Lord I believe now help my disbelief... and panic

[tre_corvus]

I dont know where to put this, i have all 4 of thr diagnosis on the top of the mental health section here on Christian forums. My problem is also spiritual. Its been stuck in my head and I dont know what to do. My faith in the one true God is not a problem, I can see His work, his nature, I can see his spirit alive in people and I feel him. My faith in the death and resurrection I dont deny God's power over all creation.

I dunno how it started but I started having doubts about Jesus, was he who he said, did he do what he did, do I really believe in Jesus. I realize I have a hard time saying it out loud. "I believe in Jesus" because I doubt myself, i question if I really do because sometimes I dont or cant wrap my head around it. This has happened before, when i get panic attacks and bad anxiety I question everything including my own reality. It gets really distressing because I want to reach out for comfort but feel like I cant or shouldnt or wont be heard because in that moment I'm rejecting Him. I dont want to... I'm not against him, I'm just not sure of anything. i just need to know God still has me, that even if I dont have much faith or even any I still have His grace and this feeling and loop im stuck in will pass, that he'll help me get better. That my faith will get stronger with this struggle not worse.

 

[Romans 8]

I would suggest reading daily through the gospels, as well as reading historical books on the life of Jesus. If you're getting panic attacks and anxiety, you might want to seek a deliverance minister. Many falsely believe a Christian cannot be demonized but I've seen Christians get delivered. There are thousands of people willing to pray for you for free here (Deliverance Map — Isaiah Saldivar)

Satan will try and get you to doubt Jesus and your salvation but God will not take His Spirit back. If you have believed (trusted) in Jesus and what He did for you on the cross you are saved. Nothing more is required despite what the the popular baptist calvinists on youtube will tell you.

I would start with deliverance because at least if you don't get delivered you can work from there. Don't stop at one prayer session though, try and get a few people to pray for you, and preferably by a deliverance minister in person.

 

[tre_corvus]

I would suggest reading daily through the gospels, as well as reading historical books on the life of Jesus. If you're getting panic attacks and anxiety, you might want to seek a deliverance minister. Many falsely believe a Christian cannot be demonized but I've seen Christians get delivered. There are thousands of people willing to pray for you for free here (Deliverance Map — Isaiah Saldivar)

Satan will try and get you to doubt Jesus and your salvation but God will not take His Spirit back. If you have believed (trusted) in Jesus and what He did for you on the cross you are saved. Nothing more is required despite what the the popular baptist calvinists on youtube will tell you.

I would start with deliverance because at least if you don't get delivered you can work from there. Don't stop at one prayer session though, try and get a few people to pray for you, and preferably by a deliverance minister in person.

My panic attacks come and go in waves which I know is normal for my condition. After they stop I often just feel silly like I dont even remember why I was questioning it in the first place.

Its not the first time ive gone through this, i would have thought that it would be easier the second or third time but its still just as distressing.

I do feel a bit better today, I wrote out a prayer like a letter, it had been a while and I realized maybe all this time I went looking for answers to questions maybe I should have just turned more towards God, told him how I feel, asked for forgiveness and help, talked to my wife after and felt lifted a bit.

It's so easy to go down a rabbit hole of questions and questioning the questions and today it just felt like... Does this matter? Can I fix this myself by overthinking, can I ever perfectly know and understand anything? Or do I just trust God to give me what I need, entrust myself to his care... and when I actually did that it felt like a weight kind of came off and shortly after my faith in Christ didnt seem as far away either.

I think im going to go back to writing out my prayers more often and maybe talking to my wife more... instead of holding it all up inside of me grasping to try and figure because im scared to the point I start to lose direction.

 

[tre_corvus]

Thank you for you reply, ive never heard of deliverance an action or ministry I'll try and look into it

 

[NBB]

Yes i agree with the other poster, a lot of 'mental issues', are like in Jesus times, spiritual problems, the bible is reliable.
it's just people and even christians are not aware of this.

I have some history with this kind of problems in my life, and deliverance helped.

IDK which church or minister could help you in your area etc. But i too think seeking one could help.

 

[TPop]

I dont know where to put this, i have all 4 of thr diagnosis on the top of the mental health section here on Christian forums. My problem is also spiritual. Its been stuck in my head and I dont know what to do. My faith in the one true God is not a problem, I can see His work, his nature, I can see his spirit alive in people and I feel him. My faith in the death and resurrection I dont deny God's power over all creation.

I dunno how it started but I started having doubts about Jesus, was he who he said, did he do what he did, do I really believe in Jesus. I realize I have a hard time saying it out loud. "I believe in Jesus" because I doubt myself, i question if I really do because sometimes I dont or cant wrap my head around it. This has happened before, when i get panic attacks and bad anxiety I question everything including my own reality. It gets really distressing because I want to reach out for comfort but feel like I cant or shouldnt or wont be heard because in that moment I'm rejecting Him. I dont want to... I'm not against him, I'm just not sure of anything. i just need to know God still has me, that even if I dont have much faith or even any I still have His grace and this feeling and loop im stuck in will pass, that he'll help me get better. That my faith will get stronger with this struggle not worse.

Please consider therapy with a Good Christian Social Worker, and a Psychiatrist for possible medication.

It sounds like if someone were to ask you to defend your Christian beliefs, you might feel like your on a bridge like this. Fear, insecurity, unsure about what you know, believe, think.
This is a bridge I would not want to cross and if I had to I would be making it up as I go, being very cautious, very careful not to do the wrong thing, holding on to everything I could but none of it looks same. Is that you? It's OK if it is.
View attachment 343092


We want to be on this bridge. Strong, stable, reliable.

Circular reasoning does not work well for many, especially for non-believers. It's OK to need more. You want to stand on solid ground and there is evidence that can provide that to you.

E.g.,
How do you know God is real?

Because the Bible tells us so.​

How do you know the Bible is trustworthy?

Because God tells us so.​

How do you know God is real?...

There are things that can help you.
One is this book. 10 Biblical Discoveries in Archology.

Within this book you will learn about an aqueduct that the Jews created prior to being attacked. 1700 meters long from a water source into the pool in the city. They started at both ends and met in the middle. Remarkable! In the tunnel is a plaque. I forget what it says. But it dates back to the Jews and their building of this water project.

More spectacular, is the book of Daniel. Read it. This is the book that either gives one assurance or causes one to leave Christianity. How can prophecy some 500 years before it occurred, be delivered and then be so accurate. None-belivers will tell you it cant be. In this book, a Silver Scroll is shown that was found with the Dead Sea Scrolls. Which references specific parts of the Book of Daniel. Dating the prophecy of Daniel back to 500 years prior to the completion of the prophecy. Remarkable!

So evidence was lying around. Undiscovered, the demonstrates the truth behind scripture. Muslims when excavating like to take everything they don't need and dump in a pile destroying the authenticity, destroying the level or depth of the find by mixing it with other finds into a useless hill of stuff so that the Jews cannot make any claims to it. But the evidence does appear, and there is more evidence. Just because it is not found yet, does not mean it does not exist.

Sometimes having physical evidence to demonstrate the authenticity of scripture is a blessing and strengthens us so we are not on a wobbly bridge but a solid bridge we feel safe on.

Peace and Blessings