How to get rid of a spanking fetish

[STR 2017]

I'm new to this forum and couldn't find an answer to my question in earlier threads, so I want to ask my own more specific question. For your convenience, I will put out the TLDR (too long, didn't read) question first before I give you a full description of the background situation.

TLDR

How likely is it to get rid of a spanking desire by actually getting spanked?

Full description

I'm a single Christian man in his mid-20s in Europe. For years, I've fantasized about being spanked. I'm not even sure if I have to call it a 'fetish' at all, because that implies a sexual connotation and I'm not sure if or to what extent it's sexual in my case. Besides, I don't identify as LGBT, but I have always found it more appealing to fantasize about being spanked by another man than by a woman. I guess I've just always associated administering physical discipline much more with men than with women. Still, I decided to post this under the 'Struggles with sexuality' heading because I didn't see a better alternative. Anyway, let's just say that I like the idea of being spanked by another man.

I used to think that undergoing an actual spanking would intensify this desire, but I doubt it now. On my holiday destination earlier this year, another man gave me a long and hard bare bottom spanking with a belt. (Too long and complicated story to explain how that happened, but it may be good for you to know that he is the only person on earth who knows I have this desire because I've never shared it with anyone else.) I was so relieved to finally undergo what I'd secretly wanted for years and to find out it was actually pretty disappointing. It didn't arouse or satisfy me nearly as much as I thought it would. Initially, this experience subdued my spanking desire to such an extent that I thought I was getting rid of it. Later, however, it gradually came back, but not as forcefully as it had been before.

This experience sort of gives me the hope that undergoing another spanking might subdue my spanking desire even more than had been the case the first (and so far only) time. I don't think it's a good idea to arrange a spanking appointment online, however, because I'm afraid I'm then getting involved in a world I'd rather stay far away from. I would rather want it to happen spontaneously, as I sometimes saw happen at student parties with drinking games or so when I was still studying. I'm aware I can't steer situations in a direction where this happens spontaneously (because then it's no longer spontaneous), but I still wonder: Could I actually get rid of this spanking fetish precisely by getting spanked (either by hand or with a tool on either my clothes or my bare bottom)?

Beyond this specific question, I'm also wondering if people recognize this and have been in similar situations. I'd really appreciate any help, comments or feedback. Thanks so much in advance!

 

[peaceful-forest]

I'm not sure if you can get rid of your fetish by engaging in it. You engaged in it before and it went away, but now it has come back. I don't think this is the best solution to handle the problem.

Here's a couple of questions:
1 - What is it you like about spanking? What does it give you? Can you remember when this fetish started?
2 - Have you prayed to God about it? If not, ask Him to take it away from you or guide you to the solution.

 

[KidBrucie]

I'm new to this forum and couldn't find an answer to my question in earlier threads, so I want to ask my own more specific question. For your convenience, I will put out the TLDR (too long, didn't read) question first before I give you a full description of the background situation.

TLDR

How likely is it to get rid of a spanking desire by actually getting spanked?

Full description

I'm a single Christian man in his mid-20s in Europe. For years, I've fantasized about being spanked. I'm not even sure if I have to call it a 'fetish' at all, because that implies a sexual connotation and I'm not sure if or to what extent it's sexual in my case. Besides, I don't identify as LGBT, but I have always found it more appealing to fantasize about being spanked by another man than by a woman. I guess I've just always associated administering physical discipline much more with men than with women. Still, I decided to post this under the 'Struggles with sexuality' heading because I didn't see a better alternative. Anyway, let's just say that I like the idea of being spanked by another man.

I used to think that undergoing an actual spanking would intensify this desire, but I doubt it now. On my holiday destination earlier this year, another man gave me a long and hard bare bottom spanking with a belt. (Too long and complicated story to explain how that happened, but it may be good for you to know that he is the only person on earth who knows I have this desire because I've never shared it with anyone else.) I was so relieved to finally undergo what I'd secretly wanted for years and to find out it was actually pretty disappointing. It didn't arouse or satisfy me nearly as much as I thought it would. Initially, this experience subdued my spanking desire to such an extent that I thought I was getting rid of it. Later, however, it gradually came back, but not as forcefully as it had been before.

This experience sort of gives me the hope that undergoing another spanking might subdue my spanking desire even more than had been the case the first (and so far only) time. I don't think it's a good idea to arrange a spanking appointment online, however, because I'm afraid I'm then getting involved in a world I'd rather stay far away from. I would rather want it to happen spontaneously, as I sometimes saw happen at student parties with drinking games or so when I was still studying. I'm aware I can't steer situations in a direction where this happens spontaneously (because then it's no longer spontaneous), but I still wonder: Could I actually get rid of this spanking fetish precisely by getting spanked (either by hand or with a tool on either my clothes or my bare bottom)?

Beyond this specific question, I'm also wondering if people recognize this and have been in similar situations. I'd really appreciate any help, comments or feedback. Thanks so much in advance!

I'm so glad I happened on your thoroughly interesting post. I've had a wealth of related experience over the years (I'm 71), actually never having gotten the spankings I deserved as a sometimes mischievous boy. My mother and occasionally my oldest sister had charge of me, but while they could bring themselves to threaten to spank me, I was invariably punished by the withdrawal of their affection.

At the age of six, I found myself fascinated by spanking as a traditional children's punishment. I never misbehaved with the thought of maybe provoking a bottom warming, but still, there was nothing in my life experience to argue against spanking becoming my secret fantasy playland. I know my mother came to regret never having taken me over her lap, even in my teens. I was 14 when she privately asked me one day if I felt I'd "missed out by never getting a bare bottom spanking." She undoubtedly knew me well enough (I'd forgotten an incriminating paperback in the bathroom) to know the honest answer. In any case, I had nothing like the nerve to provide it, so I was dismissively told to "stop being silly." That's about as close as I ever came to having my spanking addiction overpowered by the genuine disciplinary article.

If you're open to email, I could happily deal more directly with the 'spanking submissive' issues you raised.

 

[KidBrucie]

How likely is it to get rid of a spanking desire by actually getting spanked?

Growing up, there were several instances where both my mother and my oldest sister threatened to spank me. In the case of my sister, I'd been caught stealing the change from my older sisters' coat pockets. This was when our mum was away at Teachers College, and this sister had charge of me. I would've been eight years old then, making her 16. I remember being stood next to her while she fixed her hair in the bathroom mirror. She flaunted her authority, threateningly asking me if I wanted her to pull down my pants and paddle my bare bottom. I have to assume I answered no (even though I was already enthralled with spanking by this point), but there was no question I deserved to be spanked.

It may have been just pocket change I took, but I knew how wrong it was to steal. I was also coming to understand the need for punishment in a child's upbringing. Children back in the 1950s and '60s were commonly subject to spankings as correction for their disobedience. By rights, my sister should've confronted me with my wrongdoing, explained that I was going to be spanked for it, and then bared my bottom for my punishment across her knee. My fantasies notwithstanding, I knew a spanking was supposed to hurt, but that was the whole point of corporal punishment. It so happened that my bottom was best suited to corrective smacking and paddling, so having it turned up and warmed, and no doubt making me cry, would've served me right.

I should've been spanked. Getting spanked would've been consistent with my belief in the natural order of things. I knew when I'd been naughty, and punishment of some kind was needed to hold me accountable. It needn't have always meant having my bottom spanked, but in those days, an over-the-knee, bare bottom spanking was the definitive unhappy consequence of a child's misbehaving.

In actual fact, my only direct experience with corporal punishment happened one day in my Grade 7 class. I'd been caught playing at my desk when I should've been working. Ashamed, I was called to the front of the class to be strapped on my palms by our rather grandmotherly teacher. She was also the school's Vice Principal, so doling out meaningful, memorable discipline came under her job description. She didn't make me cry, but my eyes definitely watered. As I shuffled back to my desk with my palms on fire, I couldn't imagine my ever provoking another such shameful punishment. And at the same time, surely having my bottom soundly spanked at home could've been just as effective.

A related instance with my mother happened when I was maybe ten, and she was teaching at my school. She phoned home after classes one afternoon. I've long since forgotten why, but I didn't hesitate to let her know she was interrupting one of my favourite TV shows. Not too much time passed before she came through the front door. Her very first words upon seeing me (likely still parked in front of the television) were an angry "For two cents, I'd spank you!"

I'd have to think that spanking me must've been on her mind all the way home. As much as she knew of my fixation on the subject (she'd found my crude drawings and written descriptions), it still shouldn't have kept her from being true to her maternal instincts and giving me the overdue spanking I had every fearful right to expect. For all I know, it might very well have closed the book on my enshrinement of Child Spanking, but too many such opportunities in my development came and went neglected.

 

[JamAd]

I'm new to this forum and couldn't find an answer to my question in earlier threads, so I want to ask my own more specific question. For your convenience, I will put out the TLDR (too long, didn't read) question first before I give you a full description of the background situation.

TLDR

How likely is it to get rid of a spanking desire by actually getting spanked?

Full description

I'm a single Christian man in his mid-20s in Europe. For years, I've fantasized about being spanked. I'm not even sure if I have to call it a 'fetish' at all, because that implies a sexual connotation and I'm not sure if or to what extent it's sexual in my case. Besides, I don't identify as LGBT, but I have always found it more appealing to fantasize about being spanked by another man than by a woman. I guess I've just always associated administering physical discipline much more with men than with women. Still, I decided to post this under the 'Struggles with sexuality' heading because I didn't see a better alternative. Anyway, let's just say that I like the idea of being spanked by another man.

I used to think that undergoing an actual spanking would intensify this desire, but I doubt it now. On my holiday destination earlier this year, another man gave me a long and hard bare bottom spanking with a belt. (Too long and complicated story to explain how that happened, but it may be good for you to know that he is the only person on earth who knows I have this desire because I've never shared it with anyone else.) I was so relieved to finally undergo what I'd secretly wanted for years and to find out it was actually pretty disappointing. It didn't arouse or satisfy me nearly as much as I thought it would. Initially, this experience subdued my spanking desire to such an extent that I thought I was getting rid of it. Later, however, it gradually came back, but not as forcefully as it had been before.

This experience sort of gives me the hope that undergoing another spanking might subdue my spanking desire even more than had been the case the first (and so far only) time. I don't think it's a good idea to arrange a spanking appointment online, however, because I'm afraid I'm then getting involved in a world I'd rather stay far away from. I would rather want it to happen spontaneously, as I sometimes saw happen at student parties with drinking games or so when I was still studying. I'm aware I can't steer situations in a direction where this happens spontaneously (because then it's no longer spontaneous), but I still wonder: Could I actually get rid of this spanking fetish precisely by getting spanked (either by hand or with a tool on either my clothes or my bare bottom)?

Beyond this specific question, I'm also wondering if people recognize this and have been in similar situations. I'd really appreciate any help, comments or feedback. Thanks so much in advance!

Can we talk?

 

[STR 2017]

Can we talk?

Yes, of course. So sorry for responding only just now! It turns out my email account (the one I set up for this forum) was suspended, which is why I didn't notice I was missing incoming messages (because I wasn't necessarily expecting replies if people didn't read this). But yes, let's talk! I'm not sure how that works on this platform, so you can send me a private message or do you need my email address?

 

[STR 2017]

I'm so glad I happened on your thoroughly interesting post. I've had a wealth of related experience over the years (I'm 71), actually never having gotten the spankings I deserved as a sometimes mischievous boy. My mother and occasionally my oldest sister had charge of me, but while they could bring themselves to threaten to spank me, I was invariably punished by the withdrawal of their affection.

At the age of six, I found myself fascinated by spanking as a traditional children's punishment. I never misbehaved with the thought of maybe provoking a bottom warming, but still, there was nothing in my life experience to argue against spanking becoming my secret fantasy playland. I know my mother came to regret never having taken me over her lap, even in my teens. I was 14 when she privately asked me one day if I felt I'd "missed out by never getting a bare bottom spanking." She undoubtedly knew me well enough (I'd forgotten an incriminating paperback in the bathroom) to know the honest answer. In any case, I had nothing like the nerve to provide it, so I was dismissively told to "stop being silly." That's about as close as I ever came to having my spanking addiction overpowered by the genuine disciplinary article.

If you're open to email, I could happily deal more directly with the 'spanking submissive' issues you raised.

Yes, I would love to email with you. So sorry for responding only just now! It turns out my email account (the one I set up for this forum) was suspended, which is why I didn't notice I was missing incoming messages (because I wasn't necessarily expecting replies if people didn't read this). But yes, let's talk! My email account is no longer suspended, so can you send me your email address in a private message or how does that work on this platform?

 

[STR 2017]

I'm not sure if you can get rid of your fetish by engaging in it. You engaged in it before and it went away, but now it has come back. I don't think this is the best solution to handle the problem.

Here's a couple of questions:
1 - What is it you like about spanking? What does it give you? Can you remember when this fetish started?
2 - Have you prayed to God about it? If not, ask Him to take it away from you or guide you to the solution.

Hi, I'm so sorry for responding just now, but it turns out my email account was suspended and that's why I didn't notice these messages. Anyway, thanks for your insights and here are my answers.
1. I can't really pinpoint it, but the idea of a painful bottom just entertains me. Maybe it's also the submissiveness that attracts me, but I can't say for certain. I think it started when I watched the 2000 movie David Copperfield, where young David is at some point severely caned by his stepfather.
2. Yes I have. I have asked Him to take it away from me, but I'm not sure this fetish/desire is something you can 'pray away'. I've also often prayed that He would let someone I trusted spank me to see if it would go away, but that also never happened.

 

[JamAd]

Yes, of course. So sorry for responding only just now! It turns out my email account (the one I set up for this forum) was suspended, which is why I didn't notice I was missing incoming messages (because I wasn't necessarily expecting replies if people didn't read this). But yes, let's talk! I'm not sure how that works on this platform, so you can send me a private message or do you need my email address?

adam_miller_99@yahoo.com