Manifestations of God,spiritual gifts, and "weird" stuff

[anewman1993]

I'm going to preface with this : I am baptist (GASP), or at least, for the most part I am. However, I unlike many baptist I believe god still moves the way he does in the bible. I belive in spiritual gifts like speaking in tounges, healing, prophecy (both that its a direct word from god and that it involves god giving insight about the future), ect.

Also, I would like to add, when I say "weird" I don't mean that in a bad or negative way, but simply in a "its not the norm in human society" way. Because lets face it, most miracles are not the norm.

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Ok, so. Even though I believe in these things, Ive never seen them (except healing, as a kid, though it left an impression as it was absolute and involved immediate family). I WANT to see these things, I mean, I desire to see god manifest in my life. Not because I need some evidence of him, I have that, and am quite assured that he is real, loves me, and that I am saved. Rather, I want to see these things, so I can be closer to him. Its something I think we shy away from, in baptist circles, we love to acknowledge the holy spirit, but undercut him as a person. We love to talk about him guiding us by some "feeling" or intuition, and he does, but I don't think thats the primary way. We look in scripture and see that when he talks about the holy spirit, its very much talked about as a person, who guides us, who we can ask questions, without us sitting there wondering about it. Ive only really had one instance like that, it was a few months ago, when god called me to the ministry (I'm in college so its not like I'm headed to seminary for a few years or anything). It was like BAM instance, undeniable, truth from god. Honestly I wish he would talk to me more that way. I couldn't ignore it, the spirit would not SHUT UP about me going into ministry, every second of every day it was a constant poking in my mind about how I need to go into the ministry. It didn't relent until I accepted and talked with pastors I knew. However that voice has quieted, and I don't want him quite, I want him speaking to me, teaching me, guiding me, I mean, I'm the LAST person who should go into ministry, but god wants me to so there I go. However thats not what this post is about.

I want to know god better, in a real way. Not some knowledge OF god, but to actually KNOW him, to speak with him. I won't lie, I have some medical issues, and modern medicine has literally said "I don't know, so I guess your going to live in agony the rest of your life". So healing would be REALLY nice, but if he does not will it then I will accept that. What I want, to his power in my life, not so I can go out and feel amazing and better because I'm close to god, but because I just want to be close to god, even if no other soul on the planet knows of what he as done in my life. My parents have mentioned to me they have spoken in tongues, and at one point cast out a demon, however its something they won't talk about outside the confides of our home, and actually won't talk about at all other than to say "its real, Ive seen it". However, Ive never seen it. So, my own experience is lacking. I don't feel the "joy" of being with god, when I DO feel his presence all I want to do is cry, cry, and cry some more.

I guess what I'm asking, is obviously what I'm doing isn't getting me closer to god, so what do I do? I spend time in prayer and worship, I spend time reading, I speak to him through my entire day and try to acknowledge his presence as much as possible. I have sin in my life, but I'm taking steps to remove it, its painful, but I'm doing it because I love god more. So, what am I doing wrong? I mean, I don't know what else I can do, and ultimatly I know there is nothing I can do to force god to be with me, but the word is pretty clear, if we seek him, he will make himself known, so how do I seek him other than what ive been doing, this has been going on for ever a year, what am I doing wrong.

Thats not to say Ive not seen any progress, I have, I mean, he called me to ministry in a way that I can't describe other than I simply knew he wanted it. A moment of perfect clarity. I want to be with god, I desire to be around him, the scripture talks about how we can bodly go into his throne room, well, HOW how do I go there? I mean, its in heaven, I'm on earth, and I lack the abilty to jump up into heaven and walk through the doors, and Ive ask him to bring me, and he hasn't. So, what am I doing wrong? What attitude do I have that is wrong, why does he not answer a prayer as simple as 'Please talk to me" or "please just be with me, let me know your here"

 

[tturt]

My husband was raised Baptist (not knocking them either) and he fits your first paragraph, too.

You're right that we hear His voice (John 10:27). So we have to learn to fine tune our hearing. Might want to read this article by Teresa Seputis http://www.charismamag.com/spirit/sp...talk-like-that

 

[anewman1993]

My husband was raised Baptist (not knocking them either) and he fits your first paragraph, too.

You're right that we hear His voice (John 10:27). So we have to learn to fine tune our hearing. Might want to read this article by Teresa Seputis http://www.charismamag.com/spirit/sp...talk-like-that

I get an error going to that link

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

UNlearning is the biggest obstacle for most people. and then also simultaneously learning EXPERIENTIALLY Yhvh's Presence and unshaking perfect shepherding/guidance apart from or in spite of all that the enemy and men attempt (to thwart His Purpose).

to be led by PEACE of Yahushua in the heart, and at the same time NOT be influenced nor distracted by feelings.... not at all.....

 

[anewman1993]

UNlearning is the biggest obstacle for most people. and then also simultaneously learning EXPERIENTIALLY Yhvh's Presence and unshaking perfect shepherding/guidance apart from or in spite of all that the enemy and men attempt (to thwart His Purpose).

to be led by PEACE of Yahushua in the heart, and at the same time NOT be influenced nor distracted by feelings.... not at all.....

soooo. You want to explain in some way I can apply to my life?

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

soooo. You want to explain in some way I can apply to my life?

yes.

have to find a way to be in contact, yhvh willing in yahushua hamashiach(God willing in Jesus the Messiah).

 

[Bob Carabbio]

So, what am I doing wrong?

Probably NOTHING (although the enemy would like to convince you that you are).

The process of "Maturing in the faith" is a life-long process, and sometimes the progress APPEARS TO BE painfully slow. It's no accident that everybody knows Rom 8:28, but Nobody knows Romans 8:29-30 (which explains v28). I've been in the way for over 50 years, and I'm NOT what I was 50 years ago.

Keep doing what you're doing, and If GOd wants you to do something else - he'll let you KNOW in terms you can understand.

It's the enemy's voice that tries to convince you that you're getting nowhere. ANY voice that rips, tears, humiliates, accuses, or degrades you is SATAN'S VOICE - not God's. He doesn't speak to his kids that way.

Tell Satan to take his garbage, and stick it where the sun don't shine. out loud if you feel like it - SHOUT at him (probably not in public) God says that if you "Resist him" he'll flee.

 

[anewman1993]

yes.

have to find a way to be in contact, yhvh willing in yahushua hamashiach(God willing in Jesus the Messiah).

Umm. ok, once again... how?

Probably NOTHING (although the enemy would like to convince you that you are).

The process of "Maturing in the faith" is a life-long process, and sometimes the progress APPEARS TO BE painfully slow. It's no accident that everybody knows Rom 8:28, but Nobody knows Romans 8:29-30 (which explains v28). I've been in the way for over 50 years, and I'm NOT what I was 50 years ago.

Keep doing what you're doing, and If GOd wants you to do something else - he'll let you KNOW in terms you can understand.

It's the enemy's voice that tries to convince you that you're getting nowhere. ANY voice that rips, tears, humiliates, accuses, or degrades you is SATAN'S VOICE - not God's. He doesn't speak to his kids that way.

Tell Satan to take his garbage, and stick it where the sun don't shine. out loud if you feel like it - SHOUT at him (probably not in public) God says that if you "Resist him" he'll flee.

I'm not sure I agree with that, the bible says god disciplines his children, which means chastisement, which most of the time isn't exactly fun, however its always to the betterment to help us grow closer to Christ, and we will still feel loved. Also I don't belive god will "let you KNOW in terms you can understand."I mean, the bible is pretty full of examples, if we harden our heart, we won't hear him, if we choose things other than him, we won't hear him. I loved what one person said. God always speaks, just quieter than the most important thing in our life, so we have to strip away the unimportant to be with him. I don't belive the christian life is one of just sitting there doing nothing and 'waiting" for god, its very much a life of DOING things, not to earn salvation, but because we love god. The bible says "seek and you will find", well that implies DOING something. Seeking, Maybe I'm just seeking wrong? Or maybe I need to fast (amazing experince last time 2 times I did it, though I think thats probably more to do with the fact I set a timer and every hour and 15 minutes I would read my bible and pray, then after I was done I would set the timer again, many times starting to get in his word and pray again before the timer went off and studying his word between prayer sessions, however, its hard to set that type of day up in the busy life we all live)

 

[yeshuaslavejeff]

the description of the life of a believer in Scripture is so different than the description of the lives of people all around us, whoever we have studied and watch and see daily.

except where Jesus dwells. "God with us". that makes all the difference, life and death.

 

[Bob Carabbio]

I don't belive the christian life is one of just sitting there doing nothing and 'waiting" for god, its very much a life of DOING things, not to earn salvation, but because we love god. The bible says "seek and you will find", well that implies DOING something.

No problem there - Abide in the calling in which you were called 1 Cor 7:20.

Do what you KNOW to do, and keep on keeping on.

It's too bad you don't believe that God communicates to His kids. Hopefully you'll find out the truth about that.

YES you will be disciplined - but it's important to know the NATURE of the discipline, and IGNORE the attacks of the enemy.

 

[PRMan99]

The Bible says to "Eagerly desire the greater gifts." It sounds like you are doing that. Just keep asking God for them and they will come.

As far as what to do, God has told you what to do. He wants you to be in ministry. Start down that path. When God needs to tell you something else, he'll get your attention then.

God bless you, brother.