged girls" It angers me so much....

I do not want to be his friend anymore even 9 months supposedly of him having stopped this lifestyle...but ill never trust him if he truly stopped or if it will start again since this was the 2nd time it came up.

It hurts me because i know he was doing this when i dated him years ago and that he was doing it now...I dont want to associate with a predator...

he says i need to forgive him and to let it go because he doesnt do it now but he always says that...

am i wrong to feel this way?

 

[Timahani]

I read your story, and I know how hard it is loving someone who is involved in such a lifestyle. I want to commend you first and foremost for stopping the relationship and being the strong young lady that you are today. I don’t know your situation, but I have family members that are extremely close to me who are in this sort of industry pimping, drug dealing ect………besides there negative attitudes every once in a while I didn’t know that I wouldn’t think that for one second they would hurt me…that was until I was brutely raped and beaten……they both of my cousins have tried …to use me for money…these are individuals who are extremely manipulative and whos charm is very high (that is why they are able to seduce so many girls)………I even had one of my cousins girlfriends try to set me up to get money..which is very dangerous. All I can say to you is don’t feel that you are more safe, or that HE CONSIDERS you BETTER than these girls (of coarse you are), but in his mind…it is all about him and his satisfaction without any regards to others as a human being. I commend you more than you can image, but I also stress to stay away …..far far away….God is doing a work in your life ….He is calling you to a greater level…..its too dangerous being involved with such ungodliness….I know probably in your head , that you are like…he would never hurt me….thats what I said as well…………Sometimes we must as young lady use wisdom….lots of love.

 

[Wolfdog]

HelloForealzchola, you were right to get away from this guy. I worked with street drinkers for some years and they are manipulative predators. Predators can change like, 'quick silver,' depending on who they are with and what they want from them. Many of these guys are experts at playing, 'mind games,' to keep their targets confused and they play fast and loose with truth, in order to keep you off balance. 'he says I need to forgive him and to let it go because he doesnt do it now but he always says that' That is classic manipulative speak, effectively teling you what you have to do to get his approval. It is up to you what you do, but if you forgive him, he will have gained an advantage over you and bent you to his will.

 

[Vanilla Scripture]

He's an ex for a reason obviously. That he's not doing this now, at least so he says, doesn't mean anything. That he is the kind of man that would pimp women tells you the kind of man he is with regard to his respect for women.

I've found that men who tend to pimp women for income will also act the pimp with women in all facets of relationship.
Be wise. If you can not trust him to be your boyfriend how can you trust him to be your friend? And you are known by the company you keep.

Look out for yourself.

 

[Blessedj01]

You can forgive him but that doesn't mean you should associate with him. To do so (IMO) would put you in danger and be worrying for your BF.

If he can pimp women who knows what else he is capable of and what criminal circles he secretly runs in.