I wish God would just kill me.

[unlovable1]

I am desperately lonely, have prayed about this for years and nothing seems to be happening. I'm close to 31 and still not any closer to dating than I was in high school. Why give me this desire to be with someone if nothing evee comes of it? Am I just to supposed to be a warning to other people somehow?

 

[BlessedMommy05]

I read this and had to reply... Let me share some thing with you and most may or may not agree, but its my thoughts on the situation.. I was married to I thought my love of my life, yes we had hardships and ups and downs and we have 1child.. So now having been married and been through recently divorce, and Im 38.. So let me give you food for thought ok..

Single life has its "perks"if you will. No one but God to answer to,come and go as you please ect, work, do what you desire, like hobbies, movies and hang with good solid friends...

Marriage has its perks to.. Some one to come home to, talk to, and be with, and have children ect...

But out of those 2 things which is more pros/cons in the life you want to lead, weather its Christian or what ever it maybe. What do you deep down desire.. Alot say when you dont "look" for someone, then its when it happens, the person comes to you...

Focus on the Lord and what your hearts desire, and keep living life to the best of your ability often its our needs vs wants.. Think about it... Beset of luck..

 

[Schrodinger's Hat]

You're in my prayers.

 

[unlovable1]

You're in my prayers.

Thanks.

 

[GenetoJean]

I am desperately lonely, have prayed about this for years and nothing seems to be happening. I'm close to 31 and still not any closer to dating than I was in high school. Why give me this desire to be with someone if nothing evee comes of it? Am I just to supposed to be a warning to other people somehow?

Thoughts of loneliness drive me to wish I was dead also sometimes. My heart goes out to you. In my experience loneliness hurts my heart and will to live more than anything else that I experience.

 

[Scott1979]

You have to learn to be content by yourself before you can be with anyone else. You can't be with anyone because you are lonely. That is the wrong reason and it will not last. You need to work on your self confidence and self esteem. I know it's a lot easier said than done but it is something you must do. Any real relationship isn't going to last if the person you are with feels like they constantly have to play cheer leader for you. Now don't get me wrong we will all have things that happen that get us down. Having someone there to help through those times is normal. Day in day out of having to pump you up will wear anyone out.

As already stated, focus on God more than anything. Then focus on the good things about yourself. Find as much positive thinking stuff you possibly can and read, read, read. It applies to garbage in then you get garbage out. You have to feed yourself positive and it will get better. It's a slow process but it will happen.

 

[ReesePiece23]

My view has always been that 'dating' is tediously overrated. It's society's pressure that dupes people into believing that they are obligated to date; have one night affairs, etc, etc, etc. It's all nonsense, and it creates unnecessary anguish in people who don't live up to the expectation of having to date people.

The thing is, everyone is different. There is no cookie cutter formula that everyone has to follow. Keep in mind that God knows you, better than you know you. God knows what's best for you, better than you do. And Gods love is infinitely more powerful than any love that a human can provide. Trust in him, rest in him and he will provide for you when the time is right for >>you<<.

Get down to the church, volunteer your time for those who'll benefit from you. Get your nose into a bible, and draw into your friends. Forget what society is telling you through the medium of MTV and reality TV and ask God to point you into the direction he has planned for you.

The love from another human, is just a mere bonus that comes from loving and respecting yourself. Bury your sorrows in doing good and serving the lord; then you'll see what it is I'm waffling on about.

 

[singpeace]

I am desperately lonely, have prayed about this for years and nothing seems to be happening. I'm close to 31 and still not any closer to dating than I was in high school. Why give me this desire to be with someone if nothing evee comes of it? Am I just to supposed to be a warning to other people somehow?

Isaiah 54:5
New English Translation (NET)
5 For your husband is the one who made you—
the Lord who commands armies is his name.
He is your protector, the Holy One of Israel.
He is called “God of the entire earth.”


Hosea 2:16
“At that time,” declares the Lord, “you will call, ‘My husband’; you will never again call me, ‘My master.’


My Daughter,

First, you are not unlovable.
However, you wonder if I really love you and see you. Romans 5:8

I do love you, and I can always see you. I know everything about you.
Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.
Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways.
Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.
Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image.
Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being.
Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring.
Acts 17:28

I knew you even
before you were conceived.
Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation.
Ephesians 1:11-12

You were not a mistake,
for all your days are written in my book.
Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth
and where you would live.
Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother's womb.
Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born.
Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented
by those who don't know me.
John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry,
but am the complete expression of love.
1 John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.
1 John 3:1

Simply because you are my child
and I am your Father.
1 John 3:1

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.
Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father.
Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.
James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.
Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.
Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love.
Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts toward you are countless
as the sand on the seashore.
Psalms 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you.
Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession.
Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you
with all my heart and all my soul.
Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things.
Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart,
you will find me.
Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you
the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires.
Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you
than you could possibly imagine.
Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father who comforts you
in all your troubles.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted,
I am close to you.
Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb,
I have carried you close to my heart.
Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away
every tear from your eyes.
Revelation 21:3-4

And I'll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you
even as I love my son, Jesus.
John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.
John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being.
Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,
not against you.
Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression
of my love for you.
1 John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved
that I might gain your love.
Romans 8:31-32

When you received the gift of my son Jesus,
you received me.
1 John 2:23

And nothing will ever separate you
from my love again.
Romans 8:38-39

The day you came to know my Son Jesus, I threw the biggest party heaven had ever seen.
Luke 15:7

I have always been Father,
and will always be Father.
Ephesians 3:14-15

My question is, “Will you trust Me?” Proverbs 3:5

I am waiting for you.
2 Peter 3:9

Love, Your Dad
Almighty God

 

[Criada]

I'm sorry - loneliness is a very hard thing to deal with.
Remember, though, however it seems right now, God's promises are still true - He does have a plan for you which is good, and you will see it.

 

[Krissy Cakes]

You have my prayers.

 

[Heardthebells]

You can be married and lonely.

 

[unlovable1]

I actually let myself feel hope for once and of course it gets crushed. The girl I was interested in of couse is dating someone else and another I thought was a friend told me to never call them again. I'm tired of this constant emotional pain.

 

[ReesePiece23]

Not to sound patronising; but it sounds to me as if the lord is knocking at your door. You may open that front door, but God is so gracious he won't step inside until you invite him in. (He's very polite that way)

God stood on my porch for a long time. And for a lot of people God never enters the lounge, he just stands in the hallway.

 

[dhh712]

I am desperately lonely, have prayed about this for years and nothing seems to be happening. I'm close to 31 and still not any closer to dating than I was in high school. Why give me this desire to be with someone if nothing evee comes of it? Am I just to supposed to be a warning to other people somehow?

I'm sorry to hear that you feel this way. I don't think you're suppose to be a kind of warning or something like that. I wish I had some sort of great revelation to tell you or at least some advice, but I really don't. I'm lonely too, though I don't think I can ever be with anyone the way I want to. I love someone else whose dead (though it's not what's commonly thought of when someone says that and not something I can explain that won't sound completely psychotic to other people).

I'd love for God to put someone in my life, but I guess it's just not going to happen. If it does, then I will be grateful for it; if not then I will try to be happy with what I do have. Whatever happens in our lives is for our good even though it may not seem that way at the time. I know it is easy to say that but next to impossible to believe it especially when we suffer, for I don't think there is anyone that can view suffering as a form of love without having some mental derangement.

Yet that is what is going on when we do suffer and that is about all I have to offer by way of an answer to your pain. I commiserate with how you're feeling though because there have been so many times when I wished that God would just kill me because I long for something so much that the absence of it is so painful. I feel horribly guilty about this love I do have too because I feel that it might be stronger than the love I have for God and I don't want it to be that way.

One thing I do keep in mind is that since I do not have any one in my life that it is better for me. I may want someone, but I feel that since I do not have anyone now, then it can only mean that having someone in my life would not have been a good thing for me. I guess that relates to what I was saying before that whatever happens is for our good, so I suppose I am just elaborating on that. I guess I can understand it more easily because I know myself and how difficult I am to live with; I may seem lovable on the surface but inside there is such sadness and longing. I think perhaps I would be a great burden to someone, so it is probably better for them and for me for me to be alone--for me so that I don't have the guilt of having to burden someone with this awful grief I live with.

 

[unlovable1]

Not to sound patronising; but it sounds to me as if the lord is knocking at your door. You may open that front door, but God is so gracious he won't step inside until you invite him in. (He's very polite that way)

God stood on my porch for a long time. And for a lot of people God never enters the lounge, he just stands in the hallway.

Can you explain? I'm a little confused.

 

[Miss Elly]

I am desperately lonely, have prayed about this for years and nothing seems to be happening. I'm close to 31 and still not any closer to dating than I was in high school. Why give me this desire to be with someone if nothing evee comes of it? Am I just to supposed to be a warning to other people somehow?

It is so hard to be lonely. It's a sickness like any disease I think. You cannot overcome this in yourself. The devil does not want you to believe that this state is a trial of your faith and that it is only temporary. Keep crying out to God, He cares about you.

 

[LJCTAM]

Hey unlovable, there are many of us going through the exact same thing. Just know that there are people on CF that understand what it is like daily. We share in your suffering by going through similarities of affliction. I am at a loss for words many times. I just remembered something in Isaiah (49:13) --

"Shout for joy, you heavens; rejoice, you earth; burst into song, you mountains! For the LORD comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones."

Many of us on waiting on the Lord too, it is very very hard.

 

[VeritatisCupitor]

It's an unfortunate situation however, I will say this. I doubt God will give you a partner even if you are in desperate need of one.

Unlike a lot of other people on this board, I'm a lot more pragmatic and less spiritual. If I am going to get a partner I'll go and get involved with activities with would bring me closer to people who share a common interest.

Instead of trusting God who apparently hasn't answered so far, go seek your own and find your true love. Hope for the best but expect the worst, after such a long time of waiting, it would seem pointless to continue waiting.

 

[Teesang]

Sometimes I feel like the unknown of the future is just too much for me to bear. I still do sometimes think about asking God to kill me because of how scared I am sometimes. But I realized that faith is to follow the light in the darkness. Let God lead you to wherever you may go. I found this android app that helped me when I was in depression. It's called Daily Bible Quotes + by hinteq apps.

 

[MadamImAdaminChrist]

We are almost all lonely. Maybe not desperately lonely-I have been desperately lonely-but lonely. Like one poster said, marriage can be lonely. Singlehood can be lonely. We have this desire to connect and it often remains unfulfilled. I am unfulfilled right now in my relationships, but I want to be excited and involved in my mission/calling/career and with friends and groups before I am dating seriously--because dating really is not as important to me as the other things. And my wish is that it were not so important in your life as well, and that you moved from desperately lonely to simply lonely before starting to date--it is so hard to date when you desire so much!