Is it OK to touch on Holy Week? Masturbating during Lent?

[MissCacadu]

Hello!

This thread is not for discussing whether or not masturbation is a sin but whether it´s a good idea not to do it for a while, during the 40 days of the Lent. I decided not to touch during the Lent because I thought it was a good idea, better than not eating meat etc. I think it´s good to know you can be without it for a while even if you don´t think it´s a sin.

BUT now, after about a week without self-sex, I´ve started to doubt whether this was such a good idea. The idea of the Lent is probably through diminishing distractions to concentrate more on the spirituality, praying and so on. Well I can´t say that this has really made my concentration on spirituality much better. It´s not so bad I couldn´t handle it or keep not mastubating but I have huge difficulties to keeping my thoughts on the spiritual matters since I´m slightly aroused (often), and it seems my body agrees because if it doesn´t get what it wants when I´m awake, it has started to happen in my dreams...

Perhaps, it would actually help the concentration if the sexual needs would be satisfied as before...? Is there any point not have self-sex when you´re awake, and have it basically done during your sleep, or just be continuosly slightly aroused?

 

[Jim2011]

I'm sorry, I am not sure how to answer your question. I have also promised to give it up for lent. It seems like a good idea....I am struggeling also.

 

[sphsjags]

I went 14 months and 10 days without masturbating, between senior year of high school and freshman year of college. The reason I started again is because I had proved to others, and myself that I can do without it. Why I started again, I don't know. The only side effect of stopping was a wet dream on the 14th of every month, like clockwork. You can stop. I believe in you.

 

[Jim2011]

Thanks

 

[sphsjags]

How's it going?

 

[Jim2011]

Ok
a few thoughts before I go to bed. Is touching yourself wrong because it creates an idol between us and God? or is it wrong because we lust in our hearts? <if you thought about John Deer tractors instead....> sorry, its late and I tend to get "funny" when its late.
Am I creating another idol by the constant worry about touching yourself?
<sigh> I am going to go to bed and have a quiet conversation with God.

 

[MonicaCalamity]

I'm giving this up too.
My biggest reason for doing it in the first place, aside from fleshy urges, is to keep from doing with other people. I'm single, and I don't want to engage is sex with random guys, or get into a relationship and wonder if sex is the ONLY reason we're together. I've had issues with this in the past. Now, I want to really wait before having sex with someone. In the meantime, I have those urges, and it's pretty easy to call a guy up at 3am to help me out with that. So I touch.

I say that I may touch maybe 3 times a month. Lent came around this season, and I was like, I'll give that up. Didn't think it would be THIS hard. I did better giving up cursing (which I've always felt like I would end up breaking).

Okay, so Lent, and our sacrifice, is suppose to bring us closer to God. Hmm... you know how they say men think about sex ever 3 nano-seconds or something like that? That's SOOOOOO me right now. I'm CONSTANTLY thinking of sex. I'm in a ministry at my parish, and I'm starting to think about my bics (brothers in Christ) in a sexual manner.<staff edit> I suppose this is the devil, but he's really micro-managing, eh?

Nights are the worse (when I typically would touch).<staff edit> The first week, I would wake up and have to open a window JUST to calm down. I've NEVER needed to touch like that. EVER!

<staff edit>Just craziness that I've never done before.

Then I have questions about giving it up for Lent, because I'm totally planning on doing it Monday morning after Easter, like at 2a. So what good is giving up this sin during Lent if I KNOW I'm going to continue to do it after Easter?

To me, it's just as weird as having, say a long term boyfriend, and you go to confession every Saturday knowing you're going to continue to have sex with him because you have been living together for 4 years.

I dunno. This is probably the hardest thing I've ever been through. Maybe it's hard because I want to have a full understanding of it.

I talked to both of the Fathers at my parish, and they kinda just tell me in their Irish accents (yeah, we happen to have 2 priest from Ireland) it's natural and I'm young (both in age and my faith journey).

I'm glad I've ran across this forum, because I really can't talk to my bics or sics at church. I know some of them struggle with lust (especially since many of them are IN relationships) but they are nowhere near as open about matters such as sex as I am.

 

[MonicaCalamity]

From my understanding, masturbation is wrong because sex in general is suppose to be for husband and wife to a) make babies, and/or b) to unify the marriage.

So when I've confessed this, my priest would explain that God wants us to share our love, not be selfish and love ourselves. I'm thinking that masturbating is thus a selfish act. But I've always used the acronym for lust, Let Us Sin Together. Wouldn't it be better for me to commit the act alone, versus bringing someone else along for the ride??? *shrugs*

So I guess the whole idol thing can be that we end up idolizing ourselves. But don't most who touch think about other, stimulating subjects and/or have visual aids (p@rn, posters of some chick in Maxim, etc.)? But then I guess we would be idolizing THAT.

I've mentioned that I touch to keep from being over-heated and sleeping with a bunch of guys...and feeling EMPTY as heck afterwards. I explained my situation to my priest and he advised that I start going out on dates. Not to have sex, but to not keep my love to myself.

And I agree about making another idol by worrying about masturbation. I've been thinking about it more than ever. And when you start getting distracted in Mass (or whatever church service you attend) you KNOW it's bad.

 

[Philothei]

Ok
a few thoughts before I go to bed. Is touching yourself wrong because it creates an idol between us and God? or is it wrong because we lust in our hearts? <if you thought about John Deer tractors instead....> sorry, its late and I tend to get "funny" when its late.
Am I creating another idol by the constant worry about touching yourself?
<sigh> I am going to go to bed and have a quiet conversation with God.

I think the second is the worse part the lusting we keep in our hearts. Our bodies are God's own temple and we need to keep them clean. Saying this sometimes we will fall we will be tempted as no man ever lived and did not sin. Sure we will fall. IMHO it is getting up again picking up the Cross and go on that we should be focusing on. The fact that it is bad is mostly that takes away from our cares. Some say it is mechanical and ok. Still I think that it takes us away from our focus that is God. It can become a priority a focus a distruction ... It is better to uproot it every time you fall to denounve it. My 0.2 cents ... And yeah I agree that it can be done we have to be strong. But like other sinful habbits it is not the only one hard to do overeating is hard, lazyness is the same, smoking is bad...

Is our focus on avoiding it a temptation itself...it could be true but if we use some ways to "distruct" ourselves it does not need to be like taking a walk, listening to music, talking with a friend...etc.

 

[yourstrulyjulie]

.

 

[Silver2001]

If you give the devil one inch he will take a mile. You touch one time, and he has a grip on you. You just gave him power, and he will work on you till you come to a point where you are going to loose your mind and all that you are going to think about is sex.

You must turn to God and ask him what you sin is. Do not assume that it is masturbation, or sex sin... ask Him, for He knows better than you. Once he shows you, you must repent and start taking your will back from the devil.

If you do not think that masturbation is wrong, why would it bring you into such captivity to the point that is all that you think about?

Think about this question for a min.

Hope this helps everyone!